My Voice of Reason
by Autumn'sJCraze
Summary: Harleen Quinzel had been waiting a very long time to finally hear the voice of her soulmate inside her head. His malicious laughter is a welcome- albeit unexpected- comfort to the young upcoming psychiatrist. However, her views on love completely change the day she discovers who her soulmate is. She believes she can change him for the better. Will she be able to? ...Of course not.
1. I Hear Him

**AN: Hey guys! This my very first FF that I've ever written so please, please, please go easy on me! I'm going to do my very best to tell this story and I hope you all enjoy it!**

 **;)**

* * *

 **Chapter One**

 **I Hear Him**

I was twenty years old when I first heard his voice.

A loud, booming, raspy, melodic laughter that continued all through the night until I fell asleep.

I have to admit that when I first heard him, I was terrified. It wasn't the fact that I was hearing someone else's voice in my head for the first time. It was the emotion that I could feel behind his laughter. The anger, the sadness, the pain, and the twisted joy beneath it all. It was as if this man was seeing the world in a whole new light. It was as if he was reborn in some way; and the elation that he emitted in his laughter, sent shivers down my spine. There was something masochistic about it. It was as if his pain and suffering was the source of his giddiness. I couldn't understand it; and so, I was afraid.

I remember lying in bed that night and trying desperately to fight sleep. I thought that if I allowed myself to doze off, then I would never hear him again; and that was more terrifying than his twisted laughter.

I had waited a very long time to finally hear him. Most people hear their other voice after they hit puberty. I should have heard mine at the age of fourteen and fifteen like everybody else; but I didn't. I always wondered why. A hundred torturous thoughts would pass my mind every day as I tried to come to terms with my singly occupied mind. I remember how all of my friends would gossip and giggle about their other voices. I remember doing my best to pretend that I was as happy as they were. Whenever someone asked me about my second voice I would lie and makeup a pseudo persona so that my secret would never get out. I did this for six years. That's six years of lying. Six years of worrying that I didn't have a soulmate. Six years of never knowing why. Until that night when I finally heard him.

I still wonder why it took so long for me to hear him. Maybe I wasn't mentally ready for him yet or maybe he wasn't ready for me; I'm not sure. All I know is that I am extremely grateful that I can finally hear him. It's so peculiar having someone else's voice inside your own head. You never know when they're going to say something. It happens out of nowhere. Of course I rarely get to hear my other voice say anything. He's always laughing. At times I hear low distorted whispers that I can make absolutely no sense of; they don't help me understand him at all.

I know that a soulmate's voice can only be heard when they are deeply feeling an emotion or when they are going through something significant. So, I can't help but wonder what it is that keeps my soulmate in such a giddy mood all of the time. I hear him laugh almost every day. I wonder if he's just one of those happy-go-lucky guys who's easy to laugh. The only thing that I know for certain about him, is that he has a deep admiration for the bat vigilante of Gotham. I can hear him call his name at times. _Batman. Batman_. _Batman._ Sometimes he calls him Bats. Nonetheless, whenever he brings up the Batman, he always feels a mix of joy and anger. I don't understand this either.

Sometimes I wonder if he has as much trouble understanding me as I do him. Do my thoughts ring clear in his mind? Did he have to wait as long as I did to hear him? I wonder if he hears me thinking about him because I do that a lot. I don't ever hear him thinking about me though. But then again, I hardly ever hear him think about something concrete.

My soulmate is such a mystery to me. I can't wait till the day comes where I finally get to meet him. I hope he's as whimsical as I imagine him to be. I bet he's got a great sense of humor. I also imagine him being very handsome, and tall for some reason. And, I feel like he's going to be one of those guys who is a total gentleman and is an absolute sweetheart. Oh, I can't wait to meet my very own silly prince charming!

I reluctantly pull myself out of my thoughts for the eighth time that day. I was in the middle of editing my final thesis paper when I let my mind wander. It's just really hard to focus whenever I hear my other voice laugh in that maniacal manner. Whenever I hear him I start thinking about all of the possibilities and questions that this man presents me with.

Once I finish putting the final touches on my paper, I email a copy to myself –just in case- and print the whole thing out. Before I can turn this into my professor at the University, I need to go do my shift at Blackgate first. I've been training my psychiatric abilities at an internship at Blackgate prison for about a year now. I'm just finishing up with school. Once I turn in my final thesis –if it's good enough- I'll finally graduate and get my doctorate degree.

When my entire paper is finally printed, I tie my hair up in a bun, change my clothes, and dash out the door. The nearest train station is a couple of blocks away from my apartment, so I always discreetly grip my keys between my knuckles during this walk. I don't exactly live in the best neighborhood in Gotham; it's not the worst, but it's still pretty bad. I keep my purse close as I board the 'L' train at Wayne Central Station. I arrive at the Blackgate Penitentiary twenty minutes later and I make my way through security to clock in. I throw my things on my desk in the office that I share with three other interns. Guy Kopski is already settled in his desk, munching on a muffin. He looks up and offers me a warm, crumb-lipped smile as he greets me.

"'Morning Harleen. How's it going?"

"Eh, same old, same old," I shrug.

"Did you finish your thesis?"

"Yup," I sigh and attempt to rub away the sleepy feeling from my eyes. "I can't wait to turn it in and finally be done with all this."

Guy grins beneath his muffin. "Aww do I annoy you so much that you can't wait to get out of this internship and leave me?" He does a terrible job at feigning being hurt. "Harleen, I thought what we had was special…"

I smile and roll my eyes as obviously as I can. "Oh Guy, it's not you it's me, I swear." We laugh and continue teasing each other until Daniel Copeland –one of the other interns- strolls into the office with coffee at hand. The three of us exchange pleasantries and talk about where we plan on working when we finish school. Guy wants to work at Arkham Asylum. He's always trying to convince one of us to stay and apply to work at Arkham with him, but the other interns and I don't want to live in Gotham anymore. Daniel and I want to work at S.T.A.R Labs in Metropolis and I remember Amber Lowery –the fourth and final intern here at Blackgate- saying that she wants to work somewhere in Chicago. Honestly, I wouldn't mind working at Arkham Asylum because there are so many interesting and challenging cases that I could get my hands on if I worked there; But, I really hate where I'm living right now. My neighborhood isn't exactly safe and I won't be able to afford a nicer place in Gotham City for a while. If I move to Metropolis right after I finish school, I can afford a cheap place in a much nicer neighborhood than the one I'm living in here. Metropolis is just a safer place to live in right now than Gotham is.

The longer we continue to talk about our future jobs, the closer I feel Guy getting ready to lecture Daniel and me about the benefits of staying and working in Gotham. Before he gets the chance to even start his little speech, I remind my coworkers that we have a job that we should be doing right now. They laugh and head off to their morning sessions. I grab my morning files from my desk and do the same.

* * *

At three o'clock I finish my last therapy session with one of the inmates. Before I leave to the University to drop off my thesis, I decide to have lunch in the break room with everyone else. To my surprise, Daniel is the only one in the room. I pull up a seat opposite him and look around the room quizzically.

"Where is everyone?" I ask.

"I have no idea. I've never seen this room this empty before."

"Me either. It's kind of creepy… I wonder if-" My sentence is cut short when I feel a sharp pain shoot through my head. My hands instantly reach for my forehead in a failed attempt to alleviate the internal pain. Daniel watches me with concern evident in his eyes.

"Harleen are you alright? What's wrong?"

Another pulse of pain shoots through my temple. "I-I don't know."

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_**

My other voice startles me with his booming laughter. I've never heard him this loudly or clearly before. He sounds very proud and triumphant.

As I try to balance listening to Daniel's questions and my other voices laughter, Amber storms into the break room with a frightened look on her face.

"Oh my gosh! Have you guys heard the news?"

Daniel and I furrow our eyebrows in confusion and shake our heads no.

"Where the fuck have you people been?! Turn on the damn news!" Amber's demand seems to startle Daniel a bit because he immediately fumbles for the break room's TV remote. The TV turns on to a GNN breaking news segment.

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_**

Vicky Vale is narrating some live event that's happening on top of the GCPD building, but I can't concentrate on the exact words that she's saying because my other voice's laughter is loudly resonating within my mind.

A helicopter camera flies over the rooftops of Gotham City and slowly zooms in on a man standing over the GCPD. He's a tall lean man with porcelain skin and vibrant green hair. I recognize him immediately as the Joker. I've seen pictures of him before and read a couple of articles about him in the Gotham Times paper, but I've never actually seen him in action. He seems to exhibit a demanding presence that keeps everyone from looking away. His outfit also really helps grab attention because he's dressed to kill in a classic deep purple suit and slicked back hair.

Amber's voice stops me from analyzing the Joker any further. "This guy is seriously fucked up in the head! And that's saying something coming from me." She points to her white signature doctor's coat and refers to the fact that she's soon to be a mental psychiatrist. "I was late today because all of the roads were blocked. Apparently this guy set up several bombs around the city and he's playing some sick guessing game with the Batman. They've got cops roaming all over the city looking for these bombs. They even called in more than half of our security staff here to go and help out. Apparently, one bomb already went off in that steel company on the outskirts; it killed everyone working there that day. I heard that Batman found and disarmed three bombs already but there's still one left. One of the orderlies told me on the way in that he heard that the last one is in Gotham General Hospital. Can you believe it?"

I look from Amber and back to the TV in disgust. What kind of man is he? How on Earth can someone be capable of causing so much chaos and destruction? What kind of person is even capable of blowing up a hospital? What a horribly sick, sick man. How does he live with himself?

I watch as the Joker flamboyantly waves a small remote control looking mechanism around in the air. His lips pull back into a wide beaming grin as he calls out the Batman, taunting him. He then throws his head back and erupts into a loud malicious laughter.

 **-** Wait a minute… I know that laughter…

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!_**

I know that laughter.

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_**

Oh my God, I know that laughter…

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_**

No, no, please no…

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_**

No. Not him… No.

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!_**

IT'S THE SAME LAUGHTER THAT'S RESONATING IN MY HEAD.

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 **AN: What'd you guys think? I hope everyone liked it. I feel it's a little rushed, but, eh. I wanted to get the ball rolling already. Let me know what you guys think! I'll see ya in the next chapter.**


	2. A New Hope

**Chapter Two:**

 **A New Hope**

It's been three days since I found out that the Joker is my soulmate.

THE JOKER IS MY SOULMATE…

I still can't believe it. How on Earth am I supposed to love a man like him? He's so violent and cruel. He's nothing like the man I imagined him to be. Not only am I disappointed, I feel absolutely cheated. I feel I've been cheated out of having a soulmate because there is no way I am ever going to love him. He cannot be the man destined for me. I refuse to accept this. How could I- My brain has been running in circles all weekend!

After the Joker's vibrant performance the other day, I've been keeping to myself. The Joker is all anyone is talking about lately and I'm in no mood to talk about him right now. The fifth and final bomb was located in the Gotham General Hospital by the Batman who immediately disarmed it. He then quickly apprehended the Joker and turned him into Arkham Asylum. That's where he's at right now. I can hear him giggling. _Heeheehahahaha._ He's been in such a good mood since he pulled his little stunt. I on the other hand have been feeling the complete opposite. I just can't seem to understand how that man and I are destined to be together. I really want to understand. I want to understand why he and I are fated to be together. And as much as I hate to say it, the only way I can even begin to understand this, is if I get to know the Joker personally. This means I won't be leaving Gotham after all…

With a heavy sigh I walk to my desk and plop myself down in my chair. I reluctantly fire up my laptop and start putting together my résumé.

* * *

"Harleen, you have been so gloomy this whole week. What's going on?" Amber and I are alone in the intern office while the guys are doing their afternoon therapy sessions. I really appreciate Amber's concern because she has been such a good friend to me, but I don't want her to know the truth about my other voice. I don't want anyone to know.

I smile weakly at Amber and quickly think of another reason for being so melancholy. "Well, I guess I've just been feeling down because our internship is almost over. I'm really going to miss you all."

"Aw Harleen!" Amber pulls me into a gentle hug. "Of course I'm going to miss you too. I'm going to miss everyone. That's why I'm making sure everyone promises to visit me in Chicago. That includes you Harleen; you better visit me." Amber can be real bossy sometimes, but I believe that's one of her best qualities.

"Of course I'm going to visit you. I've always wanted to go to Chicago."

"Good, because I've done so much research about the best hang-outs to go to! We're going to hit the bars, the clubs, eat tons of food, and then-" Amber stops abruptly and I stare at her quizzically as her eyes seem to look off into the distance. Her lips slowly tug at the corners as her face changes into one of complete bliss. I say nothing to pull her out of her reverie because she looks so happy and at peace with herself. She must be listening to her other voice. As I watch Amber listen to her soulmate, I realize how incredibly hurt I am. I don't think I'll ever get to wear that look on my face ever again. I'm in an even worse position now then I was when I couldn't hear my other voice at all. Now that I know who my soulmate is, I can't allow myself to fall for him. Honestly, I think it would have been better to not have a soulmate at all. I know that I should just stay away from him, but for some reason, I want to try understanding him first before I decide to avoid him all together. Ugh, I don't want to be thinking about this now; not here. I decide to break Amber's concentration so that I can have a distraction from my thoughts. I wave my hand in front of her face to grab her attention.

"Hey, Amber are you alright?" She blinks twice before her eyes return their attention to me.

"Yes, I'm sorry. It's just that-" She smiles sweetly and looks down bashfully. "He was singing again." That is so sweet and I am so very jealous.

"Aw, he sings?"

"Mhmm," she shakes her head enthusiastically. "He sings songs about me. About how he can't wait to meet me and how he knows that I can hear him because he feels strongly about me already even though we haven't met yet." Oh, fuck my life. This is the most romantic relationship I've ever heard of! Did I seriously have to hear this now? Why couldn't this have happened a week and half ago when I was still in love with the idea of love. I would have been completely happy and unresentful of Amber then.

"Wow…" is all I manage to say. Amber simply continues to smile in that stupid happy way. I stare at her in wonder and voice my thoughts without meaning to. "What's that like?" Amber furrows her eyebrows and cocks her head to the side slightly.

"What is what like?"

"Umm…" I debate whether to delve further into my question or not. I suppose I can trust her with part of the truth of what's bothering me. "Well, what is it like to know that he loves you back?" Amber's eyes are completely filled with concern as she gently places one of her hands on my shoulder for comfort.

"Do you not think that your soulmate loves you? He's your soulmate. How could he not?" I feel tears forming in my eyes and I immediately blink them away because I do not want to do this here.

"It's just that- I don't know if he loves me. He doesn't think about me the way yours thinks about you."

"Have you met him yet?"

 _Hahahahahaheeeheeehahaha!_ There he goes again…

"No I haven't." But I know who he is…

"Well there you go." Amber offers me an encouraging smile. "He must be living a super busy life that he doesn't even have time to think. I'm sure that once he meets you, you're going to be all he thinks about. So don't lose faith okay?" I smile and pull Amber into a hug. She actually cheered me up a bit.

"Thank you."

I think that there's a possibility that she could be right. I never stopped to think about whether the Joker was capable of love or not; but what if he is? What if he actually does fall in love with me? Would my love change him? Would he drop his insanity to become a normal man for me? What if I'm meant to be his savior? If this is the case then I have to meet him before he decides to concoct another plan to hurt more people. But can I really change him? Can I actually make him sane? I guess I won't know until I try. I really hope I can do this. I thank Amber again because without her realizing it, she has implanted a new hope in me.

Now that my mood has lightened, Amber and I start talking more animatedly about Chicago. I'm really glad to hear how excited she is to start a new life there. Guy and Daniel walk into the office when Amber and I are finishing up talking about Chicago's food.

"Guess who just got a call from a Dr. Jeremiah Arkham?" Says Guy as he slides into his desk chair.

"You heard back from the asylum already?" I ask. They haven't called me yet. I sent in my résumé five days ago. Guy doesn't know though. He'll be ecstatic when he finds out.

"Mhmm. Dr. Arkham wants to interview me tomorrow afternoon, so Harleen can you cover my two o'clock appointment?"

"Uh sure. No problem."

"Thanks." I wonder when I'll get called in. IF I get called in. …I hope so. My level of anticipation for meeting the Joker has gone up tremendously since talking to Amber. I really want to get inside his head. Literally, I smile to myself.

* * *

On Thursday night I got a call from Dr. Joan Leland. She said that Dr. Arkham wanted to interview me on Saturday morning; the day after our graduation. I quickly agreed because the sooner I get this interview over with, the sooner I can meet the Joker- hopefully. Recently I've been keeping my mood neutral by only focusing on meeting him and nothing more. I'm not dwelling on his previous actions or the fact that I completely disapprove of them. I'm simply focusing on what lies ahead. I'm hopeful that the future will be good to me because with regards to this whole soulmate business, life has not been so kind.

After graduation, the other interns and I went out for drinks and partied the night away. We enjoyed our last day together because Amber and Daniel were flying out to Chicago and Metropolis the next day. With my interview so early the next morning, it wasn't smart of me to stay up so late; But I was really going to miss my little posse, so I decided to live it up with them until the very last minute.

I still haven't told any of them about my plans to work at Arkham Asylum. Daniel was confused when I told him that I wouldn't be flying with him to Metropolis. We were thinking about becoming roommates over there. I told him that I didn't think S.T.A.R. Labs was right for me and that I needed to take some time to think about my future. He understood and said that if I changed my mind, he would put in a good word for me. I appreciated that.

Last week Guy triumphantly announced that he would start working at Arkham Asylum come Monday morning. I hope I get to start as soon as he does. Not only am I impatient to meet the Joker, I also really want to start making money so that I can get out of this neighborhood. Plus, I could really use a new car. I don't want to have to take a train and a bus every day to get to work.

Actually, right now I was getting ready to take the train and bus to get to the asylum. It's early Saturday morning and I can feel a chilly spring breeze coming through my cracked window. It was not easy getting up this morning. I have a headache from all of the drinks I had last night. My reflection reveals the fact that I'm running on four hours of sleep. I have dark circles under my eyes that I promptly cover up with some foundation. I lightly blush my cheeks pink and apply light brown eye shadow. Mascara is my final touch before I move onto my hair. I was originally planning on wearing my hair down, but as I look at my reflection, the woman looking back at me looks very young and unprofessional. So I decide to tie it up in a high ponytail. However, there's still something missing. I glance over at my glasses case and debate whether to wear them or not. They're non-prescription glasses that I used at a costume party when I dressed as a librarian. I remember how mature that they made me look, so I decide to wear them; and it does the trick. I actually look like a psychiatrist and not some silly college sorority girl.

Once I've finished getting dressed I head out the door and make my way towards Wayne Central Station. I start thinking about all of the different scenarios of which I ask Dr. Arkham to let me treat the Joker. I understand that he is an extremely high profile case; Heck, he probably is the most dangerous and high profile patient at Arkham Asylum. But I have to at least try to get him as my patient. I know that there is a high probability that he will say no, and I'm prepared for that. I'm more than willing to work my way to the top. I won't rest until I have the Joker as my patient. I need to get to know him. I want to understand him; to understand us. If anything, I hope my eagerness to take on this case will help me seem like the type of person who loves a challenge and is ready for anything.

When I arrive at the gates of Arkham Asylum, the gothic appeal of the entire facility overwhelms me. I'm sure that this eerie atmosphere has sent plenty of people running with their tails between their legs before they even enter the gates; I wasn't about to be one of those people. I march through the front yard in a determined stride. When I open the door and step into the building, an immense, peculiar feeling of belonging sweeps through me. For some reason I feel welcome here; like I'm right where I'm supposed to be. As weird as it is, this place has put me in a good mood. A content smile creeps up on my face as I greet the woman at the front desk.

"Hi, my name is Dr. Harleen Quinzel, I'm here to see Dr. Arkham."

"Yes of course, he's ready for you." The woman rises from her desk and gestures towards a grand polished stairway. "Right this way Dr. Quinzel." We climb up the stairs and make our way through a bland, narrow hallway. After a couple of twists and turns, we find ourselves outside of Dr. Arkham's office.

A tall shaven man rises from his desk to greet me. He has brown well-groomed hair and green eyes that sit behind thin silver wired glasses. He smiles kindly and we shake hands.

"Hello Dr. Quinzel, it's a pleasure to meet you." My good mood has me beaming brightly back at him.

"Dr. Arkham, the pleasure is all mine."

"Please have a seat." He gestures towards the seat opposite his desk. I sit and gracefully cross one leg over the other. I let my dangled foot swing on its own accord as I speak with Dr. Arkham. It's a little unconscious habit of mine. "Well Dr. Quinzel, I must begin by saying how very impressed I am by your résumé." He grabs a file from a pile on his desk and starts sifting through it. "Fresh out of graduate school and already you have so many high recommendations. These doctors have praised you immensely for the work you've done in your internships; Blackgate Penitentiary in particular. And then of course there's your 4.0 GPA that you've managed to sustain throughout school." He looks up from his file and grins. "So far, I'd say that you have remarkable qualifications Dr. Quinzel."

"Thank you. I've worked really hard to earn the praise of my mentors and colleagues. Believe me, it wasn't easy," I laugh lightly at the recollection of all those people who were so quick to judge and underestimate me by my appearance alone. I swear, just because I have blonde hair does not mean that I am the party girl type. I cannot even begin to count the number of times I've heard someone call me a bimbo behind my back.

"Well I can see that you are a hard worker and that you definitely have a passion for this line of work." Dr. Arkham leans back in his chair and crosses his arms. "I'm going to be honest with you Dr. Quinzel, you are exactly the right kind of doctor that Arkham Asylum is in need of at the moment. Despite your lack of professional experience, I'd say that this facility would benefit greatly from your employment here."

A big stupid grin spreads across my face. "Are you serious?" Dr. Arkham grins.

"Yes." He extends his hand to shake my own again. "Welcome to Arkham Asylum."

* * *

 **AN: Yay! Harleen is going to start working at the Asylum in the next chapter! Sorry there was no Joker in this chapter, but of course he was mentioned a lot. Hope you all liked this, and please feel free to leave any comments that you have. See ya next chapter!**


	3. Moving Forward

**Chapter Three:**

 **Moving Forward**

After two days of waiting for my background check to clear and another day of settling into my very own office, I was finally ready to get to work. I had the pleasure of meeting Dr. Joan Leland officially yesterday when I was bringing my pictures and house plants into my office. She's been assigned to be my mentor of sorts. I don't technically have to report to her, but she will be keeping a close eye on me and any questions I have will have to be answered by her because apparently, Dr. Arkham is too busy to be bothered by simple questions.

I was told that today Dr. Leland and I will be discussing which patients I can possibly begin treating personally. I'm really nervous because I haven't mentioned my interest in treating the Joker at all. I hope he doesn't already have a doctor treating him. He's been a patient here for about three weeks now, so there is a possibility that he's still on the availability list.

When I finally arrive at the asylum after taking a very long train and bus ride, I notice two stacks of paperwork have been carefully placed on my desk. I set my purse to the side and cozy up in my comfy office chair because by the looks of it, I was going to be here for a while. I have a ton of paperwork that I have to read and sign, regarding disclosure agreements, insurance policies, and staff conduct.

Two hours go by in the blink of an eye, and I've only gone through the first stack of paperwork. Just as I'm about to move on to the next stack, I notice a silhouette growing closer towards my open office door. Dr. Leland enters with a pile of files held close to her chest.

"Good morning Harleen. You settling in okay?"

"Yeah. Right now I'm just trying to get through all this paperwork as quickly as possible." I eye the files in her hands and allow myself to look as excited as I feel. "Are those what I think they are?" Dr. Leland smiles.

"Yes," she says as she takes the seat opposite me. She sets the files down on my desk and places a hand over them. "Somewhere in these files lies all the information you'll need on your future patients. We just have to choose them first. Are you ready to get started, or do you want me to come back later when you've finished your paperwork?"

"Oh, no. I've been waiting too long for this moment," I laugh. I'm starting to feel nervous. I hope the Joker's file is in that pile.

"Alright. So, Dr. Arkham has determined that he would like to start you off with two patients alone. He wants to be sure that you adjust yourself here at a steady pace. In about three months you'll gradually be given more and more patients to handle." I nod in agreement. Starting off with only two patients is fine by me. I really only have one patient in mind right now; and the less patients I have, the more I can focus on treating him. "So, without further ado," Dr. Leland lightly pushes the stack of files my way. "Here are your options for your first patients here at Arkham Asylum." I quickly pull the files closer and start opening each one carefully, searching for his name. "You'll find that each of these patients are being held in the minimum security ward, so you needn't worry about your personal safety being compromised. These patients are very docile." Oh no. The Joker is by no means docile, and I highly doubt that they're keeping him under minimum security. …His file isn't going to be here.

I immediately stop sifting through the files and a deep frown sets on my face as I contemplate how to ask for what I want. Dr. Leland notices my displeasure. "Is everything alright Harleen? Have I said something wrong?"

I suck in a big breath of air. "Well it's just that I already had a particular patient in mind and I'm more than certain that he isn't being held in the minimum security ward. So, I know that his file isn't going to be here." I gesture towards the mess of files I've spread across my desk.

"Oh?" Dr. Leland crosses her legs and looks genuinely intrigued by who I could possibly be referring to. "What patient did you have in mind?" I brace myself for her reaction and look her dead in the eyes. It's now or never.

"The Joker."

Dr. Leland's eyes instantly dilate at the sound of his name. She sits up right in her chair and looks as though she's about to protest. Before she gets the chance to say no, I cut her off before she even begins so that I can explain myself.

"Dr. Leland, I understand the severity of what I'm asking for. I know that the Joker is an extremely dangerous and high profile case, which is why I also understand why you may have qualms about me treating him; but I really think that I can do this. The reason I came to this facility was so that I can treat the criminally insane. The patients in these files are by no means near the level of illness that I was looking forward to treating. If I wanted to treat harmless patients like these, I would have gone to another facility. I feel that it is my duty to work with those who others have given up on. And who fits this bill better than the Joker? Lots of people believe that he's untreatable; but I want to prove them wrong. Dr. Leland, if you let me have the Joker as my patient I _know_ that I can cure him. You at least have to give me the chance to try, right?" I smile hopefully. Dr. Leland is speechless for a long moment.

"Umm… Goodness, Dr. Quinzel. I was not expecting you to ask that." She places a hand on her forehead to steady herself. Another long moment passes as she contemplates her response to everything that I just said. "Well, first of all, I would like to say that I admire your passion and enthusiasm for this work, but I wonder if these qualities are clouding your judgment on the extreme level of difficulty that treating someone like the Joker would be. He's no picnic Harleen. If we were to assign him as your patient, treating him would not be a cake walk. We have had countless of doctors and specialists fly in and attempt to do the very thing that you believe you can accomplish. None of them have succeeded. None of them have even been able to extract basic information from him; such as his real name. Not only would your level of expertise for this case have to be considered, but also your personal safety. Many doctors who attempt to treat the Joker don't come out the same as they were before. The only ones who do are those that quit after the first day; and they're still pretty shaken up from the experience. He has a way of getting inside people's heads. He can easily flip a session so that you are the one releasing information about yourself rather than him. And… there are also doctors who don't survive sessions with him. He has killed many of our employees and sent others to the hospital with severe injuries. So, I can tell you right now Dr. Quinzel that your request is unfortunately going to have to be denied. At least for right now. Dr. Arkham has made it very clear that he wants you to gradually earn your standing here, so I know for a fact that a request for a higher profile case would be immediately denied for the time being." I can't help the look of disappointment that floods my face. "But don't worry. With your level of enthusiasm, I'm sure that you'll have a patient on the same level as the Joker by the end of the year." What? A whole year? And I notice how she said 'a patient on the same level as the Joker' and not 'the actual Joker.' Ugh, I don't want to wait that long! What if he hurts other people during this time? I want to start treating him now before he gets the chance to. I wish I could tell her the reason why I know I'll be able to treat him, but if I did that then they definitely won't let me because doctors aren't allowed to treat patients that they are close to.

With a heavy heart, I reluctantly agree to Dr. Leland's reasoning. Mostly because I have no idea how to rebuttal everything she's said. I randomly choose two patients from the files she brought me. I don't really have to put much thought into who I choose anyway because I'll have them treated in no time so that I can move my way up the ranks. Dr. Leland wishes me good luck with my new patients before she leaves and I get right back to work on my stack of paperwork.

By three o'clock I've finished everything and I'm finally ready to bring my two stacks down to human resources. I couldn't manage taking everything in one trip, so I had to come back to my office for what was left behind. I hold the hefty stack of papers close as I make the long walk down to the human resources office. Every step I take in these black stilettos echoes loudly throughout each hallway I stride through. I always feel empowered whenever I wear these heels; they're really helping boost my mood right now. I had a feeling that I would be denied having the Joker as my patient before I even asked, but I guess I just got too caught up in the idea of meeting my soulmate that I didn't think about _who_ I was asking to treat. It's unnerving thinking about how we're both under the same roof right now, and I can't see him. I really want to meet him face to face and have a proper conversation with him. I'm so impatient to figure out why he and I are meant to be together. I wish I could poke my head in maximum security just so that I could get a little peek of him up close, but security would never let me through their gates because I have no business being there. I wonder if there's a way that I could-

"OW!" I shriek. When I turned the corner at the end of the corridor, I bumped into something and my head smashed into whatever it was.

"Oh shit, I'm so sorry!" A man in a lab coat is crouching before me, helping to gather all of my scattered paperwork. I can't make out who he is because of his awkward position.

"No, please. I'm the one who should be sorry. I was in my own head; I didn't see you coming." When he finishes putting together my papers, he rises to hand them to me. My lips stretch into a wide grin when I recognize who it is.

"Guy!"

"Harleen?" Guy's excitement exceeds my own as he wraps me in a bear hug and swings me around once. Guy's reaction is a bit over the top, but his enthusiasm is infectious and I can't help feeling super happy to see him too.

"I can't believe this! What are you doing here? I thought you flew out to Metropolis with Danny."

"Eh, I changed my mind last minute. I wanted to surprise you."

"Well you sure as hell did a damn good job! Tell me, did you also plan this little reunion we just had?" I can't help the loud laugh that escapes my throat. Guy has always had a strange way of keeping me in a great humor.

"Of course I did. Getting a concussion was part of my plan too," I wink playfully. Guy laughs and walks the rest of the way with me to human resources.

"Wow, so you work here too now?" Guy asks.

"E-yup," I lightly pop the 'p' sound.

"I still can't believe this," Guy grins. "After all the times I begged you and the others to stay in Gotham, you finally listened."

I scoff. "Who says you were the one who convinced me to stay?"

"Harleen please. We both know you didn't leave because of me. If it wasn't my words that moved you, then it was my body right? You just couldn't stay away." Guy smiles his famous wolfish grin. I laugh and nudge his shoulder.

"Uh, yeah Guy. That's why I stayed." I grab his cheek and pinch it a bit roughly. "Because I'd miss you so, so much!" I say in the best mommy voice that I can manage.

"Ouch." Guy rubs his cheek. "Maybe you working here isn't such a good idea after all."

I'm laughing very unprofessionally when we reach the human resources office. I turn in my paperwork to the man behind the desk and officially have nothing left to do for the rest of the day.

"So Guy I'm done for the day, do you want to go out for a bite?"

"Hell yeah I do. I turned in all of my paperwork already so I'm done too. We should go to that one bar 'n' grill we all went to that one time. Remember?"

I roll my eyes. "Yeah those details you're giving me are really helpful. But I do know what you're talking about, so let's go there."

Guy and I clock out of the asylum and head over to the restaurant. I'm relieved that we don't have to take the bus to get there. Unlike me, Guy actually has a car that safely gets him to work and home every day. It takes twenty minutes to get to the restaurant and Guy and I laugh and tease each other the whole way there. I love Guy. I don't love-love him in the romantic sense. I just love him. He's like the older brother I've always wanted.

We both slide into our booth and order drinks and appetizers. There's a football game being played on all of the TVs. It seems like a pretty important game too because this place is crowded and everyone's eyes are glued to the TVs. I wish I could join in on everyone's excitement but I don't know a thing about football. I wish I did.

Guy throws a french fry in my face to pull my focus from the TV back to him. I playfully scowl at him and throw it back.

"So Harleen, I'm really curious. Why did you decide to stay and work at Arkham?" I was really hoping he wouldn't ask that. I'm obviously not going to tell him the real reason why I'm working there, so I just stick with what I told Dr. Leland.

"Well, I've always had a thing for extreme personalities. You can't deny there's an element of glamour to the super criminals they've got at Arkham. I wouldn't be able to work with people like that at S.T.A.R. Labs; I'd be doing boring research stuff every day. I guess you could say that reality hit me last minute and I realized where it is I'm supposed to be."

"I'm glad you decided to stay. I can't tell you how sad I was having all of my friends leave me."

"Aw come on Guy, you could make a whole new group of friends in two seconds if you wanted to."

He shakes his head. "No I couldn't; not at Arkham. Have you met the other doctors? Everyone is so serious. I feel like if I were to goof around with them, they would think that I don't take my work seriously enough."

"Hmm, you've got a point there. Everyone there is so professional-like. It's refreshing to me but I'm sure it'll get boring after a while."

 _Heheheeeheeeheehehahahahahahaha!_

The sound of the Joker's laugh makes me jolt up in attention. It's been a while since I've heard anything from him. It's understandable though. The joy from his latest crusade had long worn off, and there isn't anything happening at the asylum that could make him feel anything strong enough for me to hear him. I wonder why he's laughing now. If I concentrate hard enough, I can sort of feel the emotions behind it. Something about the way he's laughing now feels masochistic. It's almost as if he's in some sort of pain, but that very same pain is egging him on. I don't get it.

"Something wrong Harleen?" Guy breaks my concentration.

"Huh? No. No, I'm fine."

"Were you listening to your other voice just now?"

I smile guiltily. "Yeah, sorry. I know you were in the middle of saying something."

"No it's cool. I get it. Sometimes it's really hard to focus on reality when their thoughts suddenly come to mind. I usually don't hear my girl till its past nine p.m. I wonder if it's because she lives in a different time zone or because she works late. I hope it's the first."

I laugh. "I'm sure she's a good girl Guy. If she's working late, I'm sure the job is decent."

"Yeah, I can feel that she's a good person, but there are only so many jobs that a woman can do at night, you know?"

"Tell me about it; it's tough out there. I remember bartending late nights during my undergrad, and every night I had trouble with sleazy guys. Eventually my boss got tired of me complaining so he let me go. …Asshole." I swig a chug of my beer. "But don't worry Guy. If your soulmate was working a bad or degrading job, trust me, you'd know about it. You would be hearing her complain about it all the time. I'm sure your first guess was right and she just lives in a different time zone."

Guy smiles warmly and looks a bit relieved. "Thanks Harleen. I'm sorry to hear about that other stuff though."

"Eh, it's in the past. I only had to put up with it when I was working. Afterwards I would just run to my car and drive home quickly." I sigh and lean my head into my hand. "I wish I still had my car. Getting around town was so much simpler."

"What, you don't like taking the 'L' train?"

"To be honest, I don't mind taking the train, it's getting there that's a drag. I hate walking through my neighborhood, it's dangerous. I keep my fist in my pocket with my keys between my knuckles each time I leave my place. I was looking forward to moving to Metropolis because I was going to live in a better neighborhood."

"Living in Metropolis is expensive though. How were you going to manage that?"

"Daniel and I were talking about moving in together for a while."

"Really? I didn't know that."

"Yeah well, it wasn't exactly a solid plan; it was just a thought." Guy is silent when our waitress arrives with our meals. He seems deep in thought so I decide not to bother him. After a good minute, Guy slams his hand on the table and regards me with a triumphant smile.

"I've got it! The answer to all of your problems." I furrow my eyebrows in confusion.

"Huh? What are you talking about?"

"You hate where you're living right now, right?"

"Hell yeah I do."

"Then the solution to your problem is obvious."

I wait for his answer but he says nothing. "It isn't obvious to me Guy. What are you talking about?"

Guy wears a proud smile. "Harleen. You and I should move in together." I stare at him in wonder.

"Are you serious?"

"Hell yeah I am! If you were comfortable enough to move in with Daniel, then you'd be comfortable enough to move in with me right? Together we could afford a better place closer to the uptown district; it'd be a lot safer than where you're living now. And plus, I would love to have a roommate right now. The silence in my apartment is getting to me. And who better to room with than you Harleen. You're like a sister to me, I would love to have you around more."

My heart swells. "Aw Guy I would love to live with you too; if you'll have me. I think of you as the brother I've always wanted. Are you sure about this though? I mean this is huge."

"Of course I'm sure. Let's do this!"

"Really?"

"Really." Guy and I clink glasses and laugh the night away.

* * *

Last night was so much fun. Guy and I played some pool for a while after eating. We stood out a bit later than we should have, considering the fact that we both had to work early the next day. Guy is so sweet, he offered to carpool to work every day even though we don't live together yet. I wanted to decline because I live a bit out of his way, but I just couldn't pass up this opportunity. I love getting a ride to work.

So far the day has gone by quickly. I had my first session with my first patient today. He was a jumpy man with a serious case of anxiety. I was supposed to have my session with my second patient thirty minutes ago, but apparently he got caught in an incident in the cafeteria that sent him to the medical ward. I believe he was stabbed in the arm with a fork by one of the more ill patients. I was planning on calling it a day, but then I decide against it. I think it'd be best to at least introduce myself to him today. That way I can establish a level of trust sooner rather than later.

I walk purposefully to the medical ward; my heels clicking repeatedly against the linoleum floor. I push open the large double doors and observe my new surroundings curiously. This is my first time stepping foot into this part of the asylum. It's very white. It definitely has that hospital feel to it though. The patients here don't have the luxury of privacy like patients in a hospital have. There are large glass windows that take up the entire entrance wall to each room. Most of these rooms don't even have doors, there's just a big gap where the door used to be. I'd hate to be admitted here.

I pass a long row of patient-filled rooms to get to the help desk. I see and hear a lot of disturbing things that I don't care to dwell on. When I reach the desk, I find that it's empty. The nurse must have stepped out for a second. I decide to wait for her return because I need help locating my new patient. I don't know what he looks like so I can't exactly poke my head in every room until I find him.

I start playing with a stack of papers that have been left out. My fingers gently strum each page as the minutes go by. What is taking her so long? I turn away from the desk to see if I can see her coming down the hall; there's no sign of her. I sigh loudly, making my annoyance obvious. When I turn to look at the other side of the room, I learn that there are some patient rooms lined on the far wall. The desk is positioned in a way that allows whoever is working here to keep a watchful eye on these patients at all times. These rooms are not empty, so I don't know why no one is here doing their job. My eyes quickly peer through each patient's window when I suddenly catch a glimpse of green hair.

…I don't believe it…

…There he is.

It's him.

It's actually him.

The Joker is sitting right there!

I stare at him dumbfounded. I can't believe I'm seeing him in the flesh right now. My heart feels like it's going to beat out of my chest. An unexpected surge of both calm and excitement floods through me. I let out a shaky relieved breath. I finally found him! To my surprise, I'm extremely happy to see him. It feels as if my whole life has been building up to this moment. I can feel my heart swelling and I feel a strong urge to go to him. I take one step towards him but stop myself dead in my tracks. What am I doing? I can't just walk up to him like nothing. What would I say? Oh jeez. I'm really nervous now.

I allow myself to stare at him while I decide what to do. The Joker doesn't notice me at all right now. He's too busy picking at the bandage that's wrapped around his left arm. He's staring at it questionably as if he's debating whether to leave it on or not. I notice from the opening of his jumpsuit that he has quite a few tattoos. Unfortunately from here I can't make out what they are. I think I also see something across his forehead but I can't make out what that is either. You can tell that his hair has been hastily smoothed back because there are a couple of loose strands out of place. I notice that long handcuffs are secured around each wrist, and the other end is attached to either side of the bed he's sitting on. The right side of his forehead is a deep purple; it looks badly bruised. His eyes reveal his sleep deprivation. He looks like he hasn't slept in months. His eyes are underlined by deep black rings that really stand out against his alabaster skin. His eyes are a clouded blue that hold mine captive for a good two minutes.

Suddenly, the Joker notices me staring at him. When his eyes meet my own, every nerve in my body jolts at the attention. At first I feel so comfortable and at ease under his scrutiny, but then, an unbridled fear takes over as I notice the way he's staring back at me. His entire demeanor becomes deathly cold as he perceives me. He looks me dead in the eyes without moving or blinking. He's become so frightening that I feel as if I'm looking death itself in the face. I quickly turn away and lean against the desk, my back to him.

I cannot believe how shook up I am by just looking at him. If I break this easily under his stare, how am I going to survive a session with him? He's more intimidating than I thought… but I won't let him get to me; I can't let him. I need to be strong.

Slowly, I turn my head around so that I can get a peek of him. He isn't looking at me anymore. He went back to playing with his bandage. I look away before he can glare at me again.

Wow. I feel like such a chicken! I need to pull myself together. I don't want to come off as weak right off the bat. I need to stay calm and focus on channeling positive emotions. I don't want to let him intimidate me but most importantly, I don't want him to see me being intimidated. So, I take a few relaxing breaths to slow my heart and I decide to act nonchalant about his presence. I pretend to be interested in the papers I was messing with earlier, when I hear footsteps coming down the hall. It's about time this nurse returned to her station.

Huh? It's Guy.

"What are you doing here?" I ask.

"Actually, I was coming here to tell you that they moved your patient back to his cell while you were on your way up here."

"Ugh, really. Just my luck," I roll my eyes. "I feel guilty leaving though. No one's here to keep an eye on these patients."

"Yeah, that's the second reason why I'm here." I stare at Guy questionably. "On my way in a couple of nurses were gathered outside the door. They're afraid to be around him." Guy points his finger in the Joker's direction. He's still fiddling with his bandage. I look back at Guy and laugh. His comment really relieves me. Yes, I'll admit that his presence sends shivers down my spine, but at least I'm brave enough to stand in the same room as him. I feel better because now I know that I'm on a different level than everyone else when it comes to the Joker.

"Why are you laughing?" Guy smiles, not understanding.

I start coming down from my laughing high. "Because they're all chickens!" Guy joins in my laughter before my high runs out.

I wipe away a couple of loose tears and sigh. "Well I guess I should go find my patient and introduce myself. Are you going to stay here and keep guard or something?"

"Yeah, just until the orderlies come. The nurses won't come in until they arrive. Right now they're finishing up getting things in order in the cafeteria after this morning's incident."

"Well, all right. I'll see you later Guy." As I walk away I decide to throw a quick glance the Joker's way and I'm surprised to find that he's looking back at me. He isn't glaring coldly at me like he was before, however, his gaze is still intense. There's a little wrinkled 'v' in between the place where his eyebrows should be. He's looking hard at me, as if he's trying to figure me out.

In a moment of confidence, I smile and give the Joker a single acknowledging nod while walking away towards the door. I don't want him to think that I'm just like everybody else. I want him to know that to me, he's just another patient; even though he's really so much more than that. With my hands in my coat and my stilettos clicking away with every step, I leave the medical ward feeling triumphant; as though I've just won some sort of battle.

* * *

 **AN: I swear I was going to post this chapter a lot sooner but my midterms got in the way. This chapter is double the size of the other chapters though, so I hope that makes up for my tardiness. Hope you all like the story so far! Let me know what you think, I'll see you all in the next chapter. :D**


	4. Fighting Boredom

**Chapter Four:**

 **Fighting Boredom**

One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty, twenty one, twenty two, twenty three, twenty four, twenty five, twenty six, twenty seven, twenty eight, twenty nine, thirty, thirty one, thirty two, thirty three, thirty four, thirty five, thirty six, thirty seven, thirty eight, thirty nine, forty, forty one, forty two, forty three, forty four, forty five, forty six, forty seven, forty eight, forty nine, fifty, fifty one, fifty two, fifty three, fifty four, fifty five, fifty six, fifty seven…

Hmmm… Fifty seven huh. That's about fourteen months. Not fourteen months straight but that's still how long I've been in here; tucked away inside these four blank walls, like a prisoner. Of course no one around here dares to use the term prisoner. It has all of these negative connotations to it. No, these people actually like to refer to us as patients!

"Hahahahahaahaha!" God, these doctors are funny. _I'm_ not the one who needs help around here; if you ask me. But of course, no one bothers to listen to the ramblings of a mad man. None of these white coats wants to hear the philosophy that drives the man, until they've heard how he came about the philosophy. And that is something I'll never tell. So no one will ever listen to me… unless I force them to. I think my little dynamic demonstration really let people know what I'm about. Too bad Bats had to spoil the fun. He didn't let me demonstrate my complete message to the citizens of Gotham. And they would have loved it too. Trust me, my exhibition would have left everyone grinning from ear to ear.

Oh, I can't wait to play with those _good_ civilians again. Next time, I'll be sure to cause a riot of fun. But, in the meantime, I'll just sit here and let my next scheme brew. I'm no one trick pony. Everything I do has to be unique and thought out; and I hatch all of my best plans here at Arkham. These people are so ignorant to their positions in the deck, that I find them all to be great inspirations to me. You know, the real looneys here are the ones who don't even realize how looney they are. That's why these doctors are so much fun! They have no idea how lost they really are.

Unfortunately, I haven't properly seen a single doctor since I've been here. What's a guy got to do to get some attention around here? Killing someone will only send them running to the other guy and away from me. So I guess there's only one thing that I can do…

I bang my head roughly against the wall. "Hahahahahahaha!" This'll get me the attention I deserve. I smile wickedly and proceed to bang up whatever part of me I can against the wall. "Hahahahahahahahahaaha!"

* * *

"Hey, watch it doc, you're hurting my arm." The doctor wraps a bandage around my left arm with trembling hands. She finishes her job as quickly as possible and practically runs out of the room. I laugh to myself and yell after her. "Honestly I don't know what you're afraid of. I'm chained to this bed, what can I do?" I smile slowly when she looks at me one last time with those wide, frightened eyes. The doctors here are just too funny! The nurses are even funnier. They cleared the room even faster than the doctors did.

Oh well. I don't mind spending time in the medical ward. The screaming coming from the other patients makes me feel at home. Only now I'm bored again…

I look down at my bandaged arm. This doctor really wrapped this bandage as tight as she could; I think I feel my hand going numb. "Hahahahaha!" Was she intentionally trying to hurt me? _Tsk, tsk, tsk._ This is going to cost her dearly.

I start picking at the edges of the bandage. I'm unsure of whether to leave it on or not. I want it off because I hate bandages, but I'm liking this painful numb feeling that's it's giving me. As I contemplate what to do I hear a pair of heels coming down the hall. I wonder if the doc has come back. I've got a bone to pick with her; or more like one to pick out of her. I feel like ripping out one of her ribs. I'm a resourceful man, I could do it with whatever I can find in this room or on her person.

When I look up to see who it is, I'm instantly disappointed. It's just some blonde waiting for the nurse at the desk. She doesn't notice me sitting here. I focus on picking at my bandage again. I'm still unsure about leaving it on or not. I hate the idea of having to wear it. Suddenly, I feel eyes burning into my skull. When I look up I see that blonde staring at me. Why the hell is she gawking at me like an idiot? I feel like a zoo animal. Does she think just because I'm behind glass she's safe to stare at me?

I decide to stare back at her as coldly as I can. I bore my eyes into hers without blinking. This'll make her rethink how _safe_ she is. Her face changes into one of fright and she immediately turns her back to me. …Yeah. That's what I thought.

I go back to picking at my bandage. I'm thinking I'll leave it on. I want that doctor to see what she's done to me. I'll take it off when my arm starts turning purple because I'm not stupid enough to lose my arm over teaching somebody a lesson. When I try loosening the edges of the bandage, I hear the blondie conversing with someone. I don't bother to see what's going on because I know she isn't talking to the doc. I would have heard her coming in those loud heels of hers.

 ** _"_** ** _Hahahahhahahaha!"_**

That laugh. That didn't come from my head did it? I look up and see that the blonde is laughing her lungs out. I've heard this laugh only a couple of times before. Could she be- No. That's not possible. I don't have one. Sure I've heard a woman giggling in my head a couple of times but I've never paid much mind to it. It was just one of the many voices that I hear in my skull. I've never considered the possibility that someone out there exists for me.

I stare at her confused. Could she really be who I think she is? As she walks away she looks at me again and this time she smiles and gives me a quick nod. For a moment, I see a flash of potential in her smile. Could she really be the one? Maybe she is. Maybe she isn't. Either way, I know exactly what I'll be doing for the next couple of weeks. I smile vibrantly as I explore the new possibilities that this blonde doctor presents me.

* * *

 **AN: Sorry about the super short chapter, but I really wanted to post something and I didn't want The Joker to reveal too much of what's coming next. I hope you all liked him by the way, he isn't easy to write. I promise you though, he's going to get more interesting. I'm super excited to start writing his interactions with Harleen! I can't wait for them to finally meet officially; it's gonna be fun. :)**

 **Feel free to leave reviews! They're like fuel to me; they keep me going! I'll see you all in the next chapter. :D**


	5. Sudden Interest

**Chapter Five:**

 **Sudden Interest**

I've had three weeks of building a fundamental trust between my patients and me. So far, I'd say that they have begun to think of me as their friend, rather than their psychiatrist. This is good. This is going to make treating them a faster and smoother process; which is exactly the course I need to be taking right now. I need to work my way up to the Joker A.S.A.P. My only encounter with him wasn't even a real encounter. We didn't greet each other, exchange pleasantries, or even speak to each other. I will admit though that I'm grateful that I haven't run into him again. I need to build up my level of confidence a little more before I see him again. I don't want to crack under that piercing glare again.

On a lighter note, Guy and I have been hanging out almost every day for the past couple of weeks. We just started apartment hunting online and I'm really excited to start checking these places out in person. Living in the uptown district is going to be so refreshing. They've got nicer buildings, cleaner streets, and friendlier neighbors. Not to mention that once Guy and I live together, I'll have a guaranteed ride to work every day. I can't wait!

So far, this Tuesday morning has gone by rather quickly. I finished my morning session with my jitterbug patient and my mouth has run dry with all of the excessive reassurances and promises that I had to make. My little jitterbug is my favorite patient; but boy does he love to hear me talk. I would like to carry a bottle of water with me during my sessions with him, but he's afraid and disgusted by the idea that I might suddenly spew water on him. I've assured him that that scenario is extremely unlikely to ever happen because honestly, that's something that people do on purpose and I would never do that to him. But of course, I agreed to his request because I don't want him to perceive me as a possible threat to his comfort.

As soon as I leave the therapy room I head straight to the water cooler in the staff room. I tuck my patient's files in my underarm and serve myself as many cups of water as I need to quench my thirst. These water coolers always carry the tiniest cups; I'm probably on my twelfth refill right now. When my chugging has finally calmed into casual sips, I notice Lyle Bolton lurking my way. He's a pretty built guy who styles a purposefully bald head that makes him look tougher than he really is. I've been chatting with Lyle every now and then because I heard that he's one of the orderlies in charge of keeping the Joker in line. I figure it's a good idea to have this connection so that I can know how the Joker is doing during this time where I can't see him.

Lyle walks up to the water cooler and leans in to serve himself a small cup of water. "Morning Harleen. How're you doing?"

"I'm good Lyle. You?"

He lets out a long sigh. "I can't wait to get this day over with."

"Oh? You have plans later or what?"

"Nah. The clown got a new shrink today and it's always a pain trying to get him to get with the program, you know?"

My eyes widen and my voice comes out a higher pitch than I meant it to. "What?" When Lyle sees my distress I immediately compose myself and try to act like that news didn't affect me as much as it did. "Who's treating him?"

"Dunno. Some bigshot who flew in from L.A., I think." Ugh, seriously? If this doctor is any good, then he/she might screw up my chances of meeting the Joker. Without meaning to I voice my thoughts to myself. "Ugh, they really have to stop sending doctors to see him."

"I know right." Lyle butts in. "I mean the guy's untreatable. Doesn't anybody get that?" That is not what I meant, but I ignore it because I'm not going to explain what I really meant.

I squeeze my empty paper cup in my grip and toss it in the recycling bin. "Well I'll see you around Lyle, I have another patient to see."

"See ya."

I walk away and head to my office to grab my second patient's files. I'm not going to think too much about what Lyle told me. I mean, it's just like Dr. Leland said, the Joker has gone through countless doctors and none of them have accomplished anything. Why should this one be any different?

Ugh… I still can't help feeling these faint nervous pangs in my chest. What if this doctor is _really_ good…?

Nope! I said I wasn't going to think about this, so I'm not. I grab my files and leave to go find my other patient. I need to keep myself busy so that my mind doesn't go in circles.

* * *

By one o'clock I am done for the day. I return to my office and plop myself in my comfy office chair. I kick up my feet on my desk and close my eyes for a while. I'm not exactly tired but I've got nothing better to do. I have half an hour to kill while Guy finishes his last session. He said that he would take me home today if I waited for him; so that's what I'm going to do.

I sort of feel a little guilty always depending on Guy for a ride because he does go a little out of his way for me. I'm comforted by the thought that things will be easier once we live together because then, getting a ride would be a matter of convenience, since we're both coming and going to the same places.

I wonder which apartment we'll end up choosing. I can't wait to go see them in person. Guy has put me in charge of decorating the communal rooms because he says that he doesn't have a decorative bone in his body. I already have some ideas of what I want certain spaces to look like but my creative skills have to be limited to what we both already have. We can't exactly go to Ikea and buy a whole new furniture set right now. We both have tons of student loans that we have to worry about paying off first. So I want to choose a place that works best with everything that we have. We both have a lot of stuff that we don't want to get rid of, so the apartment is going to have to be spacious. I initially thought that we would be looking at two room apartments, but Guy insists that we check out three room apartments instead. He says he wants the third room to be his man-cave. Even now I'm rolling my eyes just as I did when I first heard his idea. Guy can be such a guy sometimes; I softly laugh to myself.

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHEEHEHEEHEEEHHEE!_**

Well, well, well, Mr. Joker, long time, no hear. I wonder what has set off his laugh of hysterics this time-

Wait a minute. I immediately sit upright in my chair. He's meeting that new doctor today; possibly right now. I wonder if the hotshot doctor has put him in a good mood.

Oh no. That better not be the case. If the Joker likes this doctor, then he'll start opening up to him; and where does that leave me? On the sidelines watching someone else doing the job that rightfully belongs to me. I am not going to sit by and be left twisted in the wind while someone else just waltz in and takes what I'm working so hard for.

But wait a minute… Now that I'm paying more attention to it, his laughter isn't exactly being produced through joy. It sounds malicious. I decide to focus on it harder. I want to know what's going on. I can sort of hear an undertone of distorted whispers. This isn't the first time I hear them. I can never make sense of them so I always give up listening to them. I'm not going to do that this time though. I really want to know what's going on. I let the whispers over power his laughter and try to find some coherence among the madness. The whispers grow louder and louder until their reverberations start to cause strong throbs of pain in my head. To my surprise, I can feel a liquid dripping slowly out of one of my nostrils; but I don't bother with it because I don't want to lose my focus. Still, I listen on, until one voice rises above the others. A loud, agitated, and desperate voice.

 ** _Who is she? Who is she? Who is she? Who is she? Who is she? Who is she?_**

My eyes slowly dilate at the sound of his voice. It's so rare for me to hear him actually say something. But what does he mean? Who is he talking about? Is he asking about that new doctor? Is that doctor a woman?

My concentration is broken when Guy opens my office door.

"Hey Harleen, you ready to g-" Guy freezes when his eyes finally rest on my face. He grabs a tissue and immediately pats at the liquid running down my nose. "Jesus Harleen, what happened?" I grab the tissue from him and finish cleaning myself up. I guess there are consequences to getting into the Joker's mind. I stare at the red stained tissue and wonder if this is the highest price to be paid for peeking into his thoughts.

"Harleen?" Guy brings my attention back to him.

"Oh, I'm sorry Guy. I was just thinking too hard I guess," I laugh half-heartedly.

"No one gets like that from thinking too hard."

"Guy, relax. You're looking too much into this; it was just a simple nose bleed."

"Are you sure?"

"Of course I am."

Guy looks at me for a good second before he gives up. "Okay. If you say so."

"Are you done for the day?" I ask.

"Yeah. You ready to go?"

"Yup." I hang up my lab coat and walk out of the door with Guy.

* * *

I stood up way too late last night. After visiting the apartments with Guy we decided to make a decision that same day. It took some great consideration, but we finally chose the best place for us. Unfortunately though, we had to pay the consequences for that decision this morning. We both woke up late. I tried to convince Guy to forget about picking me up this morning but he insisted because he said that he was already running late anyways. When we finally arrived at the Asylum, I went straight to the therapy room to see my first patient because I know that his severe case of anxiety would be tormenting his poor head with all kinds of terrible reasons as to why I wasn't there when I should be. After apologizing and giving him a brief explanation our session together continues without a hitch.

Afterwards, I decide to go down to the staff room and have myself a cup of coffee. I need caffeine to get me through the rest of the day. The staff room is fairly large and right now it's pretty full with nurses and orderlies sitting, eating, and chatting in several tables. I wait my turn to pour myself a cup from the coffee maker's pitcher. When I'm done, I find Dr. Leland waiting in line behind me. She smiles at me.

"Good morning Harleen."

"Good morning. How are you today?"

I move to the side to let Dr. Leland fill her cup. "I'm good, thank you for asking. And you?"

"I'm hoping this cup 'o' Joe will get me through the rest of this day." I smile into my cup. Dr. Leland laughs.

"I know what you mean." For a moment, Dr. Leland and I focus on drinking our coffee. We stand near the sink and lean our bottoms against the counter. It feels like we're charging ourselves up with enough energy to get us through the day.

"So Harleen, I've been meaning to ask you about your thoughts on yesterday's incident."

"I'm sorry? Yesterday's incident?"

"Yes, regarding patient 4479." My look of confusions stays pinned on my face. I don't know what patient she's talking about.

"You know-" Dr. Leland lowers her voice. "The Joker."

"Oh! I'm sorry I wasn't familiar with his identification number until now. What about him? What happened?"

"Oh, so you haven't heard. Well, did you know that Dr. Arkham brought in a new doctor from L.A. yesterday?"

"Yes. To oversee the Joker's treatment correct?"

"Mhmm. Yesterday, Dr. Boris had his first session with patient 4479 and… well… let's just say that Dr. Boris will not be working here any longer."

"My goodness, what happened?"

"Oh Harleen, it was awful. The Joker turned the man into a vegetable. He beat him senselessly." Oh. My. Gosh. This is exactly what I wanted to prevent! I don't want him to hurt anyone anymore. I need to put a stop to this behavior. "I hope this serves as a lesson to you Harleen. You need to abandon the idea of treating him. Patient 4479 has no self-control. When he gets the chance, he _will_ hurt you Harleen." I should have known that's where she was going with this.

"Dr. Leland I appreciate your concern but I believe that that patient needs me now more than ever. If I could just get the chance to have a single meeting with him, I _know_ that I could get through to him somehow."

Dr. Leland exhales a deep, long sigh and gives me a very tired look. "Dr. Quinzel you are very stubborn. Don't you understand that that man could be the death of you? I care about you. You're young and fresh on the block; and you have a passion for this unlike anything I've ever seen. I just-" Dr. Leland pauses for a moment. "I've seen that man destroy some of my best colleagues. I would hate to see him do that to you."

I'm a bit taken aback by Dr. Leland's concern. I can't imagine everything that she has had to endure because of the Joker. And I suppose there is truth in the fact that I shouldn't be so naïve as to think that this connection that I have with him will guarantee my protection. I guess there is a lesson to be learned here. I'm sure as hell not going to give this up; but, I will practice as much caution as possible.

"I'm so sorry to hear that Joan. I really appreciate you looking out for me." I give her a reassuring smile and gently squeeze her shoulder before excusing myself to go see my next patient. My resolve to become the Joker's psychiatrist hasn't changed the least bit by what Dr. Leland said. Of course now I realize that I have to be really careful about how I do this. For now though, I have to focus on treating the patients that I have now so that I can get closer to him.

* * *

After completing another great session, it's time for the worst part of my week: Progress reports. I simply have to fill out a series of paperwork and log in this week's progress with my patients. It lets the higher-ups know that I'm doing my job and doing a good job of it. I pick up the report forms and head to my office for the first time today. I arrived so late this morning, that I never had time to settle into it today.

I stroll through the halls and my pony tail swings with every step I take. Without thinking about it, I start whistling that one tune from Kill Bill. I watched the movie the other day and I guess the tune just stuck. I jollily whistle my tune until I reach my office door where it slowly fades into silence when I see that the door is ajar. It should be locked; I haven't come in here today.

I open the door slowly and tentatively poke my head in to take a look around. No one is in here and everything looks the same… except for those flowers sitting on my desk. I step inside my office and shut the door behind me, my eyes never leaving the flowers. It's a small stunning bouquet of purple and red roses. I can't keep this smile from my face. No one's ever given me flowers before. I wonder who it's from. I grab the bouquet and bring it up to nose. The scent seems a bit off; shouldn't flowers have a sweeter aroma than this. This scent is sour on my nose, and it's kind of strong. When I put the bouquet back down, I find a small card hidden beneath the petals. It's an odd, red clowned joker's wild playing card. I freeze when I read the message written on the other side of it.

 _Hey doc, why don't you come down and see me sometime? –J_

Oh. Crap.

Is this from who I think it's from?

J?

Is this from the Joker? Did he actually send me these? My lips tug at the corners. I guess I must have left an impression on him the other week in the medical ward.

My smile quickly fades. How on Earth did he get this in here? My head whips around the room to find any indication of a break in or some clues as to how someone might have gotten in here. Is he leaving his cell or did he have someone else put this here? How the hell did he figure out who I am? I never introduced myself. I should probably report this. I should tell his orderlies about this and have them increase his security. If he can get out of his cell than who's to say that _he_ won't be the one standing in here waiting for me next time. And who knows what he'll do to me? I mean, I do want to meet him but on my terms, not his. That man is capable of everything and after Dr. Leland's warning today, I believe him to be completely capable of gutting me like a fish. He doesn't even know that we're soulmates, so of course he would hurt me without a second thought. He probably thinks that I'm his new plaything and this is all just a joke to him. I mean, they don't call him the Joker for nothing right?

Ugh, what should I do?! A part of me doesn't want to report this. I sort of feel like I'm betraying him or something; which is absolutely ridiculous because I've never even spoken to the guy before! We have no bond of trust for me to break in the first place. But then again, this is probably his attempt to establish one with me and if I screw this up, I could wreck any chance I have on being on his good side. But how does he expect someone like me to react to something like this? Did he honestly believe that I would stay quiet about this? It's part of my job to report things like this. Is he testing me? Crap, I don't want to disappoint him. For some reason, the thought of failing him irritates me; but feeling this way irritates me even more. I've never met this man and he already has a way of making me feel weird emotions. I wonder if this is a typical soulmate thing.

I plop myself in my chair and fold my arms on my desk resting my head over them. My eyes remain fixated on the bouquet while I contemplate what actions need to be made. I stay this way for a while until I finally come up with a conclusion. I'm going to do, what I'm expected to do. I've decided that I'm going to report this to Dr. Arkham personally. I don't want to let my curiosity compromise my personal safety. I'm really interested in what would happen if I turned a blind eye to this, but I don't want to be naïve and expect not to get burned if I do. No, I'm definitely going to be smart about this. I'm a doctor. I'm a professional. I will not tolerate this behavior; my position here forbids it.

* * *

Outside of Dr. Arkham's office, it takes me another brief moment to decide once again, if this is what I should be doing or not. I tentatively knock on his door to announce myself. "Excuse me, Dr. Arkham. Do you have a moment?"

A black silhouette grows darker and larger until the door's bronze knob turns to reveal a weary Jeremiah Arkham. "Good afternoon Dr. Quinzel. Please, come in." He steps to the side and closes the door after me. I take my seat before I'm asked to. Dr. Arkham shuffles around his desk to take his seat opposite me. "So Dr. Quinzel, how can I help you today?"

"I have some concerns regarding patient 4479."

"Oh? Has something happened?"

"Yes, actually. I found a bouquet of flowers in my office today with this in it." I hand him the wild card with Joker's message on it. Dr. Arkham's eyes skate quickly across the message before his focus returns to me. "I think the Joker sent them."

Dr. Arkham releases a heavy sigh. "Unfortunately, I don't doubt that he did." With eyebrows furrowed in frustration, Dr. Arkham leans back in his chair and runs his hands furiously through his hair. "I don't know what to do with him anymore."

"You must have your hands full with him. I heard what happened yesterday."

Dr. Arkham chuckles darkly. "Who hasn't heard? I am up to my neck in paperwork and I am out of solutions for patient 4479." He says the Joker's identification number with disdain. This man is clearly being pushed to his limit. Having the Joker in the asylum is obviously making his job much more difficult than it already is. The poor guy looks like he could use a long vacation; which he, unfortunately, can never take because who else would run the asylum?

I feel sorry for him. I really do. But, I can't ignore the opportunity that this situation is presenting me with. "Dr. Arkham, perhaps I could help lighten your work-load; let me handle the Joker." Dr. Arkham removes his glasses and listens attentively to my proposition. "If you give me the chance to treat him, I'm sure that I could get through to him. I know that I'm new to this profession but perhaps patient 4479 will find my methods to be refreshing and innovative. After all, he did reach out to me. Maybe this message is a sign for help. Maybe he wants me to treat him. If that's the case, then I think we should appease him. As you well know, some patients can be very picky about who treats them; maybe that's been the Joker's problem all along. He probably has never had a doctor that he really liked. If he's reaching out to me, then perhaps he believes that I am that doctor that he's been waiting for. I completely understand any reservations you may have about me handling this delicate case, so I think that if I could just be given a few trial sessions with patient 4479, I could prove to you that I can handle him as my permanent patient." Dr. Arkham crosses his arms and leans back in his chair. He takes a moment to think about everything I've just said. Unlike Dr. Leland, he actually looks like he's considering taking me up on my offer. I hope he does.

"Well, to be honest, your offer is very tempting Dr. Quinzel. As I've said before, I am completely at my wits end with patient 4479. However, there is something that greatly concerns me."

"What is it?"

"Well, yesterday, after the Joker had his _incident_ with Dr. Boris, I decided to have a little talk with him so that I could figure out why he did what he did. Of course, it's no surprise that I couldn't get a word out of him about said incident; however, what I found very surprising was his interest in you."

"What? What did he say?"

"He would not stop asking questions about you. I was taken aback by his sudden interest. I don't often speak personally to patient 4479 when he's admitted in my hospital, however, I think that I can safely assume that he has never shown so much interest in someone as he showed me yesterday with you." It was my turn to take a moment to process everything that Dr. Arkham said. I was not expecting this. The impression that I left him back in the medical ward couldn't have been strong enough for him to have so much interest in me. Could it? Has he somehow figured out that I'm his soulmate? There's no way he could have. We've never spoken to each other before so there is no way that he recognized my voice. I suppose he could have overheard my conversation with Guy and recognized my voice then. But still, we were some distance away from his room and we weren't speaking loudly; there's no way he could have heard me.

"What did the Joker want to know about me?"

"First he wanted to know your name. I knew he was referring to you because you are the only blonde doctor currently employed in this facility. Afterward he asked about how long you've been employed here, how old you were, and if you were married. Of course I don't make it a habit of revealing the personal information of my employees so I didn't answer his questions. I only gave him your name."

"Wow… Thank you for protecting my privacy, I appreciate it." I really do. I don't need him picking up intel about me. The less he knows about me the better. I don't want him using the information against me during a session.

"Of course. Now, going back to my previous concerns; I don't think it would be best for me to allow you to treat patient 4479."

"What? Why not?"

"Honestly, I would like to have you treat him; I really do. I am exceedingly interested in what would result from your efforts. I honestly believe that you have a serious chance of changing him. But I also believe that you aren't ready for patient 4479. He's extremely manipulative and deceiving and I believe that if I were to send you to him now, he would destroy you. I don't want to lose any more employees. I promise that you will get your chance to treat him; when you're ready."

"When will that be?"

"I'd say in a couple of years. When you've gained enough experience."

I sigh heavily. "I understand. You're looking out for me, and I appreciate it. I just can't help feeling disappointed."

Dr. Arkham smiles. "I understand, Dr. Quinzel. Trust me, the minute I'm sure you can handle him is the very same minute where I will grant him as your patient."

I smile back at him. "Okay. I'm going to hold you to this." "Of course."

When I leave Dr. Arkham's office, I don't feel as disappointed as I should. I feel hopeful. Dr. Arkham is on my side. He wants me to treat the Joker. He just doesn't want me to get hurt; which is sweet of him but, I'm convinced that I can handle myself. Now that I know that the Joker has a deep interest in me, I'm sure that he wouldn't hurt me. At least not right off the bat. He'd be too busy trying to figure me out first.

I guess all I have to do is prove to Dr. Arkham that I'm ready for this. So, from here onward, I am going to work my ass off and pull extra weight around here until he realizes that I can handle the Joker. I swear, I will have him as my patient sooner than he thinks.

* * *

 **AN: Sorry for the long wait! I'm really trying to update as often as I can. Trust me, I hate waiting just as much as the next guy, so I'm going to try to update at least twice a week. I hope everyone liked this chapter. I know, I know, I know; why is the story moving so slow? Why won't you let them meet yet? We're getting there; I promise you. Have patience, it's going to happen soon. Thank you everyone for your reviews, I read every single one and I love them all. It's like I said before, those reviews really fuel me on and keep me going. So please, keep 'em coming. I love feedback and I really take your suggestions into consideration. Once again, thank you everyone and I'll see ya in the next chapter!**


	6. New Impressions

**Chapter Six:**

 **New Impressions**

Over the past three weeks I've learned to love doing progress reports; because I have so much progress to report! I have seen some significant changes in the behavior of my two patients. If I keep working as hard with them as I am now, I think that I can have them declared sane in a couple of weeks. I've doubled our session times together and I'm thinking of asking for an additional thirty-minute session slot for each patient on Fridays; but I might be over doing it. They do need their reflection time after all.

As I'm finishing up the last of this week's progress report, I hear three light taps on my office door. Guy suavely strolls in the room and takes a seat opposite me, leaning back in the chair and bringing his feet up to rest on my desk. I look up from my work for a moment to give him a teasing disapproving look. "Make yourself at home, why don't you…"

"Well, don't mind if I do." Guy brings one hand behind his head and the other produces a green apple from somewhere in his lab coat. He takes a really loud bite and chews it slowly and obnoxiously. I give him another disapproving look that immediately changes into a smirk when I throw my pen, hitting him right on his forehead.

"Ow! What was that for?"

"For being an ass." I smile and grab another pen from the many that I have in a mug on my desk.

"An ass? Me? But I was just doing what you said." Guy takes another loud obnoxious bite. I roll my eyes and focus on finishing my report.

"What's that?" Guy ask in-between bites. "You doing a progress report?"

"Yup. I'm almost done."

"Good. 'Cause I didn't come here just to annoy you. I need a favor."

"Oh? What do you need from me?"

"Well, one of my patients suffers from gynophobia and I think that he's progressed enough to meet a woman in a controlled setting."

"I don't mind helping you out but are you sure he's ready? I don't have being strangled or bludgeoned on my list of things to do today."

"I know, I know. Taking him into the co-ed ward last month was a huge mistake. He took a bigger step than he could handle and that's my fault. But, I think that if I control the meeting this time, and limit his exposure to one woman alone, I think that he could handle the encounter in a positive way."

"Okay. I trust your judgement. When do you want me to meet him?"

"Today if you're not busy. I don't want to make this meeting a big thing because that would just freak him out. I just want you to come with me outside of his cell and say hi."

"That's it?"

"Yeah. Just a quick and simple meet and greet. I want him to take baby steps."

"Alright, I can do that. Let me just finish dotting these I's and crossing these T's."

Guy and I sit in a comfortable silence for the next ten minutes while I finish up my progress report. By the time Guy finishes eating his apple and throws out the core, I've finished my report and am ready to go.

"I'm done. We can go now." Guy and I rise from our seats and leave my office to head down to the men's ward. When I close the door behind Guy, I make sure to lock it. This is a new habit of mine. I don't want any new surprises waiting for me when I get back. Not that locking the door helps, but, it makes me feel safer. It shouldn't because when the Joker left that beautiful bouquet in my office, the door had been locked; so, locking the door won't prevent him from entering again.

Speaking of that beautiful bouquet, I was a little melancholy earlier today because when I visited my office this morning, the bouquet was gone. I had left a note telling the cleaning crew not to touch it but I guess the flowers have become so withered and brown that they decided to ignore my note and just toss the decaying plants anyway. I wasn't ready to throw them out yet. I had just grown accustomed to their sour aroma. I guess the cleaning crew thought it was a health hazard keeping the flowers out any longer because I will admit, their scent was really questionable. I guess I should thank them for doing what I couldn't because for the last two weeks I knew that those flowers needed to be thrown away, but I didn't have the heart to do it.

"So how's the packing coming along?" Guy asks as we climb down several flights of stairs.

"Eh, I'm working pretty slowly. I have a couple of things put away here and there, but I can't say that I've finished boxing up an entire room yet."

"Seriously? You are slow. I've got my living room and half of my bedroom stuff packed up already. Have you been binge watching another TV show again?"

"Of course not! I learned my lesson last time, remember? Now I only watch two episodes a day."

"Good girl." Guy pats my head roughly with each syllable and I playfully punch him in the shoulder to get him to stop.

"To be honest, I've really been busy with coming up with different methods to advance my patients' progress towards sanity."

"You work too hard. I mean, what's the rush?" Well for one, I don't want to lose the Joker to another doctor, and vice versa; I don't want to lose another doctor to the Joker.

"I guess I just really want to see my patients get out of here and live normal lives again. I care about them."

"It's hard not to care isn't it? Even when you don't want to, it somehow always happens. It must be a doctor/patient thing."

"Or maybe you and I are just softies?" I smile and Guy smiles back.

"Maybe."

"Well anyway, I could come over on Saturday and help you finish packing, if you want."

"Are you kidding? You're the one that needs help not me."

I laugh. "Fine. Come help me on Saturday and I'll go help you out Sunday."

"Alright, but we really need to finish by Tuesday, at least. We need to be in that apartment by next weekend."

"I know, I know. I promise that I will really buckle down and finish packing in time."

Guy and I reach the men's ward where he swipes his employee identification card to get us both past the first gate. We have to pass through a metal detector before a guard is allowed to buzz us past the second and final gate. The guard currently on duty looks me up and down questionably. "I've never seen you before. Do you have authorization to be down here miss? You didn't swipe at the first gate."

"Sorry. I didn't think I had to. I'm here with Dr. Kopski to visit one of his patients." The guard still looks a bit skeptical but he buzzes me in anyway. It's good to know that security is on top of their job and not just lazily allowing anyone to pass through. The patients in this ward are a bit violent so security has to be good on this level. Guy told me that each patient in this ward has committed murder in some way or form.

I have to admit that it pisses me off that Guy was given a higher level patient than I was. We started this job at the same time and I even have better qualifications for this job than he does; I should have been given patients on the same level as him. I guess back then, Dr. Arkham didn't think that I could handle violent patients because I'm a woman. That's alright though; I'll soon prove everyone wrong once I have the Joker as my patient.

When Guy and I have passed through both gates of security, we walk down a long hallway until we reach the main double doors which houses the male patients on the other side of it. Guy graciously opens the door for me. "My patient's cell is all the way at the far end of the ward so be prepared to have every single one of these guys ogle you on the way there."

I nod and square my shoulders a bit as I come into sight to the patients. There are two long rows of cell after cell on each wall. Looking up, there is a second floor of cells above the ground rows. Guards look down from the railings and nod whenever we make eye contact. The patients' cells in this ward are very different from the cells in the minimum security ward where my patients are kept. The cells up in minimum are regular barred cells that you'd find in any prison; the patients there even share cells if they're well enough to. Here, the cells are cavities in the walls that have a large air holed glass wall instead of the typical jailbird barred wall. This ward definitely resembles a mental institution better than the minimum security ward does, but, it also emits a more intimidating aura than the minimum does.

As Guy and I pass each cell, I hear cat-call after cat-call being directed towards me. These patients are whistling and hooting as if they haven't seen a real woman in years. As we continue to walk, I lean a little closer towards Guy. "Have any of these men seen a woman since they've been here? Are female doctors and nurses not allowed to work with them?"

"Oh they are. And they do. It's just that none of them ever come through here. Whenever they have session time or need medical attention, the guards take the patients out to where ever they need to be. Women don't usually have to step foot in this ward."

"Well that explains it."

Before we reach the end of the ward, Guy stops me in my tracks. "Do you mind waiting here while I have a quick word with my patient? I want to prep him a bit."

"Of course Guy, go ahead." I wave him off and watch as he stops outside of a cell to talk to the patient in it. The other patients are too loud so I can't hear what they're saying. I give up on trying to interpret their conversation and let my eyes scope out the long room. There are a lot of patients here. Those that can see me are staring at me unashamed that they are being caught doing so. I look away from them and let my eyes rest on the huge caged elevator at the very end of the long room. It looks very old and rusty. I wonder if it even works anymore. As I look closer, I notice that the thick cord that pulls the elevator up and down is moving. I think someone is using the elevator right now; so I guess it does work.

After watching the cord vibrate and pull for a while, the clanks and groans of the ascending elevator are faintly heard and grow louder and louder as it reaches this floor. When it finally arrives, a big metal box pulls into the barred cage and a soft 'ding' sounds. The caged door opens up along with the elevator doors to reveal a group of nine guards surrounded by a large green creature.

What is that?! Is it human? I've heard that Arkham Asylum houses meta-humans but this is incredible! It's one thing to hear about it and then another to actually see one of these patients with my own eyes. The creature is too large for the little boxed elevator, so he is bent down and scrunched into the box with the other nine guards crammed in with him. The guards shuffle out first and then the creature ducks under the open door and squeezes his way through it. When he is finally free from the elevator, he stands straight and reveals how large he really is. He is enormous! Not only is he really tall, he also has a really large muscle build. This guy looks like he could knock anybody out with one punch easily. He has unusual green scaled skin coating his entire body. From what I can see, he has no body hair anywhere. His eyes are a dark shade of brown and they blink unusually from right to left instead of up and down. He looks like a cross between a lizard and a human.

The lizard man moves his neck from side and side to crack the kinks in his neck. He takes his time stretching himself out after the uncomfortable elevator ride which makes some of the guards visibly nervous. One of them standing behind the lizard man is holding a long police baton that he uses in a moment of courage to poke the lizard man. "Come on, get moving!" He shouts.

The lizard man growls and adopts an intimidating stance as he turns to the guard who poked him. The guard looks up into the creature's eyes and looks like he has just seen his life flash before his eyes. He swallows a lump in his throat and tries to recreate the same courage that he had a moment ago. "Come on. Y-y-you heard m-me. You n-need to get moving."

The lizard man hisses before he lunges at the guard. His thick sharp teeth sink into the guard's arm before he rips it off of his body with little effort. Blood flies everywhere and the guard falls, wailing out on the floor, screaming for medical attention. I stand at the edge of the room in complete shock. I'm watching everything happen as if I'm watching a movie. The lizard man didn't just rip off the guard's arm, he's actually eating it! He is literally gnawing and chewing on the bloody limb as if it were a normal afternoon snack! I can't believe what I'm seeing. My eyes stay locked onto the lizard man's mouth. I watch him chew and swallow every last bit of the guard's arm until he has completely consumed it. The other guards have been scrambling and running around, trying to reestablish order by shouting at the lizard man and trying to get his attention. Unfortunately, the lizard man isn't interested in listening to them, his eyes lock onto the guard's other arm. The bloodied amputated guard notices the look in the lizard man's eyes and anticipates what his next move is. He uses the arm he has left to pull himself slowly across the floor in a sad attempt to escape the lizard man's second assault.

"NO! Please, don't! I have kids! Don't do this!" The guard pleads for his life with no avail as the lizard man sinks his teeth into the guard's other arm. The other guards start hitting the lizard man as roughly as they can but he easily shakes them off with little trouble. One of the guards calls for back-up because none of them are equipped with anything strong enough to stun the creature. At this point, something in me snaps and my mind finally connects with the reality of what's happening. My feet move forward towards the scene before I lose my nerve and this new sense of clarity. I stop when my stilettos meet the thick pool of blood on the floor. I stand, shoulders squared, before the lizard man as his teeth retract from the guard's remaining arm as my presence immediately capture's the creature's full attention. His large eyes gorge into mine as he blinks in that peculiar right to left manner. I stare back at him, not giving anything away. At this moment, I can honestly say that I don't feel intimidated by him, and I'm not afraid of him.

"Who are you?" I ask, hopeful that he has the ability to speak. The creature hisses at me in an attempt to scare me and avoid my question. I don't move a muscle however, and the creature stares at me for a moment before he answers.

"I'm Killer Croc," the creature says in his deep, gravelly voice. I cross my arms and raise my eyebrows at him.

"Seriously? Is that really the name that your mother gave you?" A faint growl can be heard coming from his throat as he looks down with furrowed eyebrows. He seems to remember something private and painful. I unfold my arms and relax my shoulders a bit as I take two steps closer towards the lizard man. There's something about the way he looks right now that makes me take pity on him.

In a gentle voice, I attempt to soothe down his temper and bring his attention back to me. "So, what's your name?"

The creature takes a moment before he looks back at me and answers. "Waylon Jones."

I let out a breath that I didn't realize I was holding in and smile at him, proud that he answered me.

"It's nice to meet you. My name is doctor Harleen Quinzel. Do you want to tell me why you ripped this man's arm off?" I nod towards the guard on the floor who has now fallen unconscious.

"He had it comin'."

I raise an eyebrow. "Did he?"

"Mmhmm. Pokey motha-fuckah."

I smile at his cussing; it's kind of cute. "You do realize that what you did was wrong right?"

Waylon doesn't answer. He just hisses. I let him contemplate his actions for a moment before I ask him what's really on my mind.

"Did you really have to eat his arm to teach him a lesson?"

"Yup." Ew.

"Why?"

"It's tasty."

"Really? Raw human meat is tasty to you?"

"Yup. You wanna try?" He reaches for the unconscious guard but I immediately take a step forward and stop him before he rips off his other arm.

"NO! No, thank you. I'll take your word for it." Waylon leans back and chuckles low and deep. I join him and laugh lightly until I notice a S.W.A.T. looking group of men creeping up quietly behind Waylon. My smile immediately drops when I realize that they want to stealthily knock him out.

"Hey, Waylon? You're ready to move on from this aren't you?" I need to get him moving. If the guards see him cooperating with me, then they'll have no need to knock him out.

Waylon looks at me with wide eyes. "Wow…"

I furrow my eyebrows in confusion. "What is it?"

"Haven't heard someone else say my name in years." Aww! My need to protect him has just quadrupled. I need to get him moving.

I smile up at him. "Well, get used to it Waylon, because after today I'll be sure to have everyone in this facility address you by your birth given name. But, right now you have to promise me that you aren't going to eat any more of these guards. We need to get you to where you need to be. Will you cooperate with us?"

Waylon growls while he thinks about my proposition. "Fine."

I release a sigh of relief. "Thank you."

I walk to Waylon's side as he turns to make the long walk out of the men's ward. However, as soon as Waylon faces the direction of the S.W.A.T. looking team, one of them shoots him with a taser gun and Waylon falls to his knees and hisses in pain.

"What are you doing?! Stop it!" I shout angrily.

"We're sorry doctor," one of the guards answers. "But we've been given orders to take out the Croc."

"What? Why? He was cooperating! And don't call him Croc, his name is Waylon." The other guard stops tazing him so that another doctor can stick a needle of white serum into his neck. They're trying to put him to sleep so that they can transport him easily.

"Hey!" I scream at the doctor. "Stop that! It isn't necessary." I start marching towards the doctor but a pair of arms wraps around my waist and prevents me from moving any further.

Guy whispers in my ear. "Stop it Harleen. Let these people do their jobs."

"Do their jobs? Our jobs are to help and reform these patients. How are we supposed to do that when they can't even trust him to make it across the damn hallway?"

"Harleen, he ripped the guard's arm off. How can he be trusted after that?"

"He was provoked! That guard was being unnecessarily rough with him, so what did he expect would happen?" The doctor is flicking his needle and is getting ready to insert it in Waylon's neck.

"Hey, you! I said stop it! That isn't necessary!" I try, unsuccessfully, to squirm out of Guy's grasp but he is surprisingly stronger than he looks. I realize that Guy really isn't going to let me interfere with what's happening, so I decide to shout out an apology to Waylon because his changed behavior should not have been awarded this way. "I'm sorry Waylon. You don't deserve this."

The doctor with the white serum looks at me and seems to take pity on my situation. "I'm sorry Dr. Quinzel, but I've been given strict orders to sedate the patient."

"Strict orders? From who?"

"Me." A deep female voice answers from behind the crowd of the S.W.A.T. looking team. A dark skinned woman with short trimmed hair steps forward to address me properly.

"Hello Dr. Quinzel, my name is Amanda Waller and I'm here to collect this patient."

Guy releases me from his grip so that I can properly speak to this woman. I straighten out my coat before I respond to Ms. Waller.

"What do you mean you're here to collect him?"

"I'm transferring him to another facility where he will be receiving different treatment."

"Different treatment? Are you his new doctor?"

Ms. Waller smiles. "No. I am not a doctor."

I stare at her in confusion, not understanding her role in his transfer.

"So, where are you taking him?" I ask.

"I run a small correctional facility in Louisiana called Belle Reve. Right now, we're in need of patients like Mr. Jones here." Oh, I see. It must be a start-up facility looking for some high profile cases to raise their medical rankings.

"Now I understand. Forgive me for saying so Ms. Waller but, I still believe that sedating Mr. Jones was unnecessary."

"Thank you for your concern Dr. Quinzel but this is a customary precaution that I take with all of my new members. This has absolutely nothing to do with his behavior."

"I see…" It seems a bit extreme, but, if this is what she does with every new patient then I guess it's being done for a good reason.

"I have to say that you have impressed me Dr. Quinzel."

"I have?"

"You were able to talk Mr. Jones out of turning that guard into his afternoon snack. It takes a person with a certain kind of moxy -or as I like to call it- a certain kind of crazy, to be brave enough to confront a predator when he's out to kill. That crazy that you have in you, don't lose it. You're going to need it if you ever want to make anything of yourself in this life." Ms. Waller snaps her fingers and the large group of S.W.A.T. looking guards carry Waylon's unconscious body onto a stretcher and start wheeling him out of the ward. Ms. Waller follows behind them after she bids me farewell. "It was nice meeting you Dr. Quinzel. I'll be sure to let Dr. Arkham know of your efforts here."

"Um, thank you Ms. Waller. It was nice meeting you too."

Ms. Waller smiles before leaving but her smile does not reach her eyes. "Until we meet again."

* * *

Today has been a quiet Friday afternoon in comparison to yesterday's hectic incident. I heard that the guard who got his arm ripped off is still alive in the hospital in critical condition. I hope he survives.

Right now, I'm on my way to Dr. Arkham's office. When I went to the staff room earlier today to grab a cup of coffee, Dr. Leland found me and told me that Dr. Arkham wanted to have a word with me when I finished all of my sessions for the day. I'm sure he wants to discuss my actions yesterday. I wonder if Ms. Waller really did tell him what happened like she said she was going to. I'm not sure why, but, that woman has an untrustworthy vibe about her. I'm sort of doubting her sincerity towards my actions.

I finally reach Dr. Arkham's door and tap it three times to announce myself.

"Please, come in," Dr. Arkham calls from behind his desk.

I open the door and Dr. Arkham greets me with a smile. "Ah, just the person I wanted to see. Please, have a seat." I take my seat opposite him and cross my legs, placing my hands in my lap.

"I'm assuming you know why you're here?" He asks.

"To discuss what happened yesterday with Waylon Jones, correct?"

"Correct. I've brought you here to congratulate you. Yesterday evening, I received a kindly worded email from Ms. Amanda Waller commending you for your efforts in preventing Mr. Jones from devouring one of our security guards. She specifically emphasizes how much she admired your valor and psychiatric techniques in getting an unstable and uncontrollable patient like Mr. Jones to calm down and behave. This compliment is an enormous honor coming from Amanda Waller. I've known Ms. Waller for many years and she very rarely takes the time to commend one of my employees for their work. Your skills as a doctor must be greater than I imagined." Dr. Arkham folds his hands over his desk and leans forward, looking me directly in the eyes. A slow, somewhat wicked smile stretches across his face. "Harleen, this is exactly what I've been waiting for. This is what I've been waiting for you to show me; that you know how to take control of a dangerous situation and that you will not be intimidated or pushed over easily." Dr. Arkham pauses for a moment. "Harleen, I think you're ready."

Oh my God. My heart is pounding roughly in my chest. With wide eyes and a shaky voice, I ask the magic question to confirm my assumption.

"Ready for what?"

Dr. Arkham's grin widens. "I think you're ready for the Joker."

* * *

 **AN: Yay we finally made it! Harleen is going to meet the Joker in the next chapter! I am so excited to start writing it, it's going to be fun! I hope you guys liked Killer Croc and Amanda Waller's appearance, they are awesome characters that I couldn't resist adding to the story. I hope you all liked this chapter and leave reviews for it because they are greatly appreciated. I'll see you all in the next chapter! :)**


	7. The First Session

**Chapter Seven:**

 **The First Session**

YEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSS!

It finally happened! It finally happened! It finally happened!

Dr. Arkham has finally granted me the Joker.

The Joker is officially my patient!

I am freaking out! I knew I wouldn't have to wait a whole year to meet him, but I didn't expect any of this to happen so soon. I'm flipping out! Almost literally. When I left Dr. Arkham's office that Friday, I did several cartwheels in an empty hallway on my way back to my office. I was so excited, I needed to release some energy somehow.

I have been a roller coaster this whole weekend. On Friday I was so excited and happy that I forced Guy to go out and celebrate with me without telling him why. On Saturday I was freaking out about meeting my soulmate for the first time and I was worried about what impression I'll leave on him. When Guy came over to help me pack, he noticed how nervous and jittery I was, so I told him about how I was given the Joker as my new patient. Of course, I made sure to leave out the tiny detail about him being my soulmate. Guy was really happy for me. He told me that he understood why I was so nervous, but he gave me a ton of reassurances on my skills as a doctor and he told me that he believes in me; which means so much to me. After that, I cheered up again and let myself be excited for the rest of the weekend.

Today, however, I am freaking out again! Right now it's 8a.m. on a Monday morning and I'm getting ready to start the day. The problem is I don't know what I am going to do with myself today. Before I get into this problem, I want to emphasize the severity of my situation: I AM MEETING MY SOULMATE TODAY FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER. I MUST LOOK **PERFECT**.

I guess whatever I choose to wear doesn't really matter because my lab coat will cover it anyway. I usually wear my coat fully buttoned, but I think today I won't button it at all so that I can show off my outfit. I've decided to wear my really cute red blouse with a black pencil skirt and black tights to go with it. And of course I'm going to wear my signature black stilettos; I never go to work without them.

When I finish getting dressed, I shuffle around the bounds of boxes stacked up in odd places in my room, and find myself in the bathroom looking into the mirror above the sink. Okay, what should I do with my hair? I want to wear it down because I don't usually wear it like that to work; but there's a reason for that. I look like a Barbie doll; my co-workers and my patients would never take me seriously. My classmates and professors never did. I don't want the Joker to take one look at me and assume I slept my way through school. I'll just tie my hair up in a ponytail. It's a cute hairstyle anyway; you could never go wrong with a cute ponytail.

Now, as for my makeup, I think I'll keep it somewhat simple. I apply brown eyeshadow above my eyes and then I carefully trace my eyelids with black eyeliner. I brush some mascara on my lashes and rub on some pink lip gloss for the final touch. I look into the mirror satisfied with my results. I don't look like I'm trying too hard to be noticed. I wouldn't want him to think that I got all dressed up just for him. After all, I do want to keep this relationship a professional one; at least until I declare him sane.

* * *

When Guy and I arrive at the Asylum forty-five minutes later, Guy wishes me luck and bids me farewell as he scurries off to go start his first morning therapy session. I on the other head straight to Dr. Arkham's office. There are still some files and instructions that he needs to give me before my first session with the Joker today. When I reach his office, the door is open so I decide to walk right in. Dr. Arkham is sitting at his desk writing furiously in a notebook.

"Dr. Arkham? Are you ready for me?" I ask.

Dr. Arkham immediately closes his notebook upon my arrival and gives me his full attention. "Oh! Umm, yes, Dr. Quinzel, please have a seat."

"Thank you." I slide into the seat opposite him and rest my hands on my lap.

"How are you today?"

I smile shyly. "To be honest, I'm a little nervous. But don't worry, I won't let my nerves get to me."

Dr. Arkham returns my smile. "I'm sure you won't. I'm positive that you can handle this. I'm actually excited to get you in the session room with him. I'm confident that you will be able to make some progress with him." I honestly think I will too. How could the Joker not open up to me; I'm his soulmate. If I can't cure him of his insanity, then no one can.

"Thanks, I'm sure that this arrangement will work well too."

Dr. Arkham produces a key from the left pocket of his lab coat. He uses the key to unlock a small drawer on the right side of his desk. He shuffles through a couple of beige files before he finds the one that he is looking for. He briefly opens the file to skim its contents before handing it to me. "This is the Joker's file. It's not much, but this is all we've been able to uncover about him."

I open the file to find that the patient's profile is practically empty. Every category has the Joker's personal information listed as unknown. I shoot an eyebrow at Dr. Arkham. "This doesn't give me anything to work with."

"Yes, I know. I need you to fill out that profile as much as you possibly can. Unfortunately, you're going to have to go into that session blind; we do not have any information whatsoever on the Joker's past. However, there are some suggested illnesses that we believe he might be suffering from. You can start by treating him with the assumption that these diagnoses are valid. I trust you've studied his criminal record over the weekend?"

"Yes, I have. He has quite a colorful record might I add."

"That he does. Studying his every known move should assist you in your analysis of him. Now before I send you off, I'd like to remind you about the security measures. Naturally there will be two guards overseeing your therapy session for your protection; would you like them stationed in the session room with you or would you rather have them waiting outside the door?"

Well, I certainly don't want any gossiping guards listening in on my therapy sessions. "I'd like to have them waiting outside the session room please. I would like to create a comfortable and trusting environment for the Joker. If I had the orderlies in the room, then they would completely destroy those efforts."

"I understand. I'll inform the guards immediately of your instructions. The last thing you need to remember is that each session will be visually recorded. Unfortunately, this facility is far too old and is in need of some serious upgrades; The cameras do not record sound and they only film in black and white."

"Wow, really?"

"I know. It's a pretty old system huh? Will this be a problem for you? Would you like a different method of recording your sessions?"

Hell no! This is kind of perfect. I don't want anyone listening in on our sessions but I don't mind people watching them. It's not like I plan on doing anything with the Joker that requires privacy. We're only going to be talking. "No. The old cameras will do fine, thank you."

"Very well. At this point all I can do is remind you of the faith I have in you and wish you the best of luck."

"Thank you Dr. Arkham," I say as I rise from my seat. "Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity to do this." Dr. Arkham rises from his chair with me to escort me out of the room.

"You're welcome Harleen. I know you can do this." I smile back at Dr. Arkham before he closes his office door on me. His faith in me fills me with determination and I'm even more confident than ever that I will be able to get through to the Joker.

* * *

I have twenty minutes before my first therapy session with the Joker. That gives me plenty of time to go to my office and review his criminal records. I want to remind myself of the kind of man that I'm dealing with. I've heard stories of how when a person meets their soulmate for the first time that they feel this overwhelming feeling to walk up to them and embrace them. I'm obviously not going to allow myself to do that, so I want to keep in mind just how violent a person this man is. I'll only allow myself to be with this man when he has been declared sane and is out of this asylum. Until then, he will be receiving no romantic gestures from me.

When I arrive at my office I immediately plop myself down in my chair at my desk and start rereading The Joker's criminal records. I also have this pretty thick binder of articles about the Joker's crazy shenanigans and public displays of terror and destruction. I have to say, this man has done some pretty insane things in the past couple of years. He's murdered so very many people. I wonder if he'll ever be able to repair the damage that he's caused to all of those people. Probably not. The things that he's done is more than enough to scar anyone irreparably for life.

As I'm flipping through the binder I hear a light tap at my door. I look up to find Dr. Leland standing shyly in the doorway.

"Hey Harleen. Do you have a minute?" She asks softly and timidly walks into the room without taking a seat.

"Of course Dr. Leland. Would you like to have a seat?" I gesture towards the seat opposite mine.

"No, thank you. I don't want to keep you. I know that your session will be starting soon. I just wanted to ask you one last time to forget about treating the Joker."

I sigh heavily. "Joan-"

"I already know what you're going to say. I know that you're not going to give this up. I just had to try one last time."

I can't help but smirk at her. "Why Dr. Leland you make it sound as though this is the last time you're going to see me."

"It just might be! I've told you Harleen, the odds of surviving your first session with the Joker are slim. I just couldn't live with myself if I didn't try to talk you out of this again."

With great effort, I ignore the need to roll my eyes at her. I am so sick and tired of this same old song and dance. I do appreciate her concern but I'm tired of hearing her tell me what I should and shouldn't do. I feel like she's butting into my affairs and it's really irritating. Unlike Guy and Dr. Arkham, she has no confidence in my psychiatric abilities whatsoever. I know she regards me as a novice in this line of work so it's no wonder that she sees me as a dead woman walking right now. I plaster a smile on my face and try to sound as sincere as I possibly can. "Thanks again Joan for your concern in me but I promise you that this isn't going to be the last you'll see of me."

"I hope so…" Joan sighs and slowly walks out of my office.

I'm glad she dropped this conversation so easily; I was prepared to give her a whole other speech of reassurances. I'm glad I didn't have to though. I get to save my breath.

I glance at the clock on the wall and notice that it's time for me to start heading down to maximum security.

 _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAA!_

I can't help but smile at the sound of the Joker's laughter. Suddenly I feel really excited to finally meet him! He's probably laughing right now because the orderlies are moving him to the session room.

I grab a pen and the Joker's thin file before I leave my office. I sneak a really quick peek at my reflection in my tiny compact mirror before I lock my office up completely. I'm still satisfied with the way I look so I hurriedly toss the mirror to the side and scramble out of my office in fear of being late for my first session with my soulmate.

* * *

"Good afternoon Harleen," says Lyle after I finish passing through the various security gates. He's leaning up against the wall as though he's been waiting for me to arrive.

"Good afternoon Lyle, how's it going?" I say as I walk right past him. Lyle hurries to my side and walks with me to the therapy session room all the way at the other end of the ward.

"Well, I'm hoping that this goes well. I don't want to see anything bad happen to you Harleen. Are you sure you don't want us in the room with you guys?"

"I'm sure. Don't worry Lyle, you guys will be just as effective waiting outside the door. If anything goes wrong, I promise I'll scream for you, okay?"

"If you say so." At this point, Lyle and I reach the door to the therapy room. The sight of the Joker through the door's window swells my heart more than I'd like it to. He's leaning back in his chair with his handcuffed arms resting on the table. His eyes are fixed on the very tiny barred window. He's watching the wind slam the rain violently against the window without blinking his eyes at all. His vibrant green hair is smoothed back perfectly. Overall, the Joker looks pretty well cleaned up today. Aw, did he fix himself up just for me? I wonder what he's found out about me; like whether or not he knows that we're soulmates. I sort of hope he doesn't. This will be so much easier on me if I know that he has no clue about who I am. I guess I'm just going to have to work with the assumption that he doesn't know anything.

"Alright Dr. Quinzel, listen up," says the orderly who isn't Lyle; I don't know his name yet. "Under no circumstances whatsoever are you allowed to make any physical contact with the patient. If a situation arises where contact is necessary, call us immediately and we will handle the patient. We are going to be standing outside this door for the entire session. All you have to do is scream and we'll come in running, got it?"

I nod. "Got it."

"Also," Lyle butts in. "Dr. Arkham told us to cut this session off after thirty minutes so make sure you work with the time you've got."

"Only thirty minutes? I can't get much done in thirty minutes."

"Sorry Harleen but that's the boss's orders." Ugh… fine! Whatever. I'll work with the time I'm given for now. I'll just make a mental note to speak to Dr. Arkham about this later.

With my hand on the knob I close my eyes and breathe in deeply. This is it Harleen. It's time to meet the love of your life.

First impressions are everything, so after I turned the knob and open the door, I make sure to walk in with confidence and appear as calm and collected as possible. The Joker turns his head to watch me as I enter the room and sit down in the seat opposite him. I place his file down on the table and shove my pen behind my right ear. I'd like our introduction to be somewhat casual; I don't want to start scribbling down notes right off the bat. I fold my hands above the table and I finally allow myself to really look him in the eyes. The moment that my eyes meet his, all of my emotions pour from my heart and make my chest squeeze and my breath quietly deepen. I can honestly say that the only thing I want to do right now at this very moment is walk around this table and wrap my arms around him. Everything in me is screaming at me and yearning to be embraced by him. With _great_ effort, I manage to lock all of these desires in my aching chest and allow myself to simply smile at him. I'm probably flashing more teeth than I should be, but I can't help it; I feel so happy right now!

"Good afternoon. My name is Dr. Harleen Quinzel and I'll be overseeing your therapeutic needs from here on out." I wait a moment to give him a chance to introduce himself but he says nothing. As a matter of fact, now that I'm actually paying attention to him and not focusing on controlling my inner emotions, I notice that he's regarding me quite coldly. He's staring at me almost the same way he did a couple of weeks ago back in the medical ward; only this time he isn't exactly glaring at me. He's looking at me pretty intensely but I wouldn't say that he's trying to come off as menacing. He's just looking me directly in the eyes, expressionless; and without blinking might I add. His stare is a bit unnerving, but I decide to pretend that it doesn't bother me at all.

"So, I know that you're used to the general public calling you 'The Joker' but is there anything else that you would like to be called? As your psychiatrist it's inevitable that you and I will develop an intimate relationship, so perhaps you have another name in mind that you would like me to refer to you as. Your birth name perhaps?" I give him a moment to speak and he doesn't take it; again. He just continues to stare at me.

"If you'd like me to refer to you as the Joker, then that's fine by me. I just wanted to make sure that you were comfortable with me calling you that." To be honest, I also wanted to see if I could push my luck and get some good information right from the start, but with the way he's responding to my questions I doubt that I'll get anything good today.

"If at any point during our sessions you'd like me to call you anything else, please let me know. I'd like to make you as comfortable as I possibly can in these sessions." I pause another moment and nothing but silence fills the room. It would be nice if he would at least give me some different facial expressions to work with; his face is completely expressionless as he perceives me.

"So… is there anything in particular that you'd like to begin discussing?" Again, there's no response.

"Perhaps we could start from the beginning. Would you like to talk about your childhood?" Please?

"…" Of course not.

Maybe his childhood is too painful to start talking about right now. "I understand it if you aren't exactly comfortable with talking about your past right now. If you'd like we can talk about more recent events. Like the Gotham city bombing heist you pulled that landed you in here. Would you like to talk about that?" A long moment passes with neither of us saying anything. This man is not cooperating with me at all. I'm trying to make this easy for him but he's trying to do the complete opposite with me. I need him to understand that I'm only trying to help him here.

"Joker?" When I called him by this name, I noticed a slight reaction from him. He blinked and his eyes widened ever so slightly. "You do know why you're here, right?" He says nothing.

"You're here because you are a very sick man and it's my job to help you get better. I can't do that if you won't even say two words to me. Don't you want to get better?" Aaaaaannnd still no response.

"Joker, you have to understand that we cannot continue like this. _You_ cannot continue like this. You do understand that your behavior is unpardonable and needs to be remedied immediately?"

"…" Oh come on dude, throw me a bone here!

"If you could just help me understand why you do the things that you do, then perhaps from there we can find a solution to correcting your behavior."

…cricket, cricket…

"Joker please, I need you to work with me. There are so many things that I need you to explain to me."

"…" His silence is starting to bug me.

"I suppose if you don't feel like talking today, then you don't have to. We can cut this session short. But before we do. There is something that I'd like to ask you. It's probably not something that you can answer right now anyway, but I'll ask you nonetheless." I give him a brief moment to respond but of course he doesn't jump at the opportunity.

"What I want to know is... If there is a method to the madness?" My question hangs in the air in-between us as we both sit in silence, staring into each other's eyes. I wish this scene was as romantic as it sounds but it really isn't. The atmosphere is pretty heavy in here. We stay like this for a while, until a very slow, wide smile stretches across the Joker's face. His green eyes glint with joy and his cheek bones perk up beneath his eyes.

"I like you."

"…" This time I'm the one who stays silent. Did he just say what I think he said? Am I hearing things? Did he actually say that he likes me?

"I beg your pardon?"

His smile widens. "I said, I like you."

I can feel my cheeks warming up. I hope they aren't turning rosy right now. I don't want him to see that he affects me! I was totally unprepared for this. I didn't expect him to say that; of all things! Heck, I didn't expect him to say anything.

"This could be fun," the Joker chuckles. "You want to know how I got this way doc?"

I'm still in shock from his previous statement. All I can do right now is nod yes.

The Joker smiles and pretends to consider whether he should oblige me or not. His eyes roam the ceiling and he purses his lips to emphasize his internal debate. "Hmm… Okay!" His smile returns and the metal on his teeth glints in a way that makes him appear so very amused with this conversation. "I'll tell you what you want to know. …Eventually. But first, you've got to do something for me." He is smiling wickedly.

"What?"

"Smile for me. I want to see those pearly whites again."

My cheeks are on fire! I know that I'm blushing like crazy right now and I can't help it! He's so… charming. I thought that he would remain menacing and indifferent for the rest of the session. This was the last thing in the entire world that I was expecting to happen. He's actually flirting with me! I'm not ready for this! My cheeks burn brighter as I offer him a very shy smile.

The Joker laughs. "There they are. Dr. Quinzel has anyone ever told you that you have a beautiful smile?"

I laugh nervously. "Umm, I don't think so. Thank you." The Joker smiles.

"Umm, Mr. Joker, I-"

"Oh no," the Joker interrupts. "Please. Mr. Joker is my father. You can call me Mr. J." His teeth glint at the end of his sentence.

"Sure, if that's what you'd like, Mr. J."

"Yes, it has a better ring to it, don't you think?"

"Yes. As long as you're comfortable with it. That's the most important thing."

"Oh you are so very thoughtful, doctor."

"Well it's my job to make sure that you're taken care of and that you are as relaxed as possible."

The Joker leans back in his chair and raises -what should be- his eyebrow at me. "Really? Are you sure that you're only doing this because it's your job to?" I look at him surprised. Is he hinting at what I think he is? Has he figured it out? The Joker smiles wickedly at my shocked face. With wide eyes, I open my mouth to say something when Lyle and guard number two walk in to end my session.

"Oh pooh," says the Joker. "The boys have come to ruin the fun."

"Alright clown, it's time to get you back in lock-up," says the other orderly. He unlocks the Joker's chain from the table and he and Lyle grab him by each arm to escort him back to his cell. Before he leaves the room though, the Joker says something over his shoulder. "I'll see you on Wednesday doc."

* * *

The walk back to my office is a long one. I'm replaying everything that just happened over and over again in my head. I can't help but smile when I think about how flirty he was. But I'm still concerned about whether he knows that I'm his soulmate or not. I'm certainly not just going to ask him about it because what if he doesn't know. I'd like to keep him in the dark if I can.

When I reach my office door, I notice that the light is on inside. Is someone in there? I open the door to find Dr. Arkham and Dr. Leland sitting and waiting for me. I smile and throw my arms in the air in a way to show off my success. "I'm still alive!" Dr. Arkham smiles and Dr. Leland runs up to me and envelopes me in a tight hug.

"Oh Harleen, I'm so glad you're okay," she says after releasing me.

"So am I."

Dr. Arkham gets up from his seat with eager eyes. "So? How did it go?"

"It went surprisingly well. At first he wasn't being cooperative, but then all of a sudden he started enthusiastically engaging in the conversation. We didn't get to discuss any real issues yet but we were about to when the session was cut short. Dr. Arkham, I'm going to need more time with my patient if I'm ever going to make any real progress with him."

Dr. Arkham smiles. "You've got it. I'll tell the orderlies to start letting you two have hour long sessions."

"Thank you." I smile victoriously.

"So Harleen," says Dr. Leland. "Are you sure you're okay? He didn't try to hurt you?"

"No, not at all. He was very well behaved."

"I'm so glad to hear that but I'm also very pleasantly surprised by it." I wrap my arm around Joan's shoulder and give her a gentle endearing squeeze.

"By the way," I say. "How did you two get in here? I thought I locked up."

"Oh you did," answers Dr. Leland. "Dr. Kopski let me in and then shortly after Dr. Arkham joined me."

"Well, that's the last time I give Guy a spare key to anything of mine." I mumble teasingly.

"Well that wouldn't have stopped us." Says Dr. Arkham. "I have a key to every room in this facility."

"Fine, I guess I'll forgive him," I smile. "Just this once."

"Well, Harleen, I'm also glad to hear that you're okay and I very much look forward to reading your progress report next week." Dr. Arkham walks towards the door and throws a nod at Joan and me. "Ladies, if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to work." And with that, he leaves.

"I have to go too," says Dr. Leland. "I have another session in ten minutes. But you and I must celebrate this. Would you like to go out for dinner tonight? We can invite Dr. Kopski and I'll even bring my husband."

"Sure that sounds like fun. I can't wait."

"Okay, you can decide where we'll go because it's _you_ we're celebrating after all. I'll stop by later once you've made your decision, okay?"

"Okay. I'll see you later." Dr. Leland smiles at me before she leaves.

Wow. What a day. I'm glad everything turned out okay. I honestly can't wait to have my second session with the Joker on Wednesday. I wonder if he'll behave the same way he did today. If he does, I swear I'll be ready for it this time. I won't let myself get flustered again! I'm going to have to work really hard to keep this relationship a professional one; but I'm confident that I'll be able to get through this.

* * *

 **AN: My apologies for the long wait, but, you all understand that this chapter had to be perfect, right? It took some time for me to actually work up the nerve to sit down and write it. I'm super happy with how it all worked out though. This is by far my favorite chapter so far. I swear to you all that I was seriously fangirling when I wrote this! XD I couldn't help it, I love these two characters so freakin much. Thank you guys for reading and reviewing my work; I hope you all are enjoying this story as much as I am. And to those of you living in America: Happy Thanksgiving! :)**


	8. Getting to Know Each Other

**Chapter Eight:**

 **Getting to Know Each Other**

"Harleen!" Screams Guy from somewhere in the apartment.

"What?!" I scream back from my new bedroom.

"Breakfast!" Ooh, he cooked? Yes!

"Okay, I'm coming!" Looking into my tiny compact mirror, I quickly blush my cheeks and toss everything to the side when I'm done. I'm so hungry; I hope he made pancakes! I quickly make my way to the kitchen and trip over several boxes on my way there. We have random stuff stacked up everywhere. Our place looks like it came out of an episode of Hoarders.

When I near the kitchen, I expect the aroma of whatever Guy made to fill the room but my excitement drops when I smell nothing. When I turn the corner and finally enter the room, my shoulders slump when I see what Guy "cooked".

"Cereal?"

"Yeah." Guy says between a mouthful and then notices my disappointment. "What? You don't want any?"

Defeated, I sit down in a stool next to him and poke at the bowl of cereal that he poured for me. "No, I want it. I just got excited because I thought you made pancakes or something."

Guy laughs. "Me? Cook? No. My greatest dish is a cup of ramen noodles. I actually thought that you were a culinary master. I don't want to eat microwavable dinners and take-out so much anymore."

"Wow, I don't know if I should feel sorry for you or mad at you for your sexist comment."

"That wasn't sexist."

"Oh? So why did you assume that I could cook?"

Guy smiles into his bowl of cereal and says nothing.

"MmmHmm, that's what I thought." I smile triumphantly and scoop a spoonful of cinnamon toast crunch into my mouth.

"So anyway," Guy says around a mouthful. "You have a session with the Joker today huh? How do you think it's going to go this time?"

"Honestly," I say around a mouthful. "I have no idea. The man is an utter mystery. One minute he's menacing, the next he's indifferent, and then out of nowhere he becomes unbearably charming. His mood swings are unlike any other I've ever dealt with."

"Do you think he could be Bipolar?"

"I don't know, maybe. It's way too soon to tell."

"Yeah you're right. You've only had _one_ session."

Guy and I fall into a comfortable silence as we both work on finishing our cereal. Right now, I'm taking advantage of this quiet and peaceful moment to mentally prepare myself for today. I'm not in the mood to feel embarrassed and flustered again. I don't mind taking things slow with him; I understand that there is a lot of things that he's not comfortable enough to talk to me about yet, and that's fine. But that doesn't mean that I'm willing to let him run the show entirely and expose all of my emotions for his enjoyment.

I'm planning on being very careful about keeping my composure today. If I blush -even once- then I've failed myself and I'll just come straight home when it's over and curl up in a ball in the corner of my room and curse myself out profusely. If this little punishment doesn't motivate me enough, then I'll have to think of something else. The harsher I am on myself, the greater my resolve is not to fail; and I _really_ don't want to screw this up. I've been working so hard to get to this point that I refuse to let this opportunity slip through my fingers. Being the Joker's soulmate, I feel that it's my right to be the one who cures him. I honestly believe that I'm the only one who can do it. I've obviously survived one session already, and although I'm not the first person who is able to say that, I am one of _very_ few. Only Time will confirm if I truly am the right person for this job or not. But, I mean, come on; how could anyone other than me be able to get through to him? I'm positive that I'm the one destined to change him.

When I finish my cereal I place the bowl in the sink and maneuver my way back into my bedroom so that I can grab what I need for work. I pick up the Joker's file that I had left open on top of a couple of stacked boxes last night. I was trying to do an early assessment on his personality but, I gave up immediately. I've barely spoken to the man so I don't have much to go by. Today however, will be much different. He and I are having an hour long session together and I hope we've officially broken the ice on Monday so that he can be cooperative and communicate with me right off the bat.

After I shove everything that I need into my purse, I go to the bathroom to have a quick look at my reflection in the mirror. When I'm satisfied with what I see, I call out to Guy to get him moving. "Guy! Are you ready to go?!"

"Yeah, I'm waiting on you!"

I find Guy leaning against the front door with his satchel and keys in hand.

"Oh, sorry to keep you waiting. I thought you were still eating."

"It's fine, I wasn't waiting long." Guy opens the front door for me. "Let's go before I get lazy and decide to call in sick." We walk to his car parked right outside our place and spend the fifteen-minute drive listening to the morning news on the radio.

* * *

"I can't believe you're here again. I bet Bolton thirty bucks that you wouldn't show. Is there something wrong with you or do you just want to see me go broke?" I smile at orderly number two; I've really got to learn his name.

"Well you obviously weren't very confident about the bet because if you were, you wouldn't have brought my patient out and gotten him ready for me."

"Well Quinzel I'll have you know that thirty bucks means a lot to me but a full paycheck means a whole lot more. It was the boss's orders to bring the clown out; If I don't follow them, then what am I being paid for?" I laugh lightly. I like how this guy thinks; it's funny.

"Well, you've got a point there." The orderly stands before the door where the Joker is waiting for me. He puts his hand on the door knob and turns to me to have a final word before letting me in.

"Alright Quinzel, you remember the drill right? No physical contact and if you need us, just shout. Bolton will be here in a minute. We'll both be right outside this door the whole time alright?"

"Alright. Thank you," I smile. Before he opens the door for me, I quickly tug at random places of my clothes in an attempt to straighten things out. I mentally chide myself for worrying about my appearance right now. I'm not here to flirt and look good; I've got a job to do.

When I walk into the room, I have the Joker's full attention. A slow wicked smile spreads across his face and his eyes never leave mine. I offer him a warming smile before taking my seat across from him.

"Good afternoon Mr. J. How are you doing today?"

"Oh much better now that you're here doctor," the Joker grins and I do an excellent job of keeping my heartbeat steady.

"Well… I'm glad to hear that you're doing fine." I open my notebook and pull out my pen from behind my ear. I'm ready to make some progress today.

"On Monday you and I didn't really get enough time to get to know each other. So would you mind telling me a little about yourself now?"

The Joker's smile widens. "What would you like to know doll face?"

"Anything that you're willing to share with me."

The Joker purses his lips in a theatrical manner as he decides what piece of information about himself he's willing to tell me. "Hmmmmm, weeellll Dr. Quinzel, if there's one thing you need to know about me, it's this: I hate reruns."

I furrow my eyebrows. "Reruns? What do you mean? You'll never watch the same episode twice?"

"I hate it when people _do_ the same things over and over and over again. People need to mix things up you know?"

"I'm sorry but, I'm not following you."

The Joker sighs a little and then straightens himself up in his seat to better explain things to me. The chains of the handcuffs around his wrists rattle against the steel table with every movement that he makes. "Alright… let's take scarecrow as an example. Now that guy can make some pretty amazing stuff. _Fear toxin?_ " The Joker throws back his head and laughs heartily. I let myself smile a bit at the sound of it while I know he isn't looking at me. His laugh is so comforting to me. I love hearing it.

"You see doctor…" The Joker says, coming down from his laughing high. "The problem with him is that he's _always_ using it. Always relying on it. It was hilarious the first time he infected the city with it. …But the second and third time…" The Joker scowls in disapproval. "…not so much. I'm no one trick pony; and I _hate_ people who are."

I pause for a moment to process what he said and jot some notes down in my notebook. "I see… So you'll never do the same thing twice?"

The Joker leans forward a bit over the table. " _Never._ "

Absent-mindedly I tap my pen against my bottom lip. "That makes sense. Now that I think about it, I can't think of a single stunt that you pulled more than once."

"Of course not. That would be boring."

"Do you bore easily Mr. J?"

"Sure, but I'm easy to entertain," the Joker grins. I smile back reluctantly.

"Is that so?"

"MmHm. A joke or two here, some blood and gore there, and I'm a happy camper," the Joker laughs.

"You don't think that your methods of entertainment are a bit… extreme?"

"Of course, that's why it's fun doc! Don't you ever get tired of doing the same things over and over and over again?" He cocks his head to the side while he waits for my answer.

"Well, of course I do. Who doesn't? But that doesn't mean I go out and have a killing spree just for a few laughs."

The Joker bursts out in a fit of hysterics and I flinch at the sudden outburst; I wasn't expecting it. It takes a few minutes for him to catch his breath to be able to speak again.

"Oh you are so _funny_ doc!" I do nothing but smile in response. I don't understand his sense of humor.

"So you've never done it huh?" He asks.

"Have I ever what? Gone on a killing spree? No. Of course not." I didn't mean to, but, towards the end of my response I sounded insulted. It's obvious that I -or anyone else for that matter- would disapprove of that kind of behavior, but, I want to come off as a patient, understanding person. That way he'll find it easier to confide in me. I'm going to make a mental note to keep my stance on his habits as neutral as possible; for now.

"Well… Have you ever… _thought_ about it, hm?" He asks with hopeful eyes. Oh my gosh, I know I shouldn't be thinking this right now but his eyes have this beautiful gleam to them under these cheap fluorescent lights. -Oh my gosh Harleen, FOCUS!

"I'm sorry. Have I ever thought about what?"

The Joker grins, showing off his silver plaited teeth, and leans forward over the table. "Killing someone."

Uh oh. This is some super dangerous territory I'm in right now. I need to be super careful with this topic, but at the same time, I want to be honest with him. For some reason, the thought of lying to him seems unbearable to me. I think I'm incapable of doing it.

"Well…" I explain slowly. "To be honest… who hasn't thought about that sort of stuff? Of course we all have that one person in our lives who we wish terrible things would happen to; even I have a person or two in my life like that. But I never act on those feelings."

The Joker cocks his head to the side and looks a bit disappointed. "Why not?"

I stare at him as if locking eyes will help gorge my answer into his brain. "Because it's wrong." I sounded a bit more earnest than I had intended.

The Joker furrows his absent eyebrows and looks up to the ceiling in thought. "Hmm… It's wrong huh? Well I wish someone would have told me that sooner." He busts out laughing and I can't help but feel a pang of panic in my chest. His lack of remorse is making me a little anxious.

"Do you kill people just for fun Mr. J?"

"Yes," he grins. "I only do it because it amuses me."

"I-it amuses you?" I stuttered… damn it.

"Do you think that's wrong Dr. Quinzel?" He challenges. "Does that scare you?"

I clear my throat. "Well, it doesn't scare me but it does concern me. Amusement is not the appropriate feeling someone should have after they've committed murder."

"And…" The Joker leans back in his chair with his hands resting comfortably on the table. "In your… _opinion_ , what sort of emotions do you think would be 'appropriate?'" He air quotes the last word.

"Well, remorse for one. Then of course there's guilt, shock, panic, regret-"

"Regret?" He raises an eyebrow. "Really?"

"Yes. Regret for taking someone else's life away, that's a perfectly natural emotion to feel. Are you telling me that you have never regretted killing anyone?"

The Joker looks disinterested. "Nope." How can he say that so casually?

"Not even once?" My voice is an octave higher than it should be.

"Nope." He answers tepidly and starts picking at his nails. This conversation has clearly lost his interest.

Inside, I'm panicking right now. How can he be so casual and indifferent about killing people? Is there not an ounce of remorse somewhere in him? If there is, I need to find it. I need some glimmer of hope that this man has the potential to change.

"Mr. J, I'd like to talk more about your views on killing people."

The Joker furrows his eyebrows in annoyance and with a wave of his hand, dismisses my request immediately. He releases a sort of growl/grunt sound from the back of his throat before he speaks. "No, no, no, no, no. I don't want to talk about me anymore doctor. I want to talk about you."

I stare at him for a brief moment. "You want to talk about me?"

"Yeah. This whole 'getting to know each other' conversation is starting to feel one sided. Because that's what you said- we should get to know _each other._ "

Damn it, he has a point. I don't really want to start talking about myself right now because I'm too interested in him. And then of course there's the fact that I'm not really allowed to share my personal information him because he's too manipulative and he might use it against me somehow. But then again, there is a _huge_ part of me that really wants him to get to know me. The fact that he's interested in learning something about me right now is enough to make my heart swell. I can't fight this feeling in me that refuses to deny his request. It's almost as if I'm afraid to deny him anything. Plus, sharing some information about myself will help us establish a level of trust sooner rather than later, right? I'll just be careful that this conversation doesn't get too personal.

"Alright Mr. J, you have a point." I sit up straight and fold my hands over the table, ready for his inquisition. "What would you like to know?"

The Joker smiles and his eyes glimmer with amusement. He seems a bit surprised that I'm actually willing to cooperate and talk about myself. He obviously must be used to his other doctors redirecting him away from this topic instead of inviting him in like I'm doing now; which is probably really stupid of me but I've already somewhat rationalized my decision.

"Hmm… Where to begin." The Joker strokes his chin theatrically as he thinks. I notice the tattoo of a smile that he has on his hand for the first time. It's cute. I wonder what he looks like when he covers his mouth to sneeze or cough. I bet it looks funny. I fight against the muscles in my cheeks that are begging to pull up into a smile at the image I have of him in my head right now. My daydreaming is cut short when the Joker finally decides on a question.

"How old are you Dr. Quinzel?"

Okay, this seems safe enough. "I'm twenty-six." I answer coolly. Then I decide to push my luck. "How old are you?" I raise an eyebrow, daring him to answer.

"Nah, ah, ah, Harleen." The Joker grins and wags his finger at me. "We're not turning this into a give-and-take." I sigh resignedly and rest my chin in my left hand, waiting for his next question.

"Why did you come to Arkham? You know people have to be pretty _crazy_ to get in here. Doctors included." I smile at that last part. It's an interesting thought.

"Well as a criminal psychiatrist, this was sort of the only place in the city that I could work at. Blackgate wasn't exactly hiring full time psychiatrists; they get by just fine going through interns. And I didn't want to leave Gotham so…" I shrug my shoulders. "Here I am." Of course the reason I didn't want to leave the city is something else entirely, but he didn't ask that did he? J

"So you're a Gotham girl huh?"

"Kind of, but not really. I wasn't born here, I only moved here to go to Gotham University." He leans back in his chair and just stares at me. He looks like he's trying to figure out a complicated puzzle.

"Are you… _seeing_ anyone Harleen?" He finally asks and I have to admit that I'm a bit thrown by his question. He's asking me if I'm single! How should I play this? Should I be cool about this or act totally innocent? Damn me for not thinking about the possibility of this question coming up. I'm not ready to answer it yet because I don't have a game plan for this! Actually now that I think about it, I remember Dr. Arkham had told me that the Joker wanted to know if I was married or not but Dr. Arkham didn't answer. So I guess I should have expected him to ask me this question personally.

Ugh, how do I answer? Is it weird that I want him to think that I'm unavailable? I don't want to lie to him though… But then again, I don't want him to think that I'm some boring, lonely single person. I guess I'll just be cool about this…

"Well, if you _must_ know Mr. J, I'm sort of in between guys right now." Way to be coy Harleen…

The Joker smiles, clearly amused by my answer. "Is that so?" He asks half-heartedly and I nod in response. Then my curiosity takes over.

"What about you? Are you seeing anyone right now?" The Joker throws his head back and erupts in a fit of laughter. I stare at him with a clear question mark painted on my face. Why is my question funny?

"Oh doc," he says coming down from his laughing high. "You _are_ funny!" He giggles a bit before catching his breath again. "Jeez Harleen, I know I'm insane but I'm not crazy."

My face drops. "It's not crazy to be in a relationship with someone."

"Oh of course it is. Dating is a mind game. As a shrink you should know this better than anyone," he chides.

"Well I suppose there is _some_ truth in that."

"You have… a uh _soulmate_ don't you Harleen?"

Uh oh. Red alert! Red alert! "Of course I do. We all do."

"Have you… met him yet?" Shit. I want to lie to him and say no but I just can't bring myself to do it. I wonder if this is a typical soulmate thing or is this just me?

"Well… I'm hoping that he and I will be able to really get to know each other soon enough." It's not a lie. The Joker and I just met. We don't know anything about each other yet.

"Do you hear him a lot?" Can we please drop this topic? It's making me nervous.

"Not as often as I'd like to," I answer honestly. "I'm lucky if I understand two words from him." The Joker smiles as if he's enjoying his own private joke. I decide to turn the tables.

"What about you? Do you hear your soulmate often?" How often? What do you hear? What do you think of her? I'm dying to know!

The Joker laughs a little to himself. "Who knows. There are too many things happening in here for me to take notice." He taps his temple.

"How can you not notice her? Don't you hear her thoughts?" I ask a bit alarmed.

The Joker only shrugs. "I barely notice her." Ouch. He just stabbed me. My poor heart.

I open my mouth to speak when the orderly knocks on the door's glass window and taps his wrist at me to indicate our time being up.

"Well it looks like our time is up today Mr. J," I say as I gather up my notes together. "It was really nice talking to you today. Let's pick this up again on Friday."

"Sure doc," he smiles. "Same time and place?"

"You know it," I joke and he laughs. It's such a comforting sound; it makes me want to laugh too. But of course I won't. I only smile as I rise from my seat and exit the room.

His laughter continues long after I'm out of the room. As I walk down the halls towards my office, I hear him still. His laughter never cut off from me since I left because I can hear him in my head. I smile to myself and grip my notes a little closer to my chest. I can't wait till Friday.

* * *

 **AN: Hey guys. Sorry -once again- that it took me soooo long to update. I just finished my finals and this semester is officially over. So, now I have nothing better to do with my time but write. And I expect to be updating like crazy for the next four weeks, so please look forward to it. :)**

 **Thank you so much for reading the story thus far; it means a lot to me. Please feel free to review and comment. I read everything! I'll see you all in the next chapter.**


	9. Too Much Teasing

**Chapter Nine:**

 **Too Much Teasing**

The dark rich aroma that's emanating from the staff room's coffee machine is calling my name. I wasn't planning on having a cup of coffee this morning but this scent is irresistible. I've been meaning to cut back on my caffeine intake because lately, I feel like my body isn't functioning properly without it; so that obviously means that I should cut back on that stuff right?

Instead of continuing walking down the hallway and making my way to my office, I guiltily make a last minute sharp turn into the staff room towards that intoxicating smell. Lucky for me, no one is in line at the coffee machine so I march right up to it and pour myself a cup. These disposable coffee cups are so small. I mentally chide myself for not bringing my travel mug. It can hold a lot more in it... I shake my head a bit. Duh, Harleen, there's a reason you didn't bring it with you today, you're trying to cut back remember?

I quickly add a bit of sugar and cream to my cup so that I can move on with my day and enjoy my guilty pleasure alone in my office. As I turn to leave the room I notice that several nurses and orderlies are staring at me. A couple of them are even whispering to each other; what's that about? I haven't done anything that merits work place gossip, have I? As I leave the staff room and continue on my original path to my office I contemplate the things that I had done this past week. I suppose the only significant thing that I've done is have my therapy sessions with the Joker. Maybe they don't agree that he should be receiving treatment, or maybe they don't like that _I'm_ the one treating him. Either way, I could care less. They could have been talking about anything; who's to say that they were talking about me? So I'm just going to pretend that that little scene never happened.

When I reach my office door I tuck the papers that I had been carrying under my arm and juggle my coffee with that same hand while shuffling through my pockets with the other. I hold this awkward position for about two minutes before my keys finally decide to come out of hiding. I have a lot of pockets in my lab coat and a lot of stuff in them that I need to throw out or put away.

For a while now, I've developed this nasty new habit that I _hate,_ where I always look to my desk and feel a wave of disappointment at its emptiness. It's not that my desk is bare, it has things on it, like photos of my parents and friends, a computer, paperwork, and a cup of pens. What bothers me is that I'm really hoping that the Joker will sneak another gift in here. I'm ashamed that I actually want him to violate the facility's rules just so that I can have a small token of his affection. The thought of it happening again makes my cheeks feel warm.

I push the swelling feeling in my chest away and throw my keys and papers on my desk, plopping myself down in my chair. I take a couple of warm sips of my coffee and a thought occurs to me: I never thanked him for the flowers. Should I? I feel like it's something that I shouldn't bring up. But I want him to know that I appreciated the gift. …so that maybe he'll grace me with another…

Stop it Harleen! What happened to being indifferent towards his flirtations? I can't -in any way- let him know that I'm interested in him as a man; that would be disastrous. I have a feeling that if he knew, he would laugh and never let me live it down. But then again, he _is_ my soulmate. That means he wouldn't be able to resist reciprocating my feelings right? Ugh this train of thought is scary. Logic is on my side but for some reason my heart is insistent on doubting it. A part of me feels like the Joker is above all of this soulmate stuff; like none of it affects him at all. I hope that isn't the case because I'm not above this. The Joker's presence and words affect me more than I'd like them to. If the day ever comes where he realizes the depth of the connection that we share and he rejects it, I hate to say that it would break my heart.

I take a calming sip of my coffee and imagine the drink dissolving my worries and washing away this unwelcome topic. I don't want to think about that stuff right now because I don't want to start my day out on a low note.

I turn my attention towards the morning paper that I had picked up on my way to work. It's been a long while since I've taken the time to read The Gotham Times paper. I've been in my own little bubble lately that I've forgotten that there are people out there with bigger problems than I've got.

My eyes scan the front page and the highlight of the entire paper seems to be that the Batman has saved the city -yet again- from another cunning and monstrous villain. I get that this is important news to know but should this kind of information still be front page worthy? The Batman saves the city all the time and it kind of gets boring hearing about it every single time. Don't get me wrong, I appreciate the work he does, but I don't need to read about every single one of his victories. Am I the only one who feels this way? Doesn't the press get tired of writing about the same guy every day?

With a heavy sigh I turn to the page of the article anyway. I read the first couple of paragraphs before my interest is lost. I got the gist of it though. Apparently, the Batman brought into custody this elite sniper assassin known as Deadshot; what a stupid name. Where do these villains come up with these names? If I were a villain, I'd choose a cool name; one that people would never forget. I can't think of anything cool right now but it's not like this is something I have to think about. I'm no villain, and I'll never be one; Thank God.

I turn the page to the celebrity gossip section and I'm rewarded with a picture of the handsome and rich Bruce Wayne. I'm not going to lie; I've always had a little crush on him. But who doesn't? Amber had a bigger crush on him then I did though. I remember she told me once that if she wasn't already in love with the voice in her head, then nothing would stop her from making the billionaire her's. She was very confident about it and I admired that.

The article talks about how Mr. Wayne was spotted with yet another beautiful damsel on his arm. No surprise there. This guy changes girls like I change clothes. Even if someone like me were to get his attention, I wouldn't be able to hold it for very long. He'd quickly move on to the next skirt that catches his eye.

On that thought I turn a couple of pages until I reach the financial news. Ugh, our economy is terrible… I turn the page to the culinary section and read about today's daily recipe. There are very precise instructions on how to make a chicken pot pie. It looks really yummy. I wonder if Guy would appreciate eating something like this. I suppose I could give it a try, even though this recipe seems a bit advanced. I'm no stranger to cooking. I know my way around the kitchen; it's just been a while since I've had to cook for anyone other than myself. When I cook for myself, I already know what I like, so I don't have to second guess adding anything. And plus, if I mess up, I don't mind because it's not embarrassing if I'm the only one who has to eat it. But when I cook for others I have to really think about what I'm doing and the pressure to get it right is greater.

Despite all that, I think I'm going to try this tonight anyway. I remember how Guy had mentioned that he wanted to eat a home cooked meal and to be honest, I do too. We've been eating way too much take-out and it would be really nice to sit down and have a traditional meal without all of the brown bags and plastic utensils.

With that in mind, I rip out the recipe from the paper and fold it. Then, I shove it into one of my inside pockets. Damn it! I have to stop doing that. I really need to clean out these pockets because I swear, sometimes it feels like it takes me an hour to find what I'm looking for. I'm too lazy to do it now, but I swear I'll do it soon.

I close the newspaper and set it to the side to recycle later. I take my final sip of coffee and then toss the cup in the trash. I idly shuffle through the other papers that I had brought to kill my time when I'm interrupted by an alluring and inviting voice.

 _Harleen. Harleen._

I sit up immediately in my chair at the sound of his rich voice. It's almost as if he's purposefully calling to me.

 _Come on Dr. Quinzel. It's play-time._

I look over to the clock on my wall and see the little hand almost pointed at twelve and the other is pointed at ten. He's right. It's time for some therapy.

* * *

"What's up boys? How's it going?" I ask the orderlies outside the therapy room.

"Hey Harleen," says Lyle. "Still here huh?" Obviously.

"Yup." I turn to orderly number two. "Have you paid Lyle his thirty yet?"

They both laugh. "Of course I did Dr. Quinzel. I'm a man of my word."

I smile. "That's good to know. Next time you bet, I'll do my best not to let you down."

"Oh trust me Quinzel, you won't cuz I'm going to make sure that a little birdie lets you know what's going on beforehand." Lyle and I laugh. I barely know this guy but somehow the 'cheater' characteristic seems to fit him perfectly.

I'm still laughing when I turn the knob and open the door to the therapy room. "Alright boys, I'll see you in a bit," I say to the orderlies before shutting the door behind me. I turn to find the Joker staring at me, deadpan. My smile disappears immediately at the sight of him. I hope he isn't in an uncooperative mood today. He sounded so eager to start our session just a moment ago.

I move to take my seat across from him and plaster a smile on my face. "Good afternoon Mr. J. How are you doing toda-"

"You were laughing out there. What was so funny?" His voice is calm but it is not soothing. I can detect a definite undertone of malice hidden in it.

I shrug. "I was just goofing around with the guys."

"Do you think they're funny?" Where is this going?

"Well one of them is. The other… not so much. He kind of annoys me actually; I have no idea why. He hasn't done anything to me."

There's a brief moment of silence before the Joker breaks it. "Which one is the funny one?"

I open my mouth to answer but then close it immediately when I realize that I don't have a name to give him. I still haven't bothered to ask the second orderly for his name yet, and this is only going to get more awkward the longer I wait. But anyway, the undertone of his voice is really concerning me. I have a bad feeling about it; so much so that I don't want to tell him which one it is.

"It really doesn't matter Mr. J. Can we get started now?"

He says nothing. _Great_ …

I sigh with a bit of obvious frustration. I don't want to go through this again. I don't want to have another conversation where I'm pulling teeth. So I decide to just tackle whatever issue is happening right off the bat. "Is something bothering you Mr. J? Do you want to tell me what it is?"

He's silent for a moment and then decides to respond. "…I don't like that you're getting chummy with my guards."

"Why not?" I ask. I don't see the harm in it.

His face scrunches up as though he's disgusted by something. "They're not funny. So they shouldn't be able to make you laugh like that."

I think back to my conversation with the orderlies. It's not like we were having a super hilarious discussion. I barely even laughed, and when I did, it wasn't exactly because I found either of them funny. It was more of a polite/amused kind of laugh.

"Mr. J I was only being polite," I assure him. "Does it bother you when other people laugh at jokes that aren't yours?"

"…No. I appreciate good comedy when I hear it," he says thoughtfully.

"Then why do you feel upset in this particular case?"

He remains silent and stares at me without really looking at me. His mind is somewhere else, lost in thought. After a while, he finally speaks. "You shouldn't waste your time with those nobodies Dr. Quinzel. Mediocrity is contagious you know."

Mediocrity? Nobodies? "You don't think highly of those two, do you?"

"No," he growls.

"Why is that?"

The Joker rolls his eyes and sighs. "…There are… _two_ types of people in this world; the ones that entertain… and those who observe." He points to the door. "Those two are observers. Now observers are fine and good, entertainers like _me_ need an audience. The problem is… that those two have convinced themselves that they are entertainers… and they _need_ to be put back in their place. So don't encourage them with your _politeness_ Dr. Quinzel. It's doing them no good."

Hmm… What an interesting perspective. I jot down some notes in my notebook. "…I see."

The Joker leans forward towards me. His eyes squint and his face twists into one of disgust. "Phonies are the worst aren't they?"

I can't help but smile. Both because he looks adorable right now and because he has a point. Phony people _are_ the worst. However, as a psychiatrist, I'm not sure that I'm allowed to think that way. "Well, there is some truth to that Mr. J." He leans back and smiles, content with my answer. "So, aside from the overall distain for your guards, is everything else all right with you? You're doing well, is what I mean to ask."

The Joker reclines further into his seat and stretches his arms over the table. "Oh I'm _peach_ y Dr. Quinzel. Thank you for asking. You're so thoughtful."

"Well, it's my job to be. They don't pay me to sit here and look good." The Joker cackles at my comment.

"Oh, if they did… trust me, you'd be making the most money in this place."

I automatically smile and feel my cheeks warm, but I quickly regain my composure and change the subject. "So… Is there anything in particular that's on your mind today? Anything that we need to discuss?"

He looks to the tiny window in the room, expressionless. "What's going on out there?"

I'm assuming he wants to know if anything news worthy has happened in the city recently. "Not much really. The city has been pretty quiet since you've been in here."

The Joker slowly turns to me wearing a mischievous smile. "Do you think they _miss_ me doc?"

"I hate to break it to you Mr. J, but I really doubt that they do," I say with compassion.

The Joker chuckles. "I'm sure someone out there does."

He sounds as though he knows with certainty that someone is waiting for him to get out of here. "Do you have someone waiting for you? Someone you know?"

"I do. And I know _he_ misses me. Oh he's probably just _dy_ ing to see me," he grins.

"Who is this man? Someone related to you?"

"Oh you could say that. I can never really _relate_ to anyone; but with him, I could. He and I are cut from the same cloth."

"You like this person," I comment.

"I supp _osssse_ …" He dragged out the word thoughtfully. "…But you know, I'd like him a lot more if he were to just let me in. But of course where would the fun be if it were _that_ easy."

"I'm sorry Mr. J, but I have no idea what you're talking about. You lost me."

"That's all right dear. I wouldn't expect someone like you to understand our relationship anyway."

Someone like me? What the hell is that supposed to mean? Is he calling me stupid? "Well it's hard to keep up with you when you aren't explaining yourself properly. If you would elaborate, then I'm sure that I would have no trouble understanding."

The Joker growls, "I don't want to talk about him anymore."

What? But I want to know more about this mystery man… Everyone has their own pace Harleen. We'll come back to this topic again one day. "Alright. That's fine. If you don't mind, I'd like to ask you a question." He says nothing, so I assume that means yes. "In our last session, you said that you enjoyed killing people. Why is that exactly?"

The Joker crosses his arms. "In the last moments of a person's life, they let you know just how pathetic they are. I think it's hilarious when people pretend to be tough and macho and at the very end… you see just how vulnerable they really are. There's nothing funnier than that. Have you ever seen it Harleen?"

"No. I've never watched someone die."

"Would you like to?" He practically jumps in his seat with his eyes so full of hope and excitement.

To be honest, that is something I'd like to see. Professionally speaking of course. As a psychiatrist, I would love to study the state of mind of someone on the brink of death, but is that something that I should share with him? "…No, that isn't something that I would be interested in seeing because no matter how I look at it, the circumstance that you're describing has to do with murder and that is illegal."

The Joker leans forward, smiles, and cocks his head to the side. "You hesitated."

I blink a couple of times, taken aback by his observation. "What?"

"You hesitated in answering my question doc."

"What? I did not," I protest and the Joker's grin only stretches further.

"You did! _You_ hesitated, and do you know what that means Dr. Quinzel?" I say nothing and he continues anyway. "That means that you really _do_ want to see it."

"It does not!" My voice is several octaves higher than it should be. "If I wanted to, I would have told you."

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no," he wags his finger wildly at me. "I'm smart enough to know, doctor, that you wouldn't share that kind of desire with a patient like me. There was really only one answer that you could give." He closes his eyes as if he's soaking in something from the atmosphere. "Ah… but your hesitation… says _everything_."

"Mr. J, cut it out! I don't want to watch someone die okay?"

The Joker leans back in his seat, arms crossed with a huge smirk plastered across his lips. "Fine. Whatever you say _doc_ to _r._ " He winks and then speaks in a hushed voice. "Don't worry. This will be our little secret."

I sigh heavily and roll my eyes at him. There's no point in protesting any further. He's already convinced himself that he's right. "Well I can see that there is no point in talking you out of this delusion, so will you at least promise me that you won't do anything with this information?"

The Joker places his hand over his chest and wears a shocked expression, as though I've greatly offended him. "Harleen! I would never dream of it. What sort of man do you take me for? Do you really think that I would kill someone and force you to watch?" He crosses his arm and returns to his original position… but not without winking first.

"No. Don't do that," I warn.

"Do what?" He grins.

"Don't wink Mr. J."

"I didn't wink at you."

"Yes you did!"

"Harleen… I didn't wink at you. But if you'd like me to…"

Oh I give up! There is no point in arguing with this man. I sigh exasperated and lean my forehead into my hand. "Please stop trying to be cute Mr. J. This is getting us nowhere."

The Joker gasps theatrically. "Dr. Quinzel… You think I'm cute?" I shoot him an annoyed look and he responds with his infamous cackle. "You know; I think _you're_ pretty cute too doc."

Ignoring how good that last sentence makes me feel, I hold on to my annoyance and roll my eyes at him. He's making fun of me, and I'm done entertaining him. I start gathering my papers together. "Well, I think we're done for the day. I'm ending this session here. I've got other things I need to do anyway."

"Ohhh come now _doc_ tor. Things were just getting interesting." Yeah, for you maybe. I ignore him and rise from my seat to exit the room. With my hand on the door, I hear him say, "I'll see you next week Harleen."

* * *

I actually did it! I went to the supermarket when Guy stepped out and I got the things I needed to make a chicken pot pie. I've got two in the oven right now and they're going to be finished any minute now; I just have to keep an ear out for the _ding_.

So far, our apartment is coming together nicely. We still have a couple of boxes stacked up in odd places but the place isn't as claustrophobic as it was before. While the pies were baking, I unpacked and washed all of our boxed silverware and dishes. I grab a matching set that my mom had given me way back when, and place them on the table opposite each other. If we're going to eat a home cooked meal, then we should get the full dinner experience right? I have place mats set up and everything; the whole setting looks really nice.

A soon as I finish setting up the table, Guy comes through the front door. He stops in his tracks immediately when the scent from the oven reaches his nose. "What smells so good? Are you cooking?" He turns the corner to see that I have set the table for us to eat. "Woah… You _did_ cook! What're we having?" He takes his seat at the table.

"Chicken pot pie, as soon as it's done. I found the recipe in the Gotham Times and I just had to make it. It looked so good."

"Well it smells amazing Harleen, I can't wait to eat. I'm starving."

When the oven finally sounds, I pull out the pies and am satisfied by their beautiful golden brown color. Guy is over the moon with joy. He could not be happier that I decided to cook tonight.

We're both so hungry that once we started digging in, we really didn't say much half way through our meal. But once our hunger settled and we stopped eating like savages, our conversation picked up again.

"So, I've got some crazy good news to tell you," says Guy between bites.

"Oh? What's up?"

Guy stops chewing for a moment and looks me dead in the eyes. "I met her."

I furrow my eyebrows in confusion. "Met who?"

"Her." He taps his temple with his finger. "I met _her_."

I drop my fork and my jaw practically falls to the floor. "Y-you met her?"

Guy wears a huge wolfish grin. "I did."

"Oh my gosh… Tell me everything! When did this happen?! How did it happen?!"

"Alright, alright. Calm down-"

"Calm down? Guy, how can I calm down when you just told me that you've met your soulmate?! This is amazing! I'm so happy for you!"

Guy pretends to be annoyed. "Well you don't have to be so loud. I'm right here."

I ball up my napkin and throw it right at his face. "Tell. Me. Everything."

Guy chuckles. "Alright. So, I stopped at our usual bar to have a drink with a couple of buddies of mine from undergrad and-"

"Wait a minute. You stepped out for drinks just now? I thought you went to Wal-Mart."

"I did," he says, confused.

"So, you're telling me that your story didn't happen today?"

"No it happened yesterday." I grab his napkin, ball it up and throw it at his face again. "Jeez, what was that for?"

"Why didn't you tell me yesterday, you jerk!?"

"Well, you were sleeping when I got home, and I wasn't going to wake you."

I sigh. "Guy that information is _super_ important. That's the kind of news that I want to be woken to."

"Relax Harleen. Doesn't it count for anything that I'm telling you right now?"

"No, because you also could have told me on the way to work this morning."

"I was half asleep!"

I fold my arms. "That's no excuse Guy."

He shrugs. "Well what can I say? It's not that I wasn't really happy and psyched by the experience, but I just didn't feel the need to scream it from the mountain tops."

I guess I can understand that. I mean, I didn't tell anyone anything when I found out who my soulmate was. I still haven't told a soul. So who am I to judge?

"Okay, fine. I forgive you. Now tell me everything!"

"Alright, so I was out having drinks, and then all of sudden, I hear a familiar voice, right in my ear. I knew it was her immediately but I thought I was hearing her in my head. Then I turn and see this beautiful red-head standing right next to me. She speaks to the bartender again and that's when I _know_ it's her."

"Aww! What did you do?"

"Honestly, I watched her for a while."

"You creep!" I laugh.

"Well, I was shocked! I couldn't believe it and I didn't even know what to say. It wasn't until she finished her drink and started getting up to leave that I finally reacted without thinking about it."

"What did you say?"

"I said, 'Wait, miss. I don't mean to be rude, but do you know who I am?' It was right then that I could tell that she recognized my voice; her eyes got all big. She couldn't believe it. She was just as shocked as I was. We chatted for a bit but then she had to go. She had a really early meeting so she needed to get home and get to sleep."

"Did you get her number? Did you guys talk about meeting up again?"

Guy rolls his eyes. "Of course Harleen, I'm not stupid. I have her number and we're going to see each other tomorrow."

"You're going on a date?! Aww, my little boy has finally grown up," I tease.

Guy rolls his eyes again. "Shut up mom…"

I'm quiet for a moment while I let all of this new information sink in. Guy goes back to clearing his plate. I can't believe that he found his soulmate! I am beyond happy for him.

"So, have you guys been texting since then?" I ask after a while.

"Of course. She sends me these cute little messages every now and then."

I am beaming with joy. I like what I'm hearing! "What does she say?"

"I'm not telling you."

"Ugh, why not?"

"Because the messages aren't for you. They're for me, and I don't feel like sharing."

I'm practically whining. "Come on! I want to know more."

"Nope."

What a jerk… If he was a girl, I wouldn't even have to ask all of these questions. He would tell me everything and _show_ me everything right from the start. Oh, why did I have to move in with a boy? He's no fun… I still love him though.

"Fine. I _suppose,_ I will respect your privacy."

"Thank you," says Guy around a mouthful.

"Your welcome." I look down at my plate and start poking what little food is left with my fork, absentmindedly. In a low voice, I say out loud to myself, "…But, if your phone should one day just happen to be left out unattended…"

Guy looks up and eyes me suspiciously. "You wouldn't."

I shrug my shoulders. "I'm not saying that I would, but you shouldn't tempt me…"

"…I'm changing my password." Like that'll stop me. I'll find a way.

By the time we finish eating Guy and I are grinning like goofballs. We continue to tease each other until I finally have the last laugh when I force him to do the dishes. It's his punishment for being a jerk to me.

Despite his uncooperative behavior, I really do hope that this girl makes Guy happy. But then again, she _is_ his soulmate, so how could she not? I can't wait to meet her! But with the way Guy is right now, I doubt he'll introduce her to me anytime soon… Oh well, I'm not going to press him about anything that has to do with her anymore. If he wants to share something with me, he will. And if he doesn't, he won't. I'll do my best to respect that. Because after all, I'm withholding much worse information from him. So I shouldn't be such a hypocrite.

Anyway, I wish those two the best of luck, and I can't wait to find out what their future holds. Perhaps their relationship will be so good, that it will fill me with hope and determination for what my relationship can someday be like. I hope that one day I can sit down and tell Guy everything about Mr. J. But for now, I'll just have to keep quiet and work my hardest to cure my soulmate of his insanity so that we can have a relationship that is as open and as pure as anyone else's.

* * *

 **AN: Hey everyone! Thank you so much for reading this far, I appreciate it very much. Happy New Year to everyone; I hope this year is awesome and better than the last. Please don't forget to comment and review; I love your feedback! I'll see you all in the next chapter! :D**


	10. Mutual Feelings

**Chapter Ten:**

 **Mutual Feelings**

It's been five weeks since my first session with the Joker. We've had sixteen therapy sessions since and I think I'm beginning to understand the way he thinks. …Well, to be honest, I don't think anyone will truly ever understand the way his mind works, but I'm beginning to pick up on the things that he likes and the things that he doesn't like. Sometimes, if I'm lucky, I can even predict what kind of snide remark he'll use as an answer to certain questions. This is a skill that I've been trying my very hardest to perfect because I am sick and tired of leaving openings in our conversations where he finds the opportunity to mess with me and -too often- make fun of me. We have had incredible conversations where I have found myself completely fascinated by him and utterly awe-struck be his theories and observations. But for some reason whenever I try to express my interest in him as a person, I end up walking out of the room with my feelings hurt. And don't get me wrong, it's not that I've ever tried to profess my love for him or anything as deep as that; I simply try to empathize with him and explain that I understand the things that that he's explaining to me. Every time I try to meet him at his level, he always nudges me away with his jokes; that are usually at my expense. If I were not a trained psychiatrist, I would think that he has no interest in me getting close to him. But because I _am_ a trained psychiatrist, I know that he is pushing me away for a reason; he's protecting himself from me. Why? I still haven't figured that out. I want to believe that it's because he's afraid to fall in love, but I don't want to be gullible and assume my favorite theory. Until I figure out the real reason, I'm going to stay on the defensive side. When I figure it out, that's when I'll attack and worm my way into being his confidante.

"…Oh I'm sorry, have I bored you dear?" The Joker sits with one ankle resting over his knee, staring at me expectantly. He has a smile plastered on his face, but I know that there is malice hidden behind it. If there's one thing he _hates,_ it's being ignored. He can't stand it when the attention isn't solely on him. I chose the worst possible time to have my inner contemplation.

I quickly try to remedy my actions. "I'm sorry Mr. J. It's just that what you're telling me is a lot to take in. I'm trying to rack my brain around it all."

"Oh really?" The Joker uncrosses his legs, scoots his chair back under the table, and leans in closer to me on his elbows. "Which part of what I said was… _too hard_ for my little Quinzel to understand?"

I don't bother shooting him a look of annoyance because I'm already on bad territory. I try to remember what he was talking about before my mind drifted off. "Umm… the stuff about… moral degradation…" Crap, I knew that was wrong as soon as I said it. I pulled that answer out of my ass; I can't, for the life of me remember what he was talking about.

"Moral degradation huh? … _Tsk, tsk, tsk_. Wrong answer Harleen." The Joker wags his finger at me. I hate that I'm letting him down, and I'm really angry at myself for not paying attention to him. These sessions are the highlight of my week, why wasn't I paying attention?

"You know, being that you're a _psychiatrist,_ I should think that I automatically have your undivided attention, shouldn't I?"

"You do. I swear that you do, Mr. J. This was my one and only slip up, I promise."

The Joker scoffs and leans back into his chair, crossing his arms. He looks really annoyed.

"I really am sorry Mr. J. Is there any way that I can make it up to you?"

The Joker's eyes meet mine and a slow smile stretches across his lips. _Crap_ … Maybe I shouldn't have said that. I'm not getting a good feeling from his expression.

"Why as a matter of fact, there is a way…" The Joker leans over the table and curls his finger at me, telling me to come closer.

My heart thumps wildly in my chest as I do as I'm told; My face is inches from his! In all the time that we've been together, I have _never_ been this close to him. He and I have never even had any physical contact whatsoever. It was against the rules. But having him this close to me right now is really clouding my mind from all judgment of right and wrong.

"I'm going to tell you a secret Harleen," he whispers in my ear, his breath sends shivers down my spine. And I can swear that I felt him sniff my hair for a brief moment. "I want to get out of here. Will you help me?" My eyes widen with horror and I pull back immediately. He wants to escape. Does he honestly believe that I would help him do that? I want him to stay here and get the help that he needs. Granted, that I don't believe he's entirely insane. The guy makes too much sense sometimes, but there's still the huge problem of his enjoyment in the murder of innocent people that still needs to be dealt with. I can't let him out on the streets yet. No way.

"Mr. J… What you're asking me to do is something very serious. I could have you thrown in lock-up for even suggesting it…"

The Joker raises his alabaster eyebrow at me. "Is that a threat… _doc_ tor?"

The tone of his voice scares me. "Of course not." I answer immediately.

The Joker breaks the intense atmosphere by laughing his genuine laugh; there's no dark hidden malice in it whatsoever, just general amusement. "That's too bad. Things would have gotten really fun if you did." Yeah… fun for _him_ , I'm sure…

I straighten myself out in my seat, acting as though the previous scene didn't affect me at all. I absolutely _loath_ this power he has over me. I hate that he can make me feel so dumb-struck in love one minute, and then completely frightened of him the next. It's frustrating! No man should ever be given this much power over anyone; let alone his own soulmate. Perhaps I only feel these emotions so intensely because I'm his soulmate. When I'm around him, my resolve to remain indifferent towards his advances and remarks seems to completely vanish under his will. I hate that I have no say in how I feel. I've always been really good at controlling my emotions, but I just can't seem to do that when I'm around this man; and it is infuriating beyond anything I've experienced before. I wonder if he were to know that I was his soulmate, would he stop tormenting me this way? In these five weeks, not once have we brought up the topic of soulmates again. I'm sure that he still hasn't figured it out yet. If he had, he wouldn't be treating me like this right? Because sometimes, I swear, I feel like he tries to frighten me just because he can; because it amuses him. I'm sick and tired of it.

"I'm going to do you the favor of assuming that what you said was one of your most questionable jokes," I say sternly, adjusting my glasses.

The Joker cackles. "You call that a favor? Harleen if you really wanted to help me out, you would slide me your keys under the table."

The huge smile on his face lets me know that he's messing with me… again. I've had enough of this shit for one day. I gather my notes and rise from my seat. "I'm leaving. I don't want you to start taking this joke too seriously. I'll see you in two days Mr. J."

I start walking towards the exit when I hear him call after me. "Oh Harleen! Why do you _always_ leave when things start to get interesting? I'm starting to think that you're no fun at all..."

That stops me in my tracks. For some reason, it hurts me deeply. But I'm at a loss of words. I don't know what to say to change his opinion of me. So I just continue walking until I've shut the door behind me. Jerry the orderly -I learned his name!- regards me questionably.

"Cutting another session short doctor?"

"Yeah. He's misbehaving again." I gently tug Jerry away from the door's window and speak in a hushed voice. "Can you make sure that more orderlies are posted outside of his cell? He may be planning an escape and I don't want him pulling the slip on us."

"Of course Dr. Quinzel, I'll tell the others. Should I tell Dr. Arkham about this?"

"No not yet. This is just a hunch that I have. I don't want to bother him with this until I know something concrete. And if that time ever comes I'll be sure to tell him myself."

"Alright doc. I trust you."

I smile and pat his arm before walking away. "Thanks Jerry."

* * *

The ceiling to my apartment is so very white, and boring. Why don't people ever decorate their ceilings? This is excruciating. If I had any artistic skills, I would grab a brush and some paint and get to work immediately. I don't even care if a painted ceiling would throw off the décor of the room; I need something interesting to stare at for those days -like today- when I'm too lazy to angle my head in any other direction.

Right now, I'm lying flat on my back on the couch in my living room. Sick of staring at my blank ceiling, I flip to my side and let my eyes take in the room around me. The apartment has really come together nicely in the past weeks. I managed to merge Guy's stuff nicely with my own. I'm glad that there isn't a cardboard box in sight; I was getting sick of looking at them, so one day, I forced Guy to help me finish unpacking, and now we're officially moved in.

Speaking of Guy, I've been seeing less and less of him these days. Ever since he met his soulmate, he's had less and less time for me. If it weren't the fact that we work together, I don't think that we would see each other at all. He still gives me a ride to and from work, but as soon as he drops me off at home, he runs off and scurries to his girlfriend. He always gets home really late too, most of the time, after I've already gone to bed. Sometimes he doesn't even come home at all. I'm really happy for him; truly I am. It's just that I've been so lonely lately. I don't have anyone to talk to anymore. The friends that I had aren't in Gotham anymore, not many people talk to me at work, and the Joker is keeping me at an arm's length. I'm craving some sort of human connection right now; someone to talk to.

I look to the window on the far side of the room. Maybe I should go out. I could go to a local bar and meet some new people. But I'm only interested in making new friendships. If I go to a bar by myself, then I'll only attract unwanted attention from people that I have no interest in getting to know. I guess I should just lay here and wallow in my self-pity then…

Maybe I should get a pet. If I got a dog, then I could always look forward to having someone greet me every time I come home. That would be really nice. But then I'd have to walk him and most days I'm too busy to do anything out of my routine. So I guess I should scratch that idea… Maybe a cat would be better. But don't they scratch and pee on everything? I suppose I could always get it declawed but that seems kind of mean to me. Ugh, forget it. Why bring another soul into this lonely apartment. It probably wouldn't make much of a difference here anyway.

 _Click._

What was that?

I sit up straight and look around to see where that noise came from. I can hear some shuffling sounds coming from the kitchen. I get up to investigate but when I get to the kitchen, no one is there and nothing seems amiss. Am I going crazy now? Do I have to add another grievance onto the many others that I already have?

Oh well, I guess so. I shrug my shoulders and turn to leave the room when I'm encountered by a tall dark figure that surprises me too much to register him as anything other than an intruder. I scream and grab and throw the closest thing near me- which just so happens to be a banana from the fruit bowl on the counter. I've got good aim though; it bonks him right on his head.

"Jesus Harleen! What the hell has gotten into you?"

"Oh my goodness! I'm so sorry Guy! I thought you were a burglar or something. Are you okay? Did I hurt you?"

Guy pulls out a seat from the table and sits down. "Of course I am silly. I don't know how much damage that you think a banana could do to a person."

I scoff. "Hey, they can do more damage than you think. Have you ever played Mario Kart?"

Guy laughs and I grab the banana off of the floor beside him. Why waste good food? I unpeel the fruit and have at it before the bruise from my throw sets into it. "So, why are you here so early?" I say around a mouthful of banana. I don't have to watch my manners around Guy. He doesn't care.

"What do you mean I'm early? Have I been staying out late or something?"

I gape at him. "Are you kidding me right now? Guy, you're never home these days. To and from work is the only time I get to see you."

Guy rolls his eyes. "Don't exaggerate Harleen. We see each other all of the time."

I gape at him again and mouth the word "wow" before going back to finishing my banana. This boy is sprung. He's so caught up in his love life, he can't even keep track of how much of his time is occupied by it.

"Well anyway, are you busy right now?"

I look down at myself and gesture to my old Aerosmith t-shirt and jogging pants. "Do I look busy? These are my stay at home clothes Guy."

He looks a bit disappointed. "Does that mean that you're not in the mood to leave the house?"

"Why, do you want to do something?" I sound a little too hopeful.

"Yeah actually. I was wondering if you wanted to have dinner tonight with Sarah and me."

"Wait. You _and_ Sarah? You want me to meet her?" I ask enthusiastically.

"Yeah, well… She asks about you a lot. I told her that you're like a sister to me and now she really wants to meet you."

"Aw, how sweet! Of course I want to meet her too. I've wanted to meet her since day one."

"Alright. I'll text Sarah right now and let her know that you're in."

"Cool. I'm gonna go change!" Yay! This'll be the most fun I've had in a long time.

* * *

Guy and I arrive at the restaurant early. He sits opposite me and continuously looks from his menu to the door.

"Jeez Guy, is everything alright?"

Guy looks at me confused. "Yeah. Why?"

"Well, you keep checking out the door. Are you nervous or something?"

"No. I just… I feel bad for not picking Sarah up from her job. I offered, but she insisted on taking the bus. I just hope she gets here okay."

Aw, Guy is the sweet, protective type. Sarah is a _very_ lucky girl. Under different circumstances, I would worry whether or not she was good enough for him; but she's his soulmate so of course she is.

As if on cue, a red headed woman walks through the door and heads straight to the host asking about a table under the name Kopski. When Guy notices her, his eyes light up and he immediately calls out her name to grab her attention. "Sarah! Over here."

Her eyes mimic Guys when she notices him. She waves off the host and maneuvers her way over to us wearing a huge beaming smile.

She is adorable! She's a petite woman with short bobbed red hair. She's wearing a long sleeved black blouse and a very cute beige skirt. She practically skips over to Guy who stands up immediately to welcome her in his embrace.

They both look so _good_ together. You don't even have to ask if they're soulmates or not; You can tell just by looking at them. They're perfect; they complement each other perfectly.

For a moment, it seems like they've forgotten that I'm in the room. But to be honest, in that same moment, _I_ forgot that I was in the room too. I'm so enthralled by them that I don't even realize how much of a dork I must look like, sitting here wearing a huge grin and just gawking at them.

Guy eventually pulls away from Sarah to let her slide into the booth. Sarah regards me with a welcoming smile. "Hi." She extends her arm to shake my own. "I don't know if you heard, but I'm Sarah." She jokes.

I shake her hand and return her smile. "Oh, trust me, I know who you are. I've been dying to meet you, but mean ol' Guy here has been keeping you all to himself."

"That's because I know how girls are. Pretty soon you two are going to team against me and cause me even more problems than you each do individually."

Sarah and I laugh and she smacks him on the arm.

"You know what Guy?" I say. "We're going to start teaming up right now. Sarah, ignore this doofus and ask me anything you want to know about him."

Sarah's eyes practically sparkle. "Oooh, I want to hear the most embarrassing story you know about him!"

"What?! Harleen you better not say a damn thing." Guy warns.

"Oh, I have just the story in mind. You're going to love it! It's about when I sent Guy to go buy me some tampons."

Sarah laughs and leans in closer, eager to hear more. Guy turns a soft shade of pink and kicks me under the table. Of course, that does nothing to stop me. I tell Sarah _everything_ ; and by the end of the story. She and I are beside ourselves with laughter. Guy joins in our giddiness because I guess seeing us get along so well just puts him in a good mood; even if it is at his expense.

Dinner goes swimmingly. Sarah is an amazing person. She has a very calm personality and a great sense of humor. She's seen so much of the world. Up until recently, she had been living in France. Of course I made her tell me _everything_ about the country. Who hasn't dreamed of living in France?

She and Guy stay in constant contact the whole night. Whether it was a casual caress or simply brushing shoulders; the two were inseparable… and very much in love. It takes only one glance to see that they care deeply for each other. And to think, they've only known each other for about a month and a half now. They're so close… Isn't that how it should be with all soulmates? If so, then why aren't the Joker and I like them. I've known my soulmate longer than Guy's known his and Guy is _way_ closer to his than I am with mine. It's true that there are reasons why we can't be that close. Those reasons being that he is my patient and I am his doctor and we have to maintain a professional relationship. But still, even so, we're allowed to have a connection. I feel that as two people, he and I are not on the same wavelength. We're never on the same page and lately we really haven't been getting along well. I'll be honest, I do feel _something_ between us that pulls me in, but I'm not sure that he feels it too.

This whole situation is too disheartening. After watching Guy and Sarah together, I'm starting to _really_ question the relationship that I have with the Joker. He's my soulmate; I know he is because I recognize his voice in my head. I haven't heard it in weeks but that's not really surprising because I've gone longer without hearing it. I just wish that I could hear him now so that I can be reassured that he's the _one_. But of course, even in this area of our relationship the Joker has to be uncooperative.

Why is he so different? Why can't he look at me the way Guy looks at Sarah. When Guy looks at Sarah, it's like she's the only girl who exists in his world. It does make me feel lonely but it also makes me feel really happy for him too. I just wish that the Joker would give me some hint that he's as interested in me as I am in him. A simple love-sick glance or a few sweet words would definitely do. I guess what I want most right now is to feel loved. I have my soulmate, and yet I've never felt more alone and unloved in my life.

When dinner is done, Guy drops me off at the apartment and then drives Sarah home. I go straight to my room and lay awake on my bed. I just can't shake this feeling in me. There's something about the Joker and I that just isn't right. Guy and Sarah are not the only pair of soulmates that I've seen. Whenever I see other people interacting with their soulmates, they always have this romantic love-sick atmosphere about them. What the Joker and I have isn't normal.

Hmmm…. I roll over on my bed and grab my laptop from my bedside table. I want to do some research.

I remember in high school, there was a website that everybody used to answer all of the questions that they had about how the whole soulmate relationship worked. I never used it because I couldn't even hear my other voice until I was twenty; so as far as I was concerned, I didn't have a soulmate.

I type in the name that I remember in the search engine and then click on the first link that takes me straight to the site. Okay… let's see… _The Other Voice and You,_ no. _My Thoughts Aren't Private?,_ no. _Someone Destined for Me,_ no. _Finding Your Other Half,_ no; I found mine already. _The Soulmate Connection,_ yes! _Click!_

Alright, let's see…

 _The connection that you have with your soulmate is a deep one…_ skip, skip, skip. I know this already… Ah! Here we go.

… _An immediate attachment to one another is formed after the first encounter. This is an inevitable trait between soulmates._ So does that mean that the Joker is attached to me? Somehow I find that hard to believe but it says here that that sort of thing is inevitable, so he must feel _something_ for me.

 _A fierce faithful commitment to your partner is another important trait between a pair of soulmates. Infidelity is impossible._ I guess he'll never cheat on me. And if I ever wanted to move on, I wouldn't be able to…

 _The question of whether true love always blossoms between a pair of soulmates is a question that is asked often by young individuals. The idea of unconditional love existing for every person on Earth is a difficult concept to fully grasp. But rest assured, this fact is undeniably true. No records in human history recount a pair of soulmates that did not love each other immensely. We can therefore safely assume that all individuals are fated to feel nothing but a deep love for their other half. Emotions such as hatred, boredom, and mistrust do_ _not_ _exist between soulmates. Such emotions are impossible to feel towards your significant other._

Oh my gosh… I'm so happy that I read this! This means that the Joker loves me, doesn't it? It's impossible for him to ever hate me, or get bored of me; that's _super_ reassuring. We're destined to fall deeply in love with each other. I hug myself. This knowledge makes me so happy!

But what the site doesn't mention is if this love we're supposed to have blossoms immediately after meeting? What if the Joker doesn't have these feeling for me yet? Hmm… let's see, it does have more to say about the emotions in the relationship.

… _it is only normal where such things must be considered. As for the unconditional love aspect of the relationship, this is yet another true trait that exists between a pair of soulmates. An unshakeable love is the fruit of the other-worldly connection that exists between pairs. This connection plays deeply into the relationship of soulmates. Emotions are typically linked together through this connection and are shared equally by both parties. That isn't to say that if one person should feel agitated at something that transpired outside of their relationship, the other will feel that same agitation. The connection does not stem further than anything that does not concern one soulmate with the other. This simply means that any emotions that one person has for their significant other is shared by their partner. The love and adoration felt by one soulmate for the other, is mutual. The depth of love and respect that is shared between a couple grows together between both persons at the same rate. These emotions are shared equally and grow and develop stronger within a couple, the more time they put into their relationship, until a deep and undeniable love is finally understood between both parties._

Wow… So whatever I feel towards the Joker, he feels the same towards me? That concept is… really hard to grasp. We share our emotions for each other equally… I didn't know that. This changes things.

My lips pull up at the corners in a slow, smooth smile.

Oh, this definitely changes things.

If whatever I feel for the Joker is mutual, then I can use this to my advantage. Looking at this from a psychological perspective makes everything clear. The uncertainty of our relationship, the frustration of not being able to make much progress, the mixed emotions of loving someone so different from myself. These worries aren't just my own. They are equal contributions of the Joker's same emotions. He feels the exact same way that I do, but from a different perspective.

I have been uncertain about this relationship since day one; I've always tried to keep my guard up. Therefore, the Joker has also been keeping his up. He's been pushing me away and not letting me get close because I too have been doing the same to him. Whenever he asks me a question about myself that is too personal, I do my best not to answer it. Him pushing me away is also the product of the frustration at the whole relationship. Honestly, I would be lying if I said that I wasn't scared about loving a man like him. He must feel the same way. He's afraid to fall in love so he's trying to keep me at arm's length so that he can drive away the growing feeling of attachment that has been slowly and quietly developing between the two of us. And then of course the fact that we are two _completely_ different people plays greatly into this fear. I'm trying desperately to change him into being someone normal, like me. And he, in turn is doing the same. That's why he takes the time to share his theories and ideas with me; he wants me to see the world through his perspective and be more like him. Perhaps if we were to just accept the way the other is, then things could progress between the two of us. But that is the most difficult part of our relationship because it seems that neither of us is brave enough to accept the way the other is. He is a murder. Believe it or not, I don't hate him for the things he's done (apparently, I can't ever hate him…). And I'm not even phased by the gruesome things that he is capable of; they don't deter my feelings for him in the slightest. But that doesn't mean that I approve of them. How can I be with someone who so freely plays with people's lives for his own entertainment? This is the hurdle that the Joker and I need to get past. I don't know how we're going to do it, but with time, I hope we can figure it out.

For now, I suppose I could stop trying to change him. Just for a bit. After all, my job _is_ to cure him of his insanity. I still plan on doing that, I'm just going to take a different approach. I've been defensive and a bit obvious of my disapproval of some of his most… harsh perspectives. If I just _try_ to understand the appeal in his lifestyle then perhaps, in time, I could find openings where I can counter his preferences with healthier choices that are just as appealing to him. I think of it as working on the inside; going behind enemy lines to corrupt the entire system from its core. I believe this approach will progress both our standing in therapy and the conditions of our relationship.

And on that note, another thought has just occurred to me; if the Joker and I share the same emotions towards one another, then does that mean that he would get just as flustered as I do when he flirts with me? Hmmm… The thought makes me smile. I know it's inappropriate for a doctor to flirt with her patient. But perhaps trying it just once -just to prove this theory- wouldn't hurt.

* * *

Therapy time!

This morning I woke up with this surge of confidence. I can't wait to get this ball rolling. I stride into the therapy room suavely in my signature black stilettos and take my seat opposite my patient. I should also mention that I decided to wear my hair down today. Something I haven't done since I started working here. My golden waves pool over my shoulders to dangle carelessly every which way they may. I smile warmly at the Joker whose eyes widen the tiniest fraction at seeing me. If I had blinked at that moment, I would have missed it.

"Good afternoon Mr. J. How are you today?"

The Joker raises his alabaster eyebrows at me and releases a low "wow" whistle. " _Much_ better now that you're here, _doc_ tor."

I smile. "I'm glad to hear that. Shall we get started?" The Joker smiles with guarded eyes. He seems to be a bit suspicious of me today. "So, what's on your mind today Mr. J? Anything specific you want to talk about? Or should I start us off?"

"Weeellllll, aren't we eager today," The Joker breathes. "You know; I don't appreciate the extra guards you had set up outside of my cell.

I toss my hair over my shoulder. "What makes you think that I sanctioned that?"

The Joker looks at me and seems to personify the word 'seriously' without saying it.

I mask my amusement terribly. "I'm pleading the fifth on this subject."

The Joker smiles to himself. "You didn't want me leaving huh? _You_ must reeeally like me. You'd miss me if I leave, wouldn't you?" He jokes.

"I wouldn't say that," I reply coolly. "It's more like, I'd miss the chance to study someone like you." Yes, I'm lying right now.

The Joker cackles. "Oh… Dr. Quinzel, you are a _terri_ ble liar."

I prop my elbow on the table and rest my head in my hand. "Am I? Maybe _you're_ just a terrible lie detector."

The Joker erupts in laughter. "Oh, I doubt that." A couple of strands of the Joker's hair come out of place. He smooths them back into place as best as he can with both of his hands handcuffed together. He then looks at me dubiously. "What's with you today doc? You seem… different."

"Do I?" I grab a strand of my hair and look at the tips. "Maybe it's the hair?"

"No, no, no," the Joker says hurriedly. "It's not _that._ You're acting different."

I shrug my shoulders. "What can I say? I woke up on the right side of the bed today."

The Joker eyes me skeptically. "Hmmm… Are you hiding something from me _doct_ or?"

I smile to myself. "Of course not."

The Joker leans back in his chair seeming half convinced.

I should probably take this opportunity to steer the conversation in a different direction. "So, Mr. J. How have you been feeling these days? It's come to my attention that you aren't currently being medicated are you? Do you feel you need medication? Have your moods been unstable recently?"

The Joker smiles and stretches his arms out over the table and towards me. He seems to bask in the feel of his lean muscles expanding in the stretch. "Oh I'm fine Dr. Quinzel. But I wouldn't mind you slipping me a drug or two anyway."

"I just might." I grab his hands quickly, without thinking; examining his fingers and palms. "Look at you, I didn't think it was possible but you seem paler. Have you been eating okay?" My concern is sincere and it made react without thinking. I'm not supposed to be touching him. When I first made contact with his skin, the Joker's entire body went stiff and he regarded me with wide cautious eyes. But he didn't pull away from my touch.

This gets me thinking… Maybe now is my chance…

I look up into the Joker's eyes and find cloudy blue orbs staring directly into mine. His stare doesn't waver and is completely undisturbed by the obstruction of his eyelids. I realize that he hasn't answered my question. "Mr. J? Did you hear me? I asked whether or not you've been eating okay." He remains silent and continues to stare at me in that strange manner. The way he looks right now… you would think that he's afraid I might hurt him. I look back at his hands held firmly in my own. I release one so that I can trace the other with my free hand. When my fingertips make contact with his palm, he flinches and blinks a couple of times.

"Look at how pale you've gotten Mr. J. And your fingers… you're skin and bones…" I say absentmindedly, continuously tracing the lines and curves of his palm. I let my fingers follow his life line and onto his veins which are fairly visible underneath his alabaster skin. Using a bit of pressure, I can feel his pulse pumping a bit too quickly; but only a bit. I lean forward a bit, keeping my hands where they are and resting my weight on my elbows. Making sure that I don't lose his pulse, I look up into the Joker's eyes which are much closer now than they were before. "Joker?" His blood pumps quicker underneath my fingertips when I say his name. "Are you alright? Your heart is racing." Keeping my eyes locked on his, I let myself smile slowly and a bit deviously at him. The Joker's eyebrows furrow immediately into a look of annoyance and he pulls his hands harshly away from my grasp. He clenches the hand than I was tracing and shoots me a frustrated look.

Ah, this is what I wanted. To see that look on his face that he always seems to bring out in me. I can see why he likes to do bring that part out of me. He looks so adorable all mad and huffy and I detect the slightest hint of embarrassment. He's too cute right now I can't help but giggle. The Joker's frustrated look grows deeper at the sound of my laughter. He leans over the table towards me and says through gritted teeth, "What's so funny, _doc_?"

His menacing look does nothing to deter me. I continue giggling to myself. I realize that the reason I can't stop my giggles is because right now, I'm happy. I'm over the moon happy. I'm completely elated. I finally have the confirmation I've been searching for. He's attracted to me. The Joker is actually attracted to me. I can affect him the way he does me. The proof was in his pulse and the adorable look on his face afterwards. Now that I know that we're on the same playing field, suddenly, his anger doesn't shake me quite as much as it did before; especially given this circumstance.

While doing a terrible job of controlling my giggles, I manage to answer him. "I'm sorry Mr. J. I swear, I'm not laughing at you. It's just that-" I stop myself to catch my breath. "I was enjoying my own little inside joke."

The Joker's alabaster eyebrows shoot up. "Oh! An inside joke," he lightly smacks his forehead. "Of course you were laughing at an inside joke. How silly of me to assume otherwise. You know, I love inside jokes Harleen. Care to share yours with me?"

I smile a bit deviously at him. "Nah. You wouldn't get it… Not yet anyway."

There's a knock at the door and after a moment, Jerry pops his head in the room. "Hey Dr. Quinzel. you're going to have to cut this session short. This week's cell checks for maximum security is going to happen earlier today because of the pipe work they're going to do on the upper levels."

"Oh alright Jerry. We're just about done here anyway." I turn to look at the Joker and smile at him once I've gathered my papers together and risen from my seat. "Mr. J, I think today's session went well. I look forward to our next one."

The Joker smiles but it doesn't touch his eyes. His eyes never leave me until I've exited the room. The guards follow into the session as soon as I step out. When I turn the corner and make sure no one is around to see me, I do a small triumphant fist pump in the air and smile to myself. Hugging my files close, my stilettos click away against the floor, leading me out of maximum security.

* * *

 **AN: Yeah... sorry for the long wait. I'm really trying people. School takes up way too much of my time. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and I swear that I'll do my best to upload the next one as soon as possible. Thanks for your cooperation and thanks for sticking with this story thus far; it means a lot to me. :)**


	11. Unexpected Gift

**Chapter Eleven:**

 **Unexpected Gift**

I cannot keep myself from laughing.

"Okay, okay, wait," I say through breathless giggles. "So you mean to tell me that the guy didn't even see it coming?"

"Nope," says the Joker with his silver toothed grin. "I came up from behind, tapped his shoulder, and **BLAM!** " He slams both hands down roughly on the table. "I sock him with a freshly baked raspberry pie."

I erupt with laughter, and the Joker joins in. His stories can be _too_ funny sometimes. He has such a comical theatrical way of dealing with things that most of the time, I can't even suppress my amusement; like right now. But of course, this always wears off when he gets to this inevitable part of his story-

"If you think the pie to the face was funny, you _can't_ even _imagine_ how hilarious the _bomb_ to the face was!" Yup. Whenever he gets to the core of the story -i.e. the actual crime- my enthusiasm drops and my concern builds for _his_ growth of enthusiasm whenever he reaches this part of the story. His eyes glimmer and his hands wave about as his mind delves further away from me and further into his memory. "It was in the pie! And when it hit - **BOOM!** Red _everywhere_! And let me tell you doc, it wasn't _all_ raspberry juice," he winks. Okay. That last bit was funny; I'll give him that.

I don't laugh, but I do smile. I'm trying to be opened minded about these things. I don't want to be judgy. "Jeez Mr. J, you have such a theatrical way of performing even the most brutal things. Is there a reason for that?"

The Joker smoothed his hair back and then shrugged. "I like to be creative. _Anyone_ can kill. But-" He pauses to wave his hand vaguely in the air; trying to come up with the right words. "It takes a _certain_ kind of person to do it in a way that hasn't been done before."

I tap my pen to my bottom lip pensively. "I see your point. Anyone can put a bullet to a brain, but a pie-bomb to the face? I have to say; I've never heard anyone do that. Well, except for maybe Tom and Jerry, or someone from Loony Tunes."

The Joker laughs heartily and it's infectious; I join in. "You're _funny_ Harleen. Has anyone ever told you that?"

I smile, amused at his comment, and prop my elbow on the table and rest my head in my hand. "No, not really. I guess you're one of the _very_ few people who sees the humor in the things that I say." Guy and Sarah are also pretty good at laughing at the things that I say; in a good way, of course.

The Joker sighs and leans back in his chair, stretching both arms over the table. "Well," he drawls. "Most people in this city have a _terrible_ sense of humor anyway. So, don't beat yourself up over it kid."

" _Thanks_ ," I say sarcastically. "I'll try not to."

So, it's been a month since I've started to feel confident about my connection with the Joker. Ever since I did that online research, I've been pretty comfortable about socializing with him. And of course the more comfortable I got, the more comfortable _he_ got. We've been getting along really well these past four weeks. He hasn't made fun of me not once! That is a _huge_ improvement in my book.

As of late, I've been doing my best to ignore the unsettling feeling in my chest that I get every time the Joker talks about something gruesome. I'm honestly trying to see things through his perspective, but it's difficult. I am getting a _little_ more comfortable with the topic, but only a little. My concern for his lost sanity prevents me from fully comprehending the thrill of brutally murdering someone. Again, I'm not trying to be judgy, I'm just saying that I don't understand the appeal. To avoid being judgmental, I've decided to avoid asking questions like, 'why do you kill people?' or 'don't you feel any remorse?' Instead, I ask questions that stimulate the conversation and keep him animated and interested. Doing this seems to work well. We've had some pretty lengthy and entertaining conversations about the strangest things. For now, I don't mind keeping this up. It's helping me bring myself closer to him.

A sudden knock on the door announces the end to our therapy session. Not quite able to believe that an hour and a half has gone by already, I check my watch on my wrist.

"Time flies, huh doc?" Says the Joker, arms crossed.

"It sure does. This session felt like it was ten minutes long." I toss my hair over my shoulder and gather up my notes. Rising from my seat and moving towards the door, I make sure to give him a good, warm smile before I leave. "Alright Mr. J, I look forward to picking this up again next time."

"Likewise, _Harleen_." He puts a bit of emphasis on my name and smiles. I smile back out of courtesy and then leave the room. The orderlies shuffle in to collect the Joker as soon as I step out.

If I am being _very_ honest with myself, I love it when he calls Harleen. It's just so much more personal and intimate than ' _doc_ '; I actually hate it when he calls me that. It really bugs me for some reason. So, I've made it a guilty pleasure of mine to allow him to call me by my first name. Under no circumstances are doctors to permit their patients to call them by their informal name, but I think that as long as no one else hears him call me Harleen, we should be fine. After all, what harm does it do to any of us? If anything, it allows us to share a more intimate relationship that will only prove fruitful in the long run. I just wish that I knew his real name too so that _I_ can use it. But I'm comforted by the fact that he told me to call him Mr. J, and that's something that no one else does; so in a way, this could be _his_ form of first name basis.

I'll take it.

After finally exiting maximum security and reaching the main floor, I have to maneuver my way through yet another series of hallways to get to the elevator that leaves me the closest to my office. I'm not particularly fond of this elevator though. The nicer, newer ones are located near the main hall entrance of the asylum; they're much faster. This elevator is very slow and outdated but my office is almost right around the corner from it. Plus, no one hardly uses it; because it's so slow…

I hit the button calling the elevator to take me up, when I hear a pair of quiet feet shuffling closer towards me. When the person's shuffling reaches the corner of the hallway behind me I turn to find the familiar face of Dr. Joan Leland greeting me with a bright smile. "Dr. Quinzel," she says pleasantly surprised. "I didn't think anyone used this elevator anymore. It's funny that I should bump into you here."

"I agree. That's the reason I use this elevator; because no one else does." Dr. Leland laughs courteously and I can't help but let my eyes drift to her stomach. "Speaking of bumps," I say pointing at her belly. "Yours is coming along nicely."

Dr. Leland smiles proudly and places a hand over her baby bump to caress it fondly. "Thank you, more and more people are starting to take notice. I'm still pretty small though, so you must have a keen eye Harleen."

I wave away the notion. "Nah. If you hadn't told me weeks ago that you were pregnant, I probably wouldn't even have noticed." The elevator finally dings and I place my hand over one side of the elevator's openings to let Dr. Leland step in first without having the doors close in on her. She thanks me and I step in after her. We each hit different buttons and wait as the elevator slowly ascends.

"So Harleen, I hear that you've been making some progress with patient 4479. I'm proud of you for sticking with his case and believing in your own abilities. I still remember the day where you first asked me to take him on as your patient. I was so frightened for you. I'm glad that I was wrong about you. It's been wonderful having you in this facility."

I smile at Dr. Leland's kind and honest words. "Aw thank you Joan. I enjoy working with you and everyone else here too. I _can't_ imagine working anywhere else."

"I know what you mean. I enjoy what I do here too. That's why I'm reluctant to take my maternity leave when the time comes. I think I'll go mad staying home and doing nothing all day."

"Ah, that's what you say now, but once you start relaxing…" I sigh blissfully. "You're going to wish that you never had to work another day in your life."

"So either way missing work will be bad for me huh? I'll either go mad or turn lazy and never want to go back. Maybe I shouldn't leave…" She teases and I laugh. Dr. Leland is a somewhat serious kind of person and I love it when she's playful. This pregnancy is having a surprisingly positive effect on her; I thought they normally did the opposite to woman…

The elevator finally dings and arrives on my floor. I turn to say a quick goodbye. "Alright Joan, I'll see you around. Take it easy okay?"

She smiles, "Thank you Harleen. I will, I promise." Then the elevator closes leaving me in the hallway alone.

Keeping my files at hand close, I start walking down the hall to reach my office around the corner. But as soon as I turn the corner, I notice that my door is ajar. I know I didn't lock it before I left, but I _did_ close it; for sure. I wonder if a certain _someone_ has _finally_ left me another present! I've been WAITING for this!

A small little voice in the back of my head is chiding me for getting so excited over someone breaking and entering into my personal space; but of course, I'm too excited to listen to it. I hurriedly tug at my clothes, making sure everything's in place, and I brush a lock of my hair away from my face with my fingertips. Why am I fixing my appearance? I have no clue. It's not like _he's_ in there; I just saw him downstairs.

I roll my eyes, annoyed at myself. I swear, sometimes, I scare myself with how love-sick I am… But then I'm comforted by the fact that he's my soulmate, so, these feelings and dumb line of thinking are unavoidable… But still! I swear I'm smarter than this!

 _Anyway_ … I practical run to my door, eager to see what's waiting for me on the other side. I swing open my door in a flash, wearing a huge excited smile-

It disappears immediately when I see Dr. Arkham sitting and waiting at my desk. He was evidently surprised by how suddenly I entered the room. He jumped slightly in his seat when I flung the door open. He obviously noticed my excitement leave my face at the sight of him because a slight apologetic smirk painted his face. "Sorry for coming in unannounced Dr. Quinzel. You were expecting someone else, I presume?"

I sigh to myself and move to close the door behind me. I mumble, speaking more to myself than to him. "Not _someone_ , just _something_ …" Realizing that I'm being rude by not addressing him properly, I speak in a clearer more direct tone. "Don't worry Dr. Arkham, it's always a pleasure to see you. Now tell me-" I move around my desk to drop myself in my seat. "To what do I owe this rare and honorable visit?"

"To yourself I suppose. I'm here to congratulate you."

I look at him puzzled. "Congratulate me? What have I done?"

Dr. Arkham smirks as though I'm missing something obvious. "I'm here to commend you on the progress that you've made with the Joker."

"Oh," I say dumbly. If I think about it though, I haven't made much progress with him; medically speaking of course. He hasn't told me anything about his past life, I haven't been able to diagnose him with anything concrete, and -most importantly- his violent outlook on life hasn't change _at all_. So, what progress is he talking about? "I'm sorry but could you be more specific doctor because if I'm being honest, I haven't made any significant progress with my patient."

"Why of course you have. You're still alive, aren't you? That's more than most of his previous doctors can say." I stare at him baffled. Is he seriously here just to congratulate me for being alive? I guess I understood it when he and Dr. Leland did it after my first session, but now? Now it just seems ridiculous; I've been the Joker's doctor for months now? Why the sudden praise?

"Well, I _guess_ , there is truth in that, but I'm afraid I still don't understand. Is that really why you're congratulating me? For still being alive?"

Dr. Arkham laughs. "Well, _that_ and there _has_ been some notable improvement in patient 4479's behavior. He's eating more, for one. And the orderlies have noticed that he's been causing less harm to himself. I don't know what you're doing, but whatever it is keep it up. I know it may seem silly to applaud your work when compared to other patients, the Joker has made very little progress; But you _must_ understand that as little as this may seem, it is a milestone when it comes to patient 4479. No one has been able to get this far as you have; and _that_ deserves praise. I just wanted to let you know that although you may not feel that your patient isn't progressing, he is; I can assure you. Slowly but surely. I wanted to make sure that you will keep doing things just as you have been. I don't want you to change tactics because you feel that your current methods aren't working. They are; so, please don't change anything."

 _Ah_ , I see now… "Well, thank you Dr. Arkham. I'll admit I'm a bit surprised by the sudden praise but, pleasantly surprised. Thank you. It feels good to have my work recognized and I really appreciate you coming over here and telling me this, it means a lot."

Dr. Arkham smiles. "Your welcome Harleen. I'm proud of the work that you're doing." He rises from his seat and I stand too because it feels rude to stay seated when he isn't. "You'll continue doing what you're doing, won't you?"

I smile assuredly. "Of course Dr. Arkham. If you think what I'm doing is working, then I promise I won't change a thing."

"Thank you," He extends his hand to me and I take it. He shakes it firmly for a good second. "I'm glad I hired you," he says proudly before releasing my hand. He turns to exit my office and says over his shoulder, "Keep up the good work Harleen."

"…Thanks." I say to the now empty room. Jeez, that was unexpected. It almost seemed like he had another reason for being here, but I have no idea what that reason is… Oh well, I'm just glad that he's happy with my work. If only he knew… What's been helping me get along with the Joker is _not_ questioning his peculiar views. It's a tactic that no psychiatrist should really take, _but_ , if that's what my boss wants then who am I to disobey?

There's a huge cheshire grin on my face from how conveniently this whole situation is working out for me. It should be a crime for how easily I'm getting away with not technically doing my job. (Though I am doing it in a very weird way because apparently progress is being made… (You know what this whole situation is just too confusing so I'm just going to be grateful that everything is working out)).

To be honest, I'm still a bit upset that there wasn't anything from the Joker waiting for me in my office. I know! I know! I'm so selfish, but I can't help it! I know that I was being too hopeful, but, I figured since we've been getting along so well lately, that maybe… I don't know. I guess that my hopes are way higher than I want them to be. I need to work on bringing my expectations down a couple of notches because I have a terrible habit of getting carried away. And plus, I don't need any gift or anything anyway. The Joker and I are good right now; and that's all that matters.

* * *

State Street is bustling. Guy, Sarah, and I decided to spend our evening in the shopping district. My wardrobe needed an update, and Sarah was more than willing to help; and of course, where Sarah goes, Guy goes too. We had hit six different stores already and we had fourteen different bags to carry. Since Guy made the unfortunate decision to join us on our shopping spree, we made him our mule and forced him to carry eight of the fourteen bags. They weren't particularly heavy so I didn't really feel too sorry for him.

"Alright, I think we should give Guy a break." Sarah said, feeling sympathetic for her boyfriend. "Don't you think Harleen?"

"Sure, if you'd like." As we walk down the side walk, I stop and set my bags down on the next available bench that we approach. Sarah gently sets her bags aside and joins me, while Guy roughly drops his bags down and plops himself heavily next to Sarah. I can't help but lean over Sarah to regard him smugly.

"Aw, what's the matter tough guy? A couple of bags weighing you down?" I smile teasingly, propping my head on my fist.

Guy shoots me a look. "I'm only having a hard time because I haven't eaten yet, okay?"

My smile widens. " _Suuuuuuurrree_ , that's why."

Between Guy and I, Sarah smiles amusedly at our banter. She reaches over to stroke the back of Guy's neck affectionately. "We probably should stop and eat something already. It's getting late."

Guy places his hand on Sarah's knee and squeezes lightly. "Always looking out, huh?"

"Of course." Sarah beams and moves to plant a soft kiss on his lips. I roll my eyes and look anywhere but at them. Sometimes I find their affection for each other to be adorable, but other times -like now- it annoys me.

I watch a listless amount of people pass us by and step into several different shops across the street. There's something therapeutic about watching people bustle to and fro. For a moment, I get lost in the sight of the differentiated people, when a small neon sign steals my attention. It's hung on a small building sandwiched in between two much taller buildings and reads in bright blue letters, _Al's Joke Shop_. The windows display a whole bunch of colorful little knick knacks that I can't identify from this distance. The little shop is so subtly peculiar that I find it immediately intriguing. I've never seen a gag shop before. I wonder if Mr. J would appreciate a place like this.

"-Harleen?" Guy pulls me out of my train of thought.

"Yeah?"

Guy furrows his eyebrows in concern. "You alright? You left me talking to myself for a while there."

"Yeah, I'm fine. Sorry. What were you saying?"

"Sarah and I want to grab a bite to eat at the Olive Garden we parked next to. Are you okay with going there for dinner?"

"Yeah, sure." I pause and look back at the little shop across the street, debating whether or not I should even bother. "You know what, can you guys wait here for me for a second? I just want to grab one last thing across the street before we go."

Sarah waves me away encouragingly. "Of course; we'll wait here."

"You okay with watching the bags?" I ask, already on my feet.

"Yup," says Guy assuredly, but I'm already walking away from them and crossing the street.

Standing before the building, I peer through the glass and past the knick knacks to survey the inside. The lights are on but no one is inside. The sign hanging on the door says they're open, so I tentatively climb the three steps leading up to the door and give it a little nudge open to poke my head inside to really check the place out. It's exactly what I'd imagine a gag store to look like, only a bit more colorful. The entire place is decorated with different gadgets and gizmos; I can't tell what half of the stuff is from where I'm standing. So, I decide the place is good enough for me to fully step into. I open the door briskly and a bell chimes announcing my arrival. To my surprise, no one rushes over to attend the register, …or me. I'm the only one in the shop.

I feel like I should just leave and try coming back another day when someone is here, but… I'm already here so I might as well have a look around. Plus, if customers _really_ weren't allowed in, they would have locked the door.

The shop is as small on the inside as it is on the outside. There's only three aisles but they are packed to the brim with different merchandise. Against the farthest wall, I see wigs and masks galore. The left side of the center aisle is full of board games; they have the usual games like monopoly and twister, but there are a whole lot of games that I have never even heard of. This first aisle has a lot of interesting things in it, like bacon strip bandages, 1st anniversary toilet paper, plastic poop and vomit, joke boxes, shock toys, bald brushes, a large assortment of funny mugs, pet sweeps, squirt cameras, etc. There's a _whole bunch_ of cool weird stuff here. I spot some cute closed umbrellas in the corner that have beautiful patterns decorated on them, but upon closer inspection, I can see that they have holes poked into them. That would actually make a pretty cute prank, I should buy one for Guy.

Across from the wigs and masks they have an assortment of different T-shirts and shoes. They have sweeper shoes! I wonder if they really work…

EW! They have a pair of shoes made out of pads! Are they real pads? I grab one and give it a gentle squeeze. Nope, not real pads. They're actual slippers with a pad design printed on them. You know, maybe now that I know that they're not real, I'm starting to think they're cute; They have a cute little ribbon on them. But I won't go so far as to buy them.

They have some pretty funny T-shirts. I'm definitely going to come back when Guy's birthday is around the corner. They have a lot of chemistry joke shirts and even some pervy joke shirts. Each shirt is funnier than the last, but this one is by far my favorite, _sex instructor: first lesson free_. I love it! But of course, if I were to get it, I would never wear it outside of the house.

I walk over to the counter to see the smaller knick knacks presented behind the glass. They have a lot of costume makeup here and most of this stuff is top notch; There's a lot of Ben Nye and Paradise products. There's also whoopee cushions, playing cards, funny fake ID's, different candies, fake sticks of gum, different key chains, different pins, weird pens, fake cigarettes, chattering teeth… WAIT! One of those chattering teeth is silver plated! It reminds me so much of the Joker's smile, I have to get it! It also has this adorable large bronze wind up on the back of it that gives it a hint of a vintage style. It's so cute and perfect; how could I not get this?

I look over the counter again and see a bell to ring for customer service. I was just about to tap it when I remember that this _is_ a gag shop. What if it's a buzzer toy or something? It probably isn't, but it doesn't hurt to play it safe. I grab one of the wooden bald brushes from the first aisle and use it to give the bell a tap. It chimes sharply and I wait a minute to listen for any bustling sounds coming from the backroom behind the counter. After a while I don't hear anything, so I tap the bell with the brush six times and yell, "Hello? Is anyone here?" If no one is really here, then I'm not above just hopping over this counter and taking the teeth without paying. I want them that badly.

A moment before I decide to just grab the teeth and go, I hear a toilet flush in the backroom. It takes a minute or two for the man to step through the back entrance and appear behind the counter. He's pretty young. He looks like he's in his early thirties. He's a brunette with a purposefully short trimmed curl-tipped mustache. Surprisingly, he pulls the look off. His hands fumble underneath his red flannel shirt to adjust his belt. He's too focused on fixing it that he speaks to me without breaking his concentration on the task at hand.

"Sorry about that. I fell asleep on the john. How can I help-" He finally looks at me and then immediately stops messing with his belt. "Wow…" He says under his breath and adjusts his shirt hurriedly while straightening himself out. "I'm so sorry. I was… busy… in the back-"

"Using the john?" I cut him off and smile teasingly. "You really shouldn't announce that kind of stuff to just anyone you know."

He blushes lightly and cringes a bit. "I am _so_ sorry. I had no idea that…" He clears his throat. "You know what, let's just forget about that, I won't do it again." He waves away the thought. "Now, how can I help you?"

" _O_ kay… I want to see those silver platted teeth behind the counter please."

"Of course. You've got a good eye. These are the best chattering teeth we carry." He reaches beneath the counter and pulls the teeth out.

"I believe it. It's adorable." I take the teeth from him and give them a closer inspection. They remind me so much of the Joker's smile; I love it. I give it a little wind up and watch it chatter away in the palm of my hand. I wasn't planning on it, but you know what, I want to give this to him as a gift. I think he'll love it as much as I do. Plus, it's only fair that _I_ get him something this time. And my gift is so much better than his; his died after all.

"Alright, I'm sold. I'll take 'em."

"Cool. Let me ring it up for you." I hand over the teeth and look around to see if I see anything else that I want. …My mind drifts back to the T-shirt.

"Wait, I want to get something else too." I rush over to grab the sex instructor T-shirt in my size and bring it back to the cashier. I can't help it. I like the shirt. I'll just wear it on rare occasions.

When I hand it back to him, he raises his eyebrows at me. I shrug my shoulders. "It was the funniest shirt. I can't help it."

He lifts his hands up defensively. "I didn't say anything."

I watch him bag my stuff up and then give him the amount of money he asks for.

"So," I say before he hands me my bag. "Are you Al?"

He laughs and shakes his head. "No, there is no Al."

"What? Then why call it Al's Joke Shop?"

He shrugs. "Al's Joke Shop sounds better than Sammy's Joke Shop."

…I don't really hear the preference. They both sound pretty equal to me. If I had a shop, I'd rather have it named after me than some other random name. "I take it you're Sammy?"

"Yup." He hands me my bag. "And you are?"

His fingers lingered for a moment. "My name's Harleen."

"Harleen? What a beautiful name. I've never heard it before, what is it?"

"I have no clue. I can never answer that question. It's probably just something that my mom made up."

"Oh that sucks. But you know what, I think the same way about my name. I mean come on, _Sammy_? Where does that come from?"

I can't help but laugh. Since I started talking to the Joker, I've developed a new appreciation for jokes and comedy in general. Laughing has been coming way easier to me lately.

"Yeah, Sammy is _way_ more unique than Harleen."

"Y _eah_ , it is." He says a bit awkwardly, not really sure how to continue speaking to me. I decide to start ending this conversion before this silent pause gets too weird.

"Well, thanks Sammy. Your shop is really cool."

"Thanks, your business is welcome here anytime. I'm always here… just so you know."

I smile kindly at his awkwardness. "Good to know." I start walking towards the door and wave back to him before I leave. "I'll see you around Sammy."

* * *

I'm kind of nervous to give the Joker my gift. What if he doesn't like it? I think it's adorable but what if he finds it offensive? Maybe he doesn't want to be reminded of the fact that he doesn't have real teeth anymore. I should have thought this through before I bought it. But I guess if he doesn't want it, I can always keep it. It reminds me so much of him.

I grab the teeth from my desk drawer and hide it in one of my inner pockets of my lab coat. We aren't exactly allowed to give anything to our patients around here; but it's not like they really check us to see if we're packing anything anyway.

I start heading down to maximum security, and the closer I get to my destination, the more nervous I get. I might just chicken out and not even mention that I got him something. This is a bit out of the blue after all. This is probably going to be weird. But I'm going to do it anyway. I want to make him smile.

When I arrive outside of the therapy room, Jerry and Lyle greet me warmly, as usual.

"Hi Dr. Quinzel," says Lyle.

"Good morning Doctor Q," says Jerry. "How are you today?"

I smile at the two orderlies. "I'm doing good; thanks for asking. What about you guys? Any new bets going on?"

"Of course there is," Lyle answers immediately and unenthusiastically. "There always is with this guy around." He points to Jerry. "I think he has a problem."

Jerry laughs heartily. "If I've got a problem then you do too Bolton. You're always bettin' against me."

"He's got a point Lyle." I intercede. I like getting in between their back and forth, and to be honest, it's a good distraction right now. They've calmed my nerves enough. "Alright boys, I've got my patient waiting for me over there, so I won't keep him waiting."

"Go on," says Jerry. "Go do your job and we'll do ours."

I smile and push past them. "Thanks guys." When I open the door, the Joker is busy picking his nails, but he stops immediately when his eyes meet mine.

"Har _leen_. It's _good_ to see ya kiddo."

"Good afternoon Mr. J," I greet him with my best smile and take my seat opposite him. "How are you today?"

"Oh, you know," he waves his hand vaguely in the air. "The usual case of dementia and bipolar disorder are giving me my usual daily challenges but other than that…"

I give him my 'are you serious look.' "Will you stop mocking your default diagnosis? I should have never told you…"

The Joker grins and rests his chin on his propped, folded hands. "You know doc, you've never told me what _your_ diagnosis of me is."

I give him my secret smile and busy myself with opening up my notebook and uncapping my pen. The man is an utter enigma to me. I don't want him to know that I can't figure him out. Even though I'm pretty sure he already knows that…

The Joker drops his hands on the table and pouts. "Won't you tell me doc?"

I roll my eyes playfully. "Of course not."

He pulls his lip back into a frown and furrows his eyebrows. "Why not?"

"Because." I say petulantly.

"Bec _ause_ …" He drawls, rolling his hand impatiently in the air, gesturing for me to continue.

"Just because." I say dismissively.

The Joker grunts grumpily, leans back in his chair and crosses his arms. "You're going to have to do better than that _Har_ leen." He says a bit too darkly. He doesn't like it when I keep information from him.

I've got to think of a way to dodge this. If I ignore it, he'll get even angrier. If I change the subject, he'll just reel the conversation back. He's way too smart to be tricked into forgetting this, so maybe I can bargain with him…

I smile cheekily. "I'll tell you what Mr. J. If you drop this, I'll reward you with something n _ice_." I sing the last word. I'm a bit nervous about this, but somehow, sitting here with him now; I know he'll love it.

He perks up immediately but there is definite caution in his eyes. He uncrosses his arms and sits up straight. "Reward me?" He says gruffly. "With what?"

"Ah, but that would ruin the element of surprise wouldn't it?"

"Hmm…" He strokes his chin pensively, but I can't tell if he's really thinking about this or just being theatrical, as always. "I can't say I'm not intrigued…"

"Well then," I lean over the table and prop my elbows on the hard steel surface, entwining my fingers together and resting my chin over them; a Cheshire grin tugs my lips into place. "Why not live a little on the wild side and just gamble with this one Mr. J? What's the worst that could happen?"

The Joker smiles wickedly, loving my enticing side. " _Weeelllll_ , let me think… I could be missing out on some _juicy_ information…"

"Juicy?" I snort. "Trust me when I say that you're not missing out on much in that department." He seriously isn't. I've got nothing.

" _Hmmm_ … Okay Ha _rleen_. I'll play your game."

My eyebrows shoot up in surprise. "Really? You won't ask me about your diagnosis anymore?"

The Joker breathes heavily. "I guess not," he says gravelly.

"Perfect." I chime. "Then I guess you've earned this." I fish out his gift from my inner pocket but before I pull it out into view, my eyes dart to the door to make sure that the orderlies aren't peering into the room. They aren't of course; they trust me too much. With the coast clear, I place the gift in the center of the table. A brown little box with a blue bow sits before the Joker, awaiting judgment. I nervously tuck away a strand of loose hair behind my ear. "I uh- hope you like it. I picked it out myself…"

The Joker looks at the gift, then back at me, and then his eyes drift back to the gift. It's as if he's thinking, 'is this for real?' I can tell I guessed his thoughts exactly when he shrugs absentmindedly and reaches for the little box.

Once it's in his hands, he brings it up to his ear and shakes it; trying to guess what's inside before opening it. He then scrutinizes the box and rubs the bow between his two fingers, feeling the material. After that, he brings the box up to his nose to give it a little whiff.

Jeez, will he just open it already? What the hell does he think I put in there? It's not like I'm trying to trick him or anything; nothing dangerous is going to come popping out when it's opened.

The Joker places the box back down on the table and slowly tugs at one end of the bow, undoing the knot completely. He then removes the lid of the box and tilts the open box towards him so that he can see what's inside. I guess this angle didn't give him a good enough view to identify the object inside because his eyebrows furrowed a bit in confusion and he ended up sticking his hand in to pull the teeth out.

When the chattering teeth were finally resting in his palm, he took one good look at them and then he burst out laughing.

"AAAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Uh… I can't tell if this means he likes it or not… Is he laughing because he thinks it's ridiculous or does he love it? My chest is squeezing with nerves.

The Joker pounds the table in his fit of hysteria and attempts to calm himself down. He takes a couple of deep, unsteady breaths before speaking again. "Ooh Dr. Quinzel… you've got yourself a _great_ sense of humor!"

My whole body jolts at the appraisal and I beam. "You like it? They look just like yours don't they?"

He holds the teeth up in his palm to bring it into full view. "Ahaha! These things are hysterical!" He twists the bronze metal piece in the back and then watches the silver plates jitter away. "I'm impressed kid. This thing isn't half bad."

I'm grinning from ear to ear. "I'm glad you like it Mr. J. Just don't let yourself get caught with it." My eyes dart back to the door to find the orderlies on the other side with their backs still turned away from us.

" _O_ h, _trust_ me," he says; his eyes slowly look away from the wound up teeth to meet my eyes directly. His lips twist into a slow, devilish smile. "I won't let _anyone_ take this from me."

* * *

 **AN: Wow... This is the longest I've gone without updating and I am SOOOO SORRY. School got tough and I decided to give it 100% of my attention. But, the semester is over and I'm going to be updating MUCH MORE FREQUENTLY now. This chapter isn't too great because I'm a wee bit rusty, but I promise that I'll get back into the groove of things. Thank you guys so much for waiting for this and reading it. Please let me know what you guys think, I miss hearing from you!**

 **Thanks again, and I'll see you all in the next chapter. ;)**


	12. Two Special Girls

**Chapter Twelve:**

 **Two Special Girls**

 _Hey, are you up yet? You have a bad habit of sleeping in when you're not supposed to._

My mind awakens before my body does. My eyes blink open to look at the bare white ceiling.

 _~Good morning beautiful._

 _Ah, there's my sleeping beauty. It's about time too; you're going to be late._

Huh? I turn my head ninety degrees to look at my clock. It reads 7:50 a.m.

~ _Shit!_

 _Heeheehee!_

I burst out of bed in an instant and start kicking off my pajama pants. Where the hell did I leave my work pants? I can see a black material peeking out from beneath my bed. I pull it out and find that it is one of my work pants but it's the same pair that I wore yesterday. I bring it to my nose and give it a whiff. It smells descent enough; I guess it's still okay to wear again.

I tug my pants on and then comb through one of my drawers to pull out a clean, white button down. Once it's on, I make my way to the kitchen and pour myself a bowl of lucky charms. Cereal never gets old. I could eat the same bowl every morning of my life and I wouldn't complain not once.

As I'm eating, I hear some serious shuffling going on in the bedroom next to mine. I guess I'm not the only one who slept in this morning huh?

I reach the bottom of my bowl and my roomie still hasn't left that room. I guess I could go out and check the mailbox in the meantime. I ditch my empty bowl in the sink and open the front door to greet the morning. I love this time of year. Mid-July morning sunshine is the best. It warms your skin in an instant; I love the heat. I step outside and take a leisurely walk towards the mailbox.

Let's see what we have here… Phone bill, credit card application, and a flyer to the new pizza place around the corner. Nothing interesting here. I close the box and tuck the mail under my arm. In the middle of the lawn, the morning paper lies haphazardly thrown. I walk through the dewy grass to pick it up. I think I'll read this during my lunch break today.

"Oh, good morning dear!"

I turn to see Mrs. Hardler standing outside her home with her morning paper.

"Good morning Mrs. Hardler. How are you today?"

"I'm good honey. What about you? Still working hard?"

I smile. "Of course. But I'm still playing hard too."

She laughs heartily. Mrs. Hardler has a peculiarly young spirit for someone of her age. She's in her early 70's and if you met her, you would completely forget that fact.

"Well, that's good baby 'cuz let me tell you, working hard ain't worth it if we can't play hard too; and you deserve it."

"Thanks, you do too. Retirements been good huh?"

She smiles. "Mmhm, it's been great. Charles and I are going dancing tonight. You want to join us?" she points to my apartment. "You can bring your friend."

Hmmm dancing doesn't sound like a bad idea but…

 _Dancing? I guess I wouldn't mind but, maybe tonight isn't the best night._

 _~I think so too._

"Sorry. If it were any other night, I'd say yes."

"Well how about next week? Charles and I are always up for dancing."

"You and Charles put me to shame with how active you two are," I joke. "But next week is perfect."

Mrs. Hardler claps her hands together in jubilation. "Yay! I can't wait to see what moves you got."

I laugh. "Don't get too excited, I don't have much."

She waves away my warning. "Then I'm just going to have to teach you everything I know."

"I look forward to it."

She starts walking back to her house. "Alright then, I'll you around baby."

"See ya."

When I'm back inside I place the mail on the counter and when I turn around I'm greeted by a furious and flustered blonde.

"I _hate_ those new alarm clocks we got. They suck!" She says hurriedly rummaging impatiently through her purse. "I didn't even hear mine ring this morning."

"Come to think of it, I didn't hear mine either."

She pulls out the keys she was looking for and smiles briefly at them before tossing them to me. "Yeah, we need to get rid of them and get new ones tonight. But right now, we need to leave a.s.a.p. I can't be late for my session with my patient."

She worries too much about her patient sometimes. I know he's that Joker and that he's a seriously high profiled case, but being late for one single session isn't going to have terrible consequences or anything. I guess I understand the eagerness to study someone as medically fascinating as the Joker, but, I imagine those sessions being uncomfortable, regardless. So why rush over to something as unpleasant as that?

"You take your work too seriously. You know that don't you Harleen?" I say heading towards the door. She smacks my arm and pushes past me to get outside.

"Shut up. You don't take your work seriously enough. You're running late too you know."

I make a hurt face and purposefully start walking ten times slower towards the car. When she reaches the car, I can see the question on her face as to why I haven't reached the driver's side yet. She turns to me and rolls her eyes impatiently while trying to hide her amusement.

"Come on Guy! I don't want to be late."

I continue my slow pace before relenting. "Alright, alright let's go."

She sighs and smiles, "finally."

* * *

 _I don't want to be here; I want to go home!_

"I think that with patient 3870, you should double his meds," says Dr. Arkham in the middle of my review evaluation. "I think he'd progress more with his treatment if he had more help controlling the cerebral problems. So, let's focus on reducing that pain."

"Okay; that sound like a plan."

 _I love my job but this work load is killing me. Do they honestly expect me to do all this on my own?_

"Other than that Dr. Kopski, I'd say you're doing a fantastic job with these patients." He closes the beige file containing my progress reports for this month. "They're well on their way with this treatment."

"Thank you Dr. Arkham, I'll go fill out the forms for these meds right away." I get up and leave his office. Right now, I have seven different patients that I'm treating; which is a lot for any doctor at this facility. Around here each patient is their own handful. So, I have to meet with Dr. Arkham often to make sure that I'm on top of everything and not forgetting to give each patient the necessary attention and treatment that they require.

 _~Well, I don't know about you, but I am killing it at work._

 _That's great Guy. Work is killing_ _me_ _right now._

 _~You got this. You're a tough girl._

 _Damn right I am._

On my way back to my office I stop at the pharmacy office to take care of the new med situation. Once I finally reach my office and sit in my chair to relax, Harleen strolls in jollily and practically dances towards the seat opposite my desk.

"Hey Guy. Have you finished yet?"

"Yeah I'm just getting my stuff in order. You?"

Harleen smiles to herself as if she's enjoying her own private joke. "Yeah. I just finished my session."

"How is your patient? Word on the street is that he's improving."

Harleen rolls her eyes playfully. "Barely! Dr. Arkham is nuts. He shouldn't be going around telling everyone that he's improving when he really isn't."

I smile at her. I love that she's so honest with me. She would never speak this way about her progress or Dr. Arkham if I were anyone else. "What was the _supposed_ progress that he credited you with?"

Harleen rest her arms on the handles of the chair and leans back. "That he's eating more and hurting himself less."

"But that is real progress, isn't it?"

Harleen sighs and rests her head in her left palm. "I guess…" She's solemn for a moment but then she perks up immediately. "So, can we go now? I want to go out to eat tonight. What do you say?" Well how can I say no when she asks me that eagerly? Whenever she's excited or happy about something, her eyes get all big and her dimples appear. It'd break my heart to disappoint that face.

"Sure, whatever you want I guess."

She beams and claps her hands together once. "Cool! Let me just run to my office and grab my purse." She starts heading out of the room and says more to herself than to me. "I wish our offices were right next door to each other."

"Lord help me if that were true," I call after.

"Shut up," She calls back and leaves. I grin to myself. I love messing with her. Harleen is the little sister I always wanted. I'm an only child, so living with someone who's _my_ age and that I can play around with is really awesome. It's like I have a sibling of my own, and I'm enjoying every minute of it.

 _I'm so glad that you have Harleen too. I love that she can keep you company when I can't._

* * *

After dinner, Harleen and I went into a food coma on the living room couch. We went to an all you can eat buffet, and believe me; we ate _all_ we can eat. We just recently started watching _The Office,_ so we just decided to chill and watch a couple of episodes. We're on season three now. Out of nowhere, Harleen says, "wow it's been awhile, huh?"

I look at her questionably. "Awhile since what?"

"Since we've hung out; just the two of us."

I look at her like she's gone crazy. What is she talking about? We hang out together _all_ the time. …Don't we?

Wait.

Now that I think about it… I guess we _haven't_ been doing much chilling together; besides going and coming from work. Wow, I had no idea. Since Sarah's been in my life, I guess I've been dedicating all of my free time to her. I can't help it. She's my soulmate. My entire world revolves around her. She's all I think about. It's incredible how the moment I met her, everything about who I was completely changed. Suddenly I wasn't just some dorky guy, I became a man with a real purpose in life. To keep my girl happy and safe. That's all I want. As long as I do that, I can say that my life has been well spent.

But I guess my change of mind set hasn't been too kind to Harleen. I feel bad. Before Sarah, we were all we had. All of our friends moved away after college, and neither of us has family in Gotham, so we only had each other as company. Harleen is more than my best friend; she's become family. So, I can't believe that I haven't made the time to hang out with her alone.

 _Aw… Guy you better apologize and start spending more time with her! I don't want to come in between you two._

"I guess it has been awhile… I'm sorry."

Harleen looks at me with great concern. "No. Don't say that. I get it you know. You found your _soulmate_. Of course things are going to change after that; I'm not complaining Guy. I'm really happy for you and I don't want you to change a thing, okay? I'm more than fine."

I smile warmly at her and squeeze her hand gently. She is such an amazing person; I couldn't have asked for a better person to be my best friend. "You're the _best_ , you know that?"

She smiles triumphantly. "I know."

"And I know you'll find your soulmate soon too." Harleen looks at me cautiously. "I really hope that you do because that way, I'll feel less guilty," I joke and she only smiles sheepishly at me.

"Thanks Guy."

We stay in a comfortable silence after that and go back to watching TV. It's really hard for us to ever be uncomfortable around each other. As a matter of fact, I can't think of a single time when we have ever had an awkward, uncomfortable moment. I guess we're just cool like that.

 _Yes! I finally finished everything I needed to do!_

I automatically smile. I want to see her so bad. We haven't met up today at all.

~ _Awesome! I'll go pick you up._

 _Yay! Thank you! I can't wait to see you._

Oh wait…. I look to Harleen who's really enjoying the show. I can't leave after everything we've just talked about.

 _You don't have to Guy. I can easily come to you._

I don't want Sarah riding the bus though… Shit, what do I do? Harleen starts laughing at something that happened in the show and when I don't laugh with her, she looks at me and notices my conflicted brewing.

"What's up Guy?"

"Nothing," I assure her.

"No, no, no. You don't make that face because of ' _nothing_ ,'" she mimics my voice terribly.

I sigh. "Sarah's done with work."

Harleen rolls her eyes playfully and shakes her head at me like I missed something obvious. "Well what are you still doing here stupid? Go get her."

"Yeah?"

"Yes, dummy. Go, I told you I'm fine."

She really does seem fine and unbothered but I still can't shake this guilty feeling. "Alright, I'll hurry back okay?"

She waves me away. "Don't worry about it. Take your time."

"You really are the best." I grin and she smiles back at me before I leave. I'm really grateful to have her in my life, but I'm also incredibly grateful to have Sarah with me now too. She's everything I never thought I'd have. The whole soulmate concept has always puzzled me growing up and to be honest, I really didn't have much faith in the fact that I would someday meet mine. I'm over the moon happy that I was wrong and that I met Sarah. I can't even begin to describe how meeting your soulmate just changes you completely. All of these strange, incredible feelings just take over and I don't mind them at all. I _love_ all of these unfamiliar emotions that Sarah's introduced me to. I wouldn't change a damn thing about us or our history together. If I had too, though, I would make it so that we'd meet sooner; because everything about her makes me eager and impatient to be with her. Like I am right now.

 _~Hold on baby. I'm coming to get you._

* * *

 **AN: Okay, that was a total filler. But a somewhat important one. I wanted to do a small take of Guy's point of view so that you guys could see how a typically relationship in this universe is supposed to function and how out of sync the Joker and Harleen are. I didn't get too much into the exact feelings and stuff of Guy and Sarah because I want to save all of that gushy stuff for Harleen when her time comes.**

 **And by the way guys, I posted chapter eleven last week, but an error occurred while I was posting it. So, the chapter technically did post but no one was notified of it. ...Or at least I think so because in the description of the story, it said that I hadn't updated since February even though I had just updated earlier that day...**

 **Oh well, I guess for people who didn't notice the last update, these two chapters will be a pleasant surprise.**

 **Thank you all for reading the story this far. I'll see ya in the next chapter!**


	13. Stupid Decisions

**Chapter 13:**

 **Stupid Decisions**

I've done something horrible, and Guy is not happy with me because of it.

Guy walks into the kitchen and shakes his head disappointedly at me the moment he sees me.

I scoff out of irritation. I've had enough. "Will you stop it already? It's bad enough that I already feel guilty enough as it is."

Guy continues shaking his head obnoxiously as he looks into the fridge to grab the gallon of milk and pour himself a cup. "Nope."

"Ugh, Guy!" I whine.

Guy leans against the counter opposite me and takes a long sip of his glass of milk. He makes his oh-so-familiar ' _ah_ ' sound when he's finished and regards me with his very rare but serious face. "Harleen. I'll only stop when _you_ stop."

I roll my eyes at him. "I can't do that."

"Why not?" He asks sounding too much like a doctor which is pissing me off just a bit.

"Because I can't abandon him. I worked so _hard_ to get him and I'm not going to get rid of him just because _you_ asked me to. He's _mine_ and I won't let anyone get in between us."

Guy sighs exasperatedly and strokes his chin pensively for a brief moment. "This isn't healthy Harleen and you know it. This'll be the death of you."

"No, it won't!" I shake my head too frantically. "I swear! I know what I'm doing Guy, trust me. Please." I clap my hands together as if in prayer and give him my best puppy dog eyes. A very affective expression that I possess; or so I've been told.

"No." Guy warns and wags his finger at me. "Don't look at me like that; it's not going to work. This isn't right Harleen and I'm not going to let you get away with this. I'm putting my foot down. You can't keep him becau-" Guy shakes his head swiftly as though he's trying to shake off a bad thought. "Ugh! IT. You can't keep _it_.

I gasp in horror. "Don't call him _'it.'_ He can hear you!"

Guy rolls his eyes at me. "It's a damn coffee machine for cripes sake!"

" _Expresso machine_ ," I correct and look at the impressive and mighty caffeine dispenser that I purchased just a day ago. I knew I shouldn't have gotten it. I knew that having it was bad but I just couldn't help it. When I saw it was on sale, I had to get it. When I brought it home, Guy was not happy about it at all. Of all people, he knows best just how much I _love_ caffeine and how _big_ of a problem I have with consuming it. I guess you could say that I have somewhat of an addiction to it, but I'm not sure that I'd even go so far as to put it like that. Guy certainly would though. He thinks I'm an addict and I'm in denial. _Puh_ -lease. I have my daily caffeine consumption under control; it's not like I have six cups a day. Why I've even recently limited myself to having one cup a day. Could an _addict_ display such amazing self-control like that, huh? I don't think so. Therefore, I am no addict.

As for naming the machine… I'm willing to admit that it does seem fucked up that I'm addressing it as a person. It makes me look bad and doesn't help my case at all; I get that. But, I spent _so much_ money on it that it breaks my heart to think that I spent so much on one _thing_. So in a twisted way, I'd rather justify my purchase by associating it as a person rather than an object. It makes me feel just a wee bit better.

Guy moves around me to place his cup in the sink. All the while shaking his head at me in that disappointed manner. I shoot him a look as he passes me.

"You've got to get rid of it Harleen. It's for your own good."

"I can't. I can't get rid of him."

"Yes you can," Guy says exasperatedly. "I'll help you."

"No, because the only way that I'll get rid of it, is if I get my money back. And guess what, I can't return it. All sales are final."

Guy narrows his eyes at me suspiciously. "Well you just thought of everything didn't you?"

"I'm not lying, I swear!" I dash quickly to my room to retrieve the box that it came in. There's a huge orange sticker on it that clearly says, _All Sales Final._ I show it to Guy and practically shove it in his face. "See?"

Guy scowls at the sticker petulantly. "Hmm… I guess this checks out…"

I smile triumphantly and put the box down next to our recycling bin.

"Don't give me that smug look. This doesn't mean that you can't get rid of it."

"Well I'm not throwing it out," I retort. "I spent too much money on it… him." I correct myself.

"You could give it away as a gift to someone you love."

I smile cheekily. "Okay! Do you want it?"

Guy gives me a look. "Try again."

I cross an arm and crook my other hand under my chin in thought. "Hmm… I could give it to Sarah." _Hee hee_ , if Sarah has it, then I could force her to bring a cup every time she comes over.

"No." Guy rejects immediately. "Sarah doesn't need that crap. Try again."

"Ugh, I don't have anyone else I can give it to. You and Sarah are all I got." Because I certainly can't give it to the Joker…

Guy smiled sympathetically and briefly at me before continuing. "Why don't you just sell it on Let-Go?"

"Because I don't want to _let-go,_ I love it. You're only complaining because you haven't had a cup yet. Want one?" I ask enthusiastically. I can see Guy getting ready to reject my offer but I cut him off before he gets to. "Come on! Let me show you what this bad boy can do. One cup will silence you forever, I promise."

Guy rolls his eyes and pushes past me, ignoring my offer. "You think good about what you're going to do with it Harleen. I'm giving you till the end of the week." Guy goes to his room and immediately walks back out carrying his briefcase. "Come on you coffee freak. Let's get out of here or we'll be late for work."

I scoff at him. "Jeez, who died and made you king?"

I grab my purse and follow him solemnly out the door.

* * *

I miss Joan.

She and I had been talking _a lot_ recently during our breaks; and now she's gone on maternity leave. It's not that I don't have anyone else to talk to, I mean Guy's here and all, but I just miss her company. Pregnancy has made her extremely pleasant to be around and I love having a female friend to talk to, it's so refreshing. It's true that I have Sarah, but we're never alone to have any kind of intimate conversation because Guy is always around when she is.

Plus, Joan used to keep my mind off of you-know-who. It's pretty unnerving knowing that he's under the same roof as me. I try not to think about it because it just infuriates me knowing that we're in the same building and I can't see him whenever I like. I get antsy just thinking about it…

I started aquaintancing myself with a bunch of different coworkers just to keep my mind off of him. There are some surprisingly cool people working here and unsurprisingly dull people too. There are at least four security guards, two orderlies, and three nurses that I would definitely hang out with outside of work if they asked me to. Of course I have no problem asking any of them to hang out, but after a long day of work, I just get so lazy, you know?

Sometimes I find myself thinking about what it would be like if the Joker asked me out. How would he ask? And what would we even do? I can't help but blush every time I start thinking about the possibilities that that last question entails.

That's why I need to get him out of here ASAP. The _what ifs_ are killing me! I grow more impatient each day. I just want a taste of what it would be like to finally be with my soulmate the way that God intended. We're meant to be together, so it fucking sucks that we're not.

I've been trying to subtly convert his violent and twisted perspectives but with no luck. He just won't bite. The man is as stubborn as a mule when it comes to what he believes is _right_ or _wrong._ Sometimes I think that he's that way on purpose because he doesn't want to get out of this place. It even feels like he likes it here. What's to like? I work here so I know it sucks. The food is terrible, the beds are uncomfortable, and dare I mention the obvious lack of freedom? Why on Earth is he so intent on staying in this crappy facility. If I were him, I would totally cooperate with my doctors so that I can be declared sane pronto and get the fuck out of here. But the Joker just can't be that simple can he? He has to make everything so difficult. Studying him has been -without a doubt- a real challenge.

However it's true that although he hasn't budged in terms of making any therapeutic progress, he has improved with his behavior. At least towards me. We've been getting along _so_ well lately, that we might have even started flirting with each other; once or twice; just a bit. I never let it go far at all because I don't want to start something with the way we are now, i.e. doctor/patient. So I keep him at arm's length as best I can. But like I said earlier, I get more impatient each day, and sooner or later, I fear that I'm going to do something stupid. My self-control can stay strong for only so long. But I guess I'll just have to do my best to keep it up; as long as it takes.

Right now, I'm gearing up for another session with Mr. J. I've got his file, my notes, a pen, and I'm ready to go. I whistle my way down to maximum security. I've recently had a Star Wars movie marathon with Guy and Sarah so the theme song is stuck in my head. I've got my hair tied up in my signature ponytail today and it swishes from left to right with every step I take. I've also decided to wear my new red stilettoes that I got the day I got my expresso machine. They match my blouse; I love them. I've even gotten used to putting on a bit of make-up daily. Gosh, the extra efforts we women make for men…

When I reach the therapy room in maximum security's lower level, I'm disappointed to find that only Lyle is stationed outside of the room. I mean, I don't really have anything against Lyle, but Jerry is my favorite of the two.

"What's up Lyle? Where's Jerry today?" I ask.

Lyle smiles knowingly. "He called in sick today."

"Sick?" I huff and purse my lips. "More like hung over…"

Lyle laughs in spite of himself, "I can't confirm or deny that."

"Mmmhmm…" I smile knowingly at him. Leave it to Jerry to waste a sick day on a hangover. On those rare days where I do wake up hungover on a work day, I suck it and come into work anyway. I guess that makes me tougher than Jerry huh.

"Alright well, I trust you can get on without him, right?" I ask moving around him to open the door. …Jerry always opens the door for me…

"Yeah, yeah. Don't even worry about it," he assures me and waves me inside the therapy room.

As soon as my eyes meet the Joker's, I beam in a way that I could never do purposefully even if I tried. He smiles too but it isn't nearly as expressive or as love-struck as mine is.

"Good afternoon Mr. J. How are ya today?" I ask as I take my seat across from him.

He breathes noisily through his nose before speaking. "Just wonderful now that you're here my dear." He smiles cheekily.

I smile shyly by way of answering.

"And how are _you_ , doctor?" He asks very politely. He's even sitting like a proper gentleman with his hands folded over the table and his back perked straight, not leaning against the back of the chair at all. He reminds me of a good student eager to start class. Let's hope he acts like one today.

"I'm doing fine Mr. J. Thank you for asking." He nods once in contentment and assumes his usual position of leaning back as far as he can with his arms stretched over the table.

"So, this weekend I went online and watched Mayor James' speech when he was inaugurated, and you were right. He does have a weird fascination with animal shelters. I wonder what that's about."

The Joker shrugged. " _Hm_ , I used to think that he had something… _important_ , storaged up in one. But after tearing down every one in the city, I know _that_ wasn't it."

"That was you?" I remember hearing on the news that someone had ransacked all of the animal shelters in the city, I just didn't remember who it was that did it. Of course, now that I think about it, it makes perfect sense. NO criminal would bother messing with an animal shelter -let alone every animal shelter in the city- because there's no profit in it; no money, no valuables, nothing. The Joker isn't like other criminals. When he does something, it isn't necessarily to make a profit, or even for revenge. He just does things for the heck of it; to entertain himself. Or in this case, to sate a small curiosity.

To answer my question, the Joker bares his teeth in a huge toothy smile. His silver teeth glint under the florescent lighting. He's too adorable; it's totally disarming. I can't help the light blush that paints my cheeks or the sheepish smile that I return as a response. I mess with a strand of my hair from my ponytail as a distraction to gain composure again, but then I quickly realize that this makes me look even more bashful so I stop immediately.

"I, uh… I guess I should've figured that it was you to begin with huh. I mean, who else?" I say, getting back into the conversation. "So, how have you been feeling since you started taking your new medications?"

The Joker grimaces a bit. And makes a _so-so_ indication with his hand. "Ehhh…"

"What? Is it tiring you out too much or something?"

" _Welllll_ … I was hoping for somet _hinnngg_ … stronger," he confesses shamelessly. "If you want to dope me up, at least do it right."

I give him a look. "You know that's not what I'm trying to do."

The Joker strokes his chin pensively, pretending to think. "Do I? It's hard to say with all of these _drugs_ in me. Maybe I'm imagining it all. Who knows? Life is a blur…"

I roll my eyes but smile in spite of myself. "Ever the dramatic, huh Mr. J?"

He places his hand on his chest, aghast. "Who _meee_? How dare you Ha _rleen_." He teases. I secretly savor the way my name rolls off his tongue.

"I'm just going to assume then that you're good with your meds." I pencil down some quick notes for the progress report I'm going to have to fill out later.

"So…" The Joker begins before I can ask the rest of my weekly report questions. "Any chance I'll be getting out of here any time soon, _doc_?"

I suppress a tiny pang of irritation at the word _doc_. I guess it's not necessarily the word itself that bothers me but the way he says it. It almost sounds like an insult to me.

"What's the rush?" I ask casually. "Getting sick of me already?"

"Of _you_?" He rolls his eyes. "Never, Dr. Quinzel. I don't think I could ever get tired of _you_ , my dear." He grins in that charming, almost seductive way. This is one of my favorite smiles, for obvious reasons…

Too quickly however, his appearance changes into that of disgust when he looks around the room. "But, I am getting tired of being in this room. Wouldn't a change of… _scenery_ be ni _ce_ Harleen?" He slowly reaches to lightly grab the fingers of my right hand resting on the table. His thumb absent mindedly strokes my knuckles making my body shiver ever so slightly from the chilling tingles that his contact provokes in me. I know that anyone who has ever met the Joker would _completely_ disagree with what I'm about to say, but being touched by him is one of the most amazing feelings I have ever experienced. And honestly, that dark, perverse, side of me can't help but wonder what it would feel like to do _more_ than just hold hands. Holding hands is the most physical contact we ever offer; which is already more than we should be doing…

"Just think…" The Joker whispers enticingly. "You and me… a night in the town… just imagine all of the fun we would have. We could really paint the city _red_ doc."

I smile shyly. That does sound amazing but my hands are tied here. I can't release him even if I wanted to. He needs to show a lot more progress first. "As tempting as that sounds, I'll have to pass. For now. You can't be released yet."

The Joker immediately removes his hands from mine. "Why not?" He snaps at me.

My smile is whiped clean from my face. "Because you're not ready yet. But, maybe… in a month or two…"

" _Ugh_ … a month or two?" He whines and rolls his head around his shoulders.

"Yeah. You need to show more progress before I can even begin to start declaring you sane."

" _Saaannnnnne_." He stresses the word pensively. "Is that what you want Harleen? _Sanity_?" He looks at me seriously; his eyes burning into mine, waiting for an answer.

I return his expression with my own. "If that's what it takes to get you out of here, then that's what I want."

We stare at each other for a good minute until a slow and mischievous smile spreads across his face. "What if… that wasn't the only way to get me out of here?"

I arch a brow cautiously. "What do you mean?"

"What if…" His eyes stay on mine and he speaks carefully, paying close attention to my reaction to his words. "…you and me just… left?"

I stare at him in disbelief. "What?" Is all I can say.

He's amused by my dumbfounded expression. "Come on Ha _rleen_. You know you want to… It would be so _easy_ too." He reaches over the table to grab my hand and he strokes it ever so gently. I visibly shudder at the contact and he takes it as a sign of approval for him to continue. He traces two fingers back and forth over my wrist and looks listless as he speaks. "There are so many things I want to… _show_ you. Things that I can't show you in _here_." He looks up at me with a frustrated expression. "We can't do anything in here. Nothing _fun_ happens here. You want to have _fun_ … with me… don't you Ha _rleen_?" His hand glides up my arm and he strokes it cajolingly.

I'm a bit too distracted by his hand on me. I'm loving this physical contact. "I-I do want to have fun with you. I can only imagine what a night in the town would be like with you." He smiles exuberantly; my train of thought is going exactly where he wants it to go. "But…" His smile falters. "There's no way that we can both just… leave." His hand stops stroking me but he doesn't remove it.

The Joker rolls his eyes and groans in exasperation. "Well of course we could."

" _Okay_ … and what would we do? Where would we go? If we leave now we'll be on the run our entire lives."

The Joker cackles and slaps the table, startling me. "On the run? Why would we run?"

"Because everyone will be after you to throw you back in here and they'll want to toss _me_ in Blackgate for letting you out."

"Harleen." He grips my hand and forces me to make eye contact with him. "I wouldn't let anyone touch a single pretty little hair on your head. If anyone _tried_ …" He trails off and laughs to himself. "Well that would be fun wouldn't it?"

I stare at him incredulity. I cannot believe what I'm hearing. He's basically saying that he'll protect me right? That _he_ or anyone else won't hurt me… Is this for real? Could he just be using me to get out? This isn't the first time he suggests breaking out of the asylum; but it is the first time he suggests I go with him. Could he really mean it, or is this just a new manipulative tactic. A huge part of me wants to just give in and do whatever he wants but my other sensible side knows that that wouldn't be right. If he's going to get out of here, it's not going to be that way. We need to do this right.

"Mr. J, a-as fun as you make this all sound, you have to understand that I just-"

"Shh." He silences me and pulls my hand up to his lips. Without breaking eye contact with me, he gives my hand a soft chaste kiss. And just like that, all reason, logic, and sense of morality leave me and are replaced by the greatest determination to keep those lips on me. They're so soft and surprisingly gentle. I want to know what they'd feel like on my lips. I _have to_ know what they'd feel like on my lips. "Don't worry Harleen. You work too hard, you know that? Just let me take the wheel and I promise you won't regret it." His teeth glisten as he smiles at me. I find him so breathtakingly adorable right now, I can't refuse him anything. I nod weakly, consenting him to do whatever it is he wants to do.

His smile stretches further at my response. "Atta girl. I knew you'd choose the right answer."

"Mr. J… I-"

"HARLEEN!" Guy storms into the room looking frantic. I retract my hand from the Joker's immediately, hoping Guy didn't notice but he seems too disoriented to pay it no mind. Whatever he has to say is not good because it obviously couldn't wait until my session was over. My mind races with the possibilities and I'm suddenly scared shitless for whatever he's about to say.

"Shit Guy, what's going on?"

"It's our apartment. It's on fire!"

I stare at him wide eyed. "What?!"

"Our apartment is on fire! Mrs. Hardler called; come on we gotta go!"

"Okay, okay!" Completely forgetting about the Joker in our state of panic, Guy grabs my hand and we both bolt out of the room. Everything we own is in that apartment. We worked our asses off to get everything that's in there and we're not about to lose it all to some fire. If we do, we're screwed; we still have so many loans to pay off. We'd never be able to replace everything. I know I'm leaving Mr. J hanging, but he'll be fine. Saving all of my crap is my first priority right now.

* * *

When we pull up to our place, we see a single firetruck sitting outside the apartment. Guy doesn't even completely park the car; He practically jumps out of the car once he reaches the curb and storms over to the nearest firefighter. I follow Guy as best I can but as I look up at the building I notice that there oddly isn't any dark smoke anywhere to be seen.

"Excuse me," Guy stops a firefighter stepping out of the apartment. "We live here. Can you tell us what's going on? We got a call saying the place caught fire."

"Yeah it did, but don't worry it was nothing major."

Guy and I both release a sigh of relief. "Oh thank God!" He exhales.

"But wait," I interject. "There _is_ damage though? How bad is it?"

"It's not terrible," the firefighter answers, removing his gloves and moving us to the side to allow the other firefighters easy passage into the building. "It was a minor fire. We got here just in time before it could get any worse."

A second firefighter approaches us looking somewhat pleased with himself. "Hey boss, we've determined the cause of the fire."

"Oh good," says the first officer. "These people live here. They wanna know what's up. Was it what we thought it was?"

"Yup." The second fighter then addressed Guy and I. "That expresso machine you guys got short circuited and caused the fire to start in your kitchen."

Oh. Shit.

Guy crosses his arms and turns slowly to face me. The way he's looking at me reminds me of how people from _The Office_ stare into the camera. I give him my guiltiest smile and shrug my shoulders. "Gee, I guess I wasn't meant to keep that expresso machine huh?" Guy says nothing, but his brows deepen into an irritated expression.

"Yeah, I've heard about those damned coffee machines," a third firefighter adds walking back to their truck. "They recently had a recall for 'em because they keep doing this shit." He points towards the apartment referring to the fire.

"You don't say…" Guy says without breaking eye contact with me. Shit… I feel really bad right now…

"Well we'll leave you folks to it then. We took care of everything but I imagine you guys are going to want to get that outlet checked out, that wall repainted, and scrub out all of that dark ash. You're also going to want to sweep up a bit."

"Thank you guys," I say. "We really appreciate this."

"No problem, that's our job." Says the original firefighter before walking back to their truck with the others in tow. I wave them off as they drive away and Guy sneaks into the place behind me to check out the damage. I turn around and drag my feet up the steps leading into the house because I'm kind of dreading going in there.

When I walk inside, I immediately see my charred expresso machine in the kitchen. The small area around it is blackened as well; The wall, the counter and a bit of the floor. All in all though, this is not as bad as I had imagined it would be. This isn't even close, so I'm sort of happy with what I see. Guy on other hand…

He's standing before my machine, examining it. He looks disappointed. I approach him slowly. "I am _so_ sorry Guy. I had no idea this would happen. I should have listened to you when you told me to get rid of it. If I did none of this would have happened. But how was I to know that the circuit would fry? This was an honest accident, so, you'll forgive me eventually right?"

Guy sighs defeatedly. "Of course I forgive you Harleen. This _was_ an accident. I'm just reeling back from the fact that this damage is way better than what I was picturing in my head."

I laugh nervously. "Honestly, I was thinking the same thing."

We're quiet for a moment; both staring at the damned expresso machine that I now regret like hell for ever getting. "Don't worry about the mess Guy. I'll take care of this."

"No, it's cool. I'll help you. You're right. This wasn't really your fault anyway."

"No it is. This is my divine punishment for getting something that I never should have gotten in the first place."

Guy smirks at me amused by my way of thinking. For some reason, I've noticed that whenever I talk about karma or destiny or anything along those lines, he always wears that same secret smile. I'll have to ask him about it someday.

"Man, I'm just glad that my room was untouched. I've got some of Sarah's stuff in there."

"Yeah, those firefighters work fast, huh." I remove my coat and hang it on the hanger by the front door. "Well, why put this off any longer? I'm going to start cleaning all of this up. You could head back to work if you'd like. Don't you have another patient that you have to see later?"

Guy checks his wrist watch. "Yeah I do, but-"

"But nothing. Go." I shoo him towards the door. "I got this."

"Harleen, are you sure? I can stay. Really. Let me help you out."

I grab the broom and dustpan from beside the fridge. "No it's fine. This mess isn't even all that bad. You can help me repaint this wall this weekend because there is no way those stains are coming out."

"Alright I guess…" Guy says reluctantly. "We'll go to Home Depot or something tomorrow and get some paint."

"Sounds like a plan." I smile assuredly at him.

Guy takes slow steps towards the door, clearly not comfortable with just leaving. "Alright then… I guess I'll go… I'll let everybody know that we're okay here."

"Thanks Guy. And also… thanks for not being mad at me."

He smiles kindly at me before opening the door. "Of course, I don't think I could stay mad at you even if I wanted to."

"Lucky me." I sing and Guy laughs before leaving and closing the door behind him. Guy is just amazing and that's all there is to it. I am so lucky to have him as my closest friend.

I sigh resignedly before turning back to the mess before me. I push the dustpan to the side and start sweeping what I can. I'm going to have to mop this area too.

 ** _Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave._**

Huh?

 ** _Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave. Leave._**

Mr. J? I haven't heard him in the longest time. Leave? Is he thinking about leaving Arkham?! Shit, I hope not. I know that's the last thing we were talking about; could that conversation still be on his mind? I haven't had time to think about it yet. And actually, now that I _am_ thinking about it… I'm glad we were interrupted. I was so close to doing something really _stupid_. I can't let that happen again.

And… I'm remembering now that he kissed me… He actually kissed me… Not on the lips, unfortunately. But it was still a kiss. And it was awesome. I can't help but imagine what those lips would feel like against my own…

Ugh! I shake my head rapidly trying to get rid of those thoughts. I can't be thinking like that now. It's clearly a dangerous line of thought because the impulse to get a real kiss from him almost caused me to set him free. He's not ready for that yet. I still have to fix him.

But crap, what about what he said? Leave? Could he be thinking about escaping… without me? Ugh shit Harleen! You keep thinking in circles!

Or… what if he's thinking about how I just left him? I know he _hates_ being ignored and I just left him high and dry…

Oh shit I wonder if he's mad at me… Oh damn I'm really nervous now. I wish I could hear him better so that I can know exactly what he's thinking about. I hate these cryptic one word hints that I get; they don't do anything for me but keep me guessing.

Even if I went back to Arkham, I wouldn't be able to see him. Our slot time has long been over. I don't have authorization to pull him out of his cell whenever I like. I'm not even allowed to visit his cell… Ah man, I guess I'll just have to wait and see what tomorrow brings. It's all I can do right now.

* * *

 **AN: So... did I trick anyone at the beginning there? Even for a little bit?**

 **Again, sorry for the late update, I suck, I know. I took summer classes so they screwed me over with my free time... And I'm super anxious to keep writing because I love where this story is going to go. I fangirl myself just thinking about it.**

 **Thank you all for the wonderful reviews. You guys are amazing! Thanks for being soooooo incredibly patient with me. I know waiting for updates sucks. I'm trying you guys, I'm trying.**

 **I'll see you all in the next chapter!**


	14. Just Listen

**Chapter 14:**

 **Just Listen**

When I wake in the morning, I am super anxious to get to work. I shower then get dressed quickly and practically push Guy out the door. I know that getting there early isn't going to do me any good, considering that I still have to wait for our appointed therapy time. But sitting here at home feels worse. At least at Arkham, I can be comforted by the fact that we're both under the same roof.

When I reach my office, I have a seat at my desk and stare at the clock on the wall. I've got some time to kill but nothing to do. I tap my foot impatiently on the floor. I don't think I've ever felt this anxious to see him before. Something in me is screaming at me that I need to be with him right now. I'm not sure if it's because of what I heard him say yesterday or if somehow through our soulmate connection I can feel that he needs me. I'm not sure which one I'm hoping to be the truth because they both imply some sort of trouble. Either way, sitting here and thinking about it isn't making things any easier on my nerves. I need to pass the time somehow.

I reach into one of my desk drawers to pull out a small thin file that contains the progress report that I never finished completing. I didn't really get to ask all of the questions on here because I got distracted. I'll be sure to ask him the rest later today but honestly I already know what the answers are. I always fill out these progress reports with the same information because the Joker makes so very little progress. As a matter of fact, if I were really desperate to fill my time -which I am- I would go ahead and just fill this report out prematurely. I'm willing to bet that anything I write down now will be the same as what I would write if I waited until after the therapy session.

I guess I'll just fill this out then. I can think of this as a kind of guessing game.

* * *

Okay, so that killed an hour. I still have about an hour and a half left though.

What to do…

I would go bother Guy but he's in a session right now. If Joan was here, I would definitely stop by her office to have a chat. My only real option here is to leave my office and do something or talk to someone because there is nothing for me to do here but twiddle my thumbs.

With that, I push off against my desk and stand up lazily. I don't bother to close the door behind me when I leave; I left it ajar. Past experiences have taught me that even if I close the door and lock it, people tend to take it as an invitation to come in anyway and do what they like. So what's the point?

I maneuver my way through the many halls of the asylum and find myself in the break room. I figure there should be someone here that I can talk to. Unfortunately, there are only a couple of other people in the room and none of them are people who interest me.

I spot the coffee machine on the counter at the end of the room and my feet start moving toward it before my brain can catch up. I decide to just go with it anyway. I haven't had coffee this morning and it's not like I'll be able to have some later when I get home. One little cup right now wouldn't hurt. Plus, this pot is fresh and ready to go, how could I resist?

I add one shot of milk and three packets of sugar to my brew and take a small sip. _Hmm_ … Once you've had the best, nothing else tastes the same… I prefer my little expressos to this. Damn I'm going to miss that machine…

I lean against the counter and sip my coffee steadily. I really need something more to do. Maybe I should head over to the medical ward and see if they need any help or something. I imagine they're always really busy over there; what with half of the patients here who are constantly trying to hurt themselves, or others. I could chip in and help handle some patients I guess.

I'm about half way through my cup when a familiar face walks into the break room. Jerry strolls in looking refreshed and chipper. He goes straight for the coffee machine and greets me pleasantly. "Why good morning Dr. Quinzel. It's such a pleasant surprise to run into you outside of maximum."

I stare at him incredulously. " _Okaaayy_ … You aren't acting suspiciously cheerful at all. What's with you?"

Jerry actually sighs almost dreamily as he pours himself his cup of coffee. "Can't a guy just enjoy a beautiful morning and the company he keeps on said morning? And can said company not be snooty about it?"

I smile in astonishment at his unexpected good mood and raise both hands up in defense, even with coffee in hand. "Alright, sorry- Likewise, it is a pleasure to see you outside of maximum as well."

"Thank you," he says, pleased with himself as he rips open sugar packets and mixes them into his cup. I go back to drinking my coffee in silence. If he doesn't want to tell me what's up, I'm not going to push it. It's not unusual that Jerry is in a good mood. He's always in a sort of good/grumpy mood. It's just that now, he seems to be in a good/good mood, which is a little off. I guess it's a little hard to explain. You gotta know Jerry to know what I'm talking about.

Jerry finishes preparing his coffee and assumes a similar position near me; leaning his bum on the counter and drinking his coffee, while surveying the room. "So," he says casually after a sip. "You wanna know a secret?"

"Sure." I smile expectantly. "Oh! But if it's about you playing sick yesterday to not come into work, then I already know." I tease.

Jerry chortles. "Oh you do huh? Well then you know I wasn't _playing_ sick."

"Oh you're right. Of course you weren't. The poor baby had a little hang over."

Jerry gasps half surprised half laughing. "It was not _little_! That bitch was a monster! I was dying Harleen, I was seriously dying!"

I throw my head back and laugh heartily. Jerry jabs me playfully on my side with his elbow. "Oh you laugh now but you weren't there. You didn't feel my pain," he says.

"Alright, alright I'll take your word for it. But now you know not to have one too many again right?"

"Are you kiddin'?" He scoffs. "I'm ready for a repeat already."

I sigh. "If hang overs won't teach you your lesson, then I guess nothing will."

Jerry laughs into his coffee and I join him by taking a drink of my own. Then Jerry leans a little towards me. "I do have a secret though you know."

"Oh? You must really want to share it then huh?"

He sniggers. "Well, I _will_ tell you if ya really wanna know."

I purse my lips pretending to really think about it. "Fine, I'll bite. What's going on with you?"

"Okay," he says, looking like he's getting ready to tell a long story. "I met someone- but not just anyone. You follow?"

I furrow my eyebrows in confusion for a second but then realization hits me. "Oh, are you talking about your soulmate?"

"Yes!" He answers excitedly. "See, I told Bolton the same way I just told you and his dumbass didn't get it. Had to spell it out for him. You're a sharp one Quinzel.

I smirk at him. "Thanks, I try. So how'd you meet her?"

"At a fuckin' card game in my brother in law's basement. Can you believe that shit?"

"Damn. Why didn't you meet her sooner then if your brother in law knew her?" I ask.

"That's the same damn thing I said! I told Jacob -my sister's husband- I said, 'what the fuck man? You've been holding her out on me.'"

I laugh by way of response. I love that the more comfortable Jerry gets with someone, the more curse words come out of his mouth. I'm truly flattered that he's opening up to me more.

"Man…" He says in astonishment. "I can't believe this is happening to me… I'm fuckin' forty-three years old. I had given up a long time ago you know?"

That surprises me. "What? What do you mean you'd given up? How? I mean doesn't hearing her give you newfound hope that you'll meet? I mean, I've never met someone who's just given up."

Jerry shrugs. "Well, it's different when you hit forty and you still haven't met your other half. At twenty it's still exciting and shit; you know, the possibilities and stuff. But after waiting for forty something years, it gets tiring and it gets hard to just keep waiting you know?"

I think about that for a second. It's true that I didn't have to wait very long at all to meet my soulmate. And I was impatient as hell to meet him too. I can't imagine having to wait about fifteen more years to meet him. "I guess you're right…"

"Yeah, I'm just happy as hell that this is finally happening to me, you know?"

I smile proudly at Jerry and give his arm a gentle squeeze. "I bet. I'm happy for you."

"Thanks Harleen." We're quiet for a moment as we both go back to sipping our coffee. I finish off mine by tilting my head far back to let the last drop in the cup slide down to my lips.

"So," Jerry nudges me lightly with his elbow. "What about you huh? Have you met yours yet?"

I laugh awkwardly. "Uh… It's complicated."

"Complicated? Do tell."

I smash my cup in my hand and toss it in the trash next to me. "Well, I've never talked to anyone about this so if you keep your mouth shut, and I mean _really_ keep it shut, I'll tell you."

Jerry raises his free hand up in defense then uses it to mime himself zippering his mouth shut, locking the corner and then throwing away the key.

I sigh resignedly. "Okay. I have met him… but I can't be with him."

Jerry furrows his eyebrows in confusion. "What? Why the hell not?"

I cross my arms. "Because he's locked up."

He looks surprised. "No shit? Where? And what for?"

I scoff. "Shit, what isn't he in there for? He's at the Cook County Correctional Center in Chicago." I lie. As if I'd tell him the actual truth. But Jerry is just outside of my life enough to not have a very biased view on my situation. And to be honest, I could really use some advise. A lot of the orderlies here have ties with workers at Blackgate so I couldn't say that my soulmate was being held there; then he'd want to know who he is and I'm not going to cough up a fake name and make this more complicated than it has to be.

"Damn… That sucks. How long will he be in there for?" He asks.

I shrug. "Honestly, I'm not sure but it'll be a hell of a long time before he can be released. I'm talking years. Heck, I wouldn't be surprised if he gets life, but I hope to hell that that isn't the case."

"Shit, no kidding?"

"Nope. And I want to wait for him, I really do. I mean, what are my other options right? He's my _soulmate._ No one else can _ever_ top him. But… he's been scaring me lately…"

"Scaring you?" Jerry asks, concerned.

"Well, maybe 'scaring' is a pretty strong word, but I don't like the way he's been thinking lately. He wants to break out, and he wants me to help him."

"Help him? To break him out? How in the hell would you do that?"

I laugh nervously. "I have no fucking idea. He hasn't told me how yet because I haven't said yes. I mean, I can't do that. That goes against everything that I believe in. I like living my normal life and I like not breaking the law. I want a normal relationship like everyone else is lucky enough to have. I know I can get it if I just wait for him to be released properly but I feel like no matter what I say, he has no plans on waiting this out. He wants out of there _now_."

"No," Jerry says decisively. "Don't you dare lift a finger for his ass. He got himself into that mess, so it's not up to you to get him out of it. He's just being a baby. Tell his ass to suck it up and just serve his sentence like a man."

I cover my mouth with my hand in a sad attempt to suppress a giggle. I can just imagine me standing up to the Joker and calling him a baby and telling him to grow up. I wonder how he would take it.

I smile at the orderly. "You know what Jerry? That is some damn good advise. You're right. He _is_ just being a baby. If he's as tough as he thinks he is, he can suck it up. I won't help him."

Jerry smiles relieved and gives me a pat on the back. "That's what I'm talking about. You put your man in his place Quinzel."

I laugh. "I will I promise. And you better treat yours right, okay?"

"I will but I kinda don't have a choice in it do I? I mean that's how this whole soulmate thing works isn't it?"

"Yeah I guess."

Jerry finishes up his cup of coffee and tosses it in the trash. "Well, I'm here, you're here, Lyle's here, and the nutcase sure as hell is here. Wanna start things up a little early today? I'd rather get this over with. Standing in front of that door is the most boring part of my day."

Ignoring the nutcase jab, I jump at the opportunity to start our session early today. "Yes please," I respond eagerly. "I was killing time just waiting here. Let's go. I just have to grab my stuff from my office."

"Alright I'll meet you down there then."

"Cool," I answer.

* * *

When I walk into the therapy room, I'm surprised to find that the Joker's eyes don't immediately meet mine. As a matter of fact, he's too busy picking at the edge of the table to notice me. He's wearing an irritated expression. Oh boy…

"Good morning Mr. J, how are you today?" I get no response. I don't even get a second of eye contact. I pull my chair hard against the floor so that it screeches loudly and hopefully gets his attention. Of course that doesn't work. I take my seat across from him anyway. I hope he isn't going to be this way for the rest of the session…

I tap the table right under his nose to get his attention. "Hey, Mr. J are you alright?"

His eyes rise slowly to meet mine. He looks menacing, not at all like the Joker I've been meeting with these past weeks. When his eyes lock on to mine, a shiver passes down my spine. I can't help but feel scared, he looks like he wants to strangle me. As uncomfortable as I am, I don't look away. I do my best to appear unafraid with a touch of concern.

"You're upset. What happened?" I ask, hoping this has absolutely nothing to do with yesterday.

The Joker slowly smiles snidely. "Oh, I'm upset?"

I shift my eyes, confused. "Well aren't you? You certainly don't look happy."

"You know what _doc_?" The Joker says around a breathy sigh. "You don't know a _thing_ about me, so it would be wise of you not to make any… _assumptions_ on people you _don't_ know."

Woah. Okay hold up.

"I don't know you?" I ask, the irritation clearly heard in my voice. "Where is this coming from?"

The Joker rolls his eyes and whips his head from side to side, cracking his neck casually. "Oh it's the truth and you know it doll face. Don't act so surprised."

Damn. Where have the charm and flirtations gone? He's being so brusque with me…

"I only know what you tell me. Which is very little." I add in a small voice.

The Joker examines his mouth tattoo on his hand and smirks slightly. "I have my little _secrets_. But then again…" He looks at me. "So do you."

Where on Earth is he going with this? "What are you talking about?"

The Joker slams both hands down on the table roughly and growls at me. I visibly cringe away, afraid that he might slap me or something. He doesn't of course but he sure as hell looks like he wants to. "YOU! You really aren't the sharpest tool in the box are you, _Harl_ een?"

I'm speechless. He's yelling at me. He's never yelled at me before… I shake my head, not understanding. "Mr. J, I-I-"

"Oh you still don't get it do you?" He smiles sarcastically. "Why don't you run off and ask your little boyfriend when you get home? When you're snuggled up next to him at night, then maybe it'll come to you."

My jaw feels like it's about to hit the floor. This _is_ about yesterday. And he thinks Guy is my boyfriend! I have to clear this up right away.

"Mr. J the man that was here yesterday he's-"

The Joker growls roughly, cutting me off. "Hey! Guards! Get me out of here, I'm _done_." He yells to the orderlies on the other side of the door.

Jerry steps in looking confused. "Everything alright in here doctor?" He asks.

Too many words want to come out all at once. Everything is happening so fast, I wasn't anticipating any of this. I stammer over my words and nothing comprehensive comes out. "U-u-uhm-"

The Joker crosses his arms and smiles welcomingly at the orderly. "Jerry, boy am I _glad_ to see you. Get me outta here will ya _buddy_? I want to go back to my cell."

Jerry looks at the clown for second then at me with an 'is he serious' face. I shake my head and shrug my shoulders. Trust me Jerry, I'm just as confused as you are.

The Joker gets impatient waiting for Jerry and I to catch up, so he stands up and forces Jerry to rush to his side to escort him. "Bolton, heads up." Says Jerry, firmly tugging my patient by his upper arm. Lyle opens the door for the two and then assumes his place on the other side of the Joker. The door shuts quietly behind the trio, leaving me sitting in the therapy room alone, dumbstruck.

* * *

My day finished in the blink of an eye. Well… to be honest, I didn't even notice the hours pass. I've been stuck in this weird mental limbo all day. I can't believe what happened in that session. He yelled at me. He thought I was dating and living with Guy! Well, the latter is true, but we're best friends and nothing more. We can never be anything more, we both belong to other people. I belong to the Joker! A little part of me thought that he was beginning to understand that, but I guess not…

I sigh heavily and run my hand through my hair. I'm at home in bed right now, curled up beneath my sheets, trying to process everything.

I can't believe he cut our session short, He didn't even let me explain! He couldn't wait to get out of that room and away from me. That thought hurts me. It hurts me so bad, I can feel my heart constricting. My own soulmate couldn't stand to be in the same room as me… I feel so disgusting and unwanted. I have to fix this. I have to fix this. I'll just explain everything to him tomorrow. It'll be the very first thing that I do. I won't even greet him. I'll just walk in and explain everything. I need him to know that I'm not in a relationship. I need to be on his good side. I want my funny, charming Mr. J back, not the guy I was with today. He was cold and cruel. I have to fix this. I need us to be okay. I need us to be okay. I can't be okay if we're not okay. I need to fix this. I will.

* * *

The next day could not have come soon enough. This time I didn't bother to kill the waiting time. I alternated between pacing around my office and sitting in my chair tapping my foot repeatedly. I do have some actual work to do today but I was thinking of doing it after my session. I can't focus on it right now.

When it's finally time for me to head down, I grab my notes, his file, and a pen and head out the door. I walk rather calmly through the halls, considering that there's a fucking tornado of emotions whirling inside me. I'm just too anxious to get everything sorted out between the Joker and I. If it comes to it, I might even bring up that we're soulmates, because he doesn't seem to know it. If he does, then he's just being an ass.

I decide to take the stairs because I've been playing the waiting game all morning, I'm not about to wait even one minute more for a slow elevator to take me down a couple of floors. I need to keep my feet moving; it calms me, which is another plus. I need to calm myself down before I go confront him. I don't want him to see me all desperate and agitated. I need to keep a level head, and the long trip down the stairs will help me do that.

When I finally reach maximum security, I take a turn down the oh-so-familiar hallway to get to our session room. When I come around the corner, I'm surprised to find that there are no orderlies stationed outside the door. Where the hell are Jerry and Lyle? I look down both sides of the hallway, checking to see if they're strolling around. They're nowhere in sight. I walk up to the therapy room door and take a peek inside the room. The Joker isn't here… What the hell? It is our therapy time isn't it?

I walk down the hall to look at the nearest clock on the wall around the corner. Yup, it's 10:05. I'm five minutes late as a matter of fact. He should be here.

I have to find the orderlies and ask them what's up. I know there's a couple of guards stationed outside of the maximum security cells. Maybe one of them knows where I could find them. I'm not too sure where it is that the orderlies hang out. I doubt they'd be in the staff room. Maybe Jerry and Lyle are at least lurking around the maximum ward. Either way, let me go and see what's going on.

Outside of the entrance to the ward. There are two guards supervising the entry gate. I approach the one on the outside of the gate.

"Excuse me," I say. "I'm looking for two orderlies who were supposed to supervise a therapy session. Their names are Jerry and Lyle. Have you seen them around?"

The security guard scratches his head. "Uh, I know 'em but I ain't seen them around. Hey Chris." He says to the other security guard on the other side of the gate. "Have you seen Jerry or Lyle?"

"Yeah I think they're around. They might be around the corner. Let me go see, I'll bring them to you doctor."

"Thank you." I call out to him as he walks away. I hope they're in there somewhere. I've got questions and they better give me answers. I know they're both goofy guys who hate doing their work but I never thought that they would both hold out on me like this. Not like they do much anyway; they just stand outside of the door and escort the patient to and from his cell. What's the big deal? Just do your fuckin' job so I can do mine. I'm getting pissed now.

After a short moment, the security guard -Chris, I think?- returns with two white scrubbed orderlies following close behind him. Jerry and Lyle… Finally!

I put my free hand on my hip while the other holds my files lazily. I give them both a stern look and Jerry speaks up first before I get the chance to nag them. "I know, I know." He says defensively. "'Where the hell were you guys?' Is what you're thinking right?"

I nod.

"Well it wasn't our fault."

"Yeah," Lyle chimes in. "It wasn't. It was the clown. He doesn't want to come out today."

"Doesn't want to come out today?" I ask confused. "What do you mean?"

"He says he doesn't want to have therapy today." Answers Jerry. "He doesn't want to leave his cell."

Are you kidding me?! He doesn't even want to see me today! No. No way. H cannot be that upset. I want to explain myself and he has to listen!

"Well…" I start. "Is there any way that I can go and see him?"

Jerry and Lyle exchange a look. "I don't think that would be a good idea Dr. Quinzel." Says Lyle.

"Why not? If he's refusing therapy, I need to know why."

"Well…" Jerry looks to Lyle. "I guess she can give it a shot."

Yes! Hopefully now I'll get to explain myself to him. Lyle informs the guard to let me pass and he does. I swipe my I.D. card at the gate and then they buzz me through.

"Follow us doctor. He's in one of the isolation cells in the back." Jerry waves me over and I follow. There aren't as many cells down here in maximum as there are in the other wards. These cells though, are definitely nothing to sneeze at. They're all bulky individual units with a single small rectangular window on the doors of the cells. It's pretty sad to see. It almost looks inhumane to keep humans in there. For the most part, this ward is pretty quiet; which is a bit eerie. I guess it's because most of the patients in maximum security are more medicated than the patients from other wards. I guess they don't take any chances around here…

After we pass through the general area, the orderlies guide me down a hallway that leads to a very large room with three single unit cells in it. Four Guards are talking amongst themselves in a corner of the room. I'm sure they're supposed to be stationed around the room, but they must have been bored out of their minds standing alone.

"He's in the middle cell." Lyle points out. I start walking towards it but Jerry halts me by putting a hand on my shoulder. I look at him quizzically.

"You can talk to him through the door, but we can't let you in." He says. "It'd be too dangerous. If he tried anything, odds are we wouldn't be able to get to you in time."

I sigh. "That's fine." I guess…

Jerry releases me and I walk up hesitantly to the cell door. Is he really in there? I feel nervous so he must be. I poke my face into the cell door's glassless window and voila. There lies the man of the hour. Lying on his back on a cot, staring up at the ceiling with his hands behind his head. I guess he hasn't noticed me yet. It's pretty interesting watching him without him realizing. I know he's not doing anything but this is a side of him I never get to see. He looks so laid-back and comfortable with his hands unbound. It makes me wonder what he's like when isn't in the asylum and he's completely alone. I wonder what his sleeping face looks like. I bet it's adorable…

Sorry, gotta focus on the task at hand. I know.

I clear my throat to announce my presence. "Mr. J?"

His head turns in my direction and when he registers that it's me, he rolls his eyes and turns his body to rest on his side, his back to me.

You've got to be kidding me…

"Mr. J?" I say again and he doesn't respond. It irritates me. "J!" I call more sternly. "Are you seriously going to lie there and ignore me? We need to talk about what happened."

He doesn't answer. He doesn't even move. If I didn't know any better, I'd say he stopped breathing.

"Look I want to clear up what happened but how can I do that when you won't hear me out and let me explain?"

"…"

You know what I came here feeling nervous and scared and anxious… But now I'm starting to get really angry. I hate it when he ignores me and doesn't answer me!

"Joker are you seriously going to play this card right now?"

"…"

I sigh resignedly. Ugh, I want to talk to him and explain myself but I want him to be responsive when I do. For all I know he could have fallen asleep over there and then explaining myself now wouldn't fix anything would it? I calm myself through my sigh by a fraction and try coaxing him gently. "Mr. J? Won't you please talk to me?" I ask hopefully.

I get excited for a moment when I see the motion of his arm, but he only raises it to wave me away. "Go away _Harley_." He says.

Harley?

Is that some sort of nickname for me? Maybe on another occasion I would be thrilled to hear it, but right now I pay it no mind. I look at him sullenly. "Mr. J do you really not want to see me?" I'm ashamed to say that you can hear the hurt in my voice. He doesn't say anything, so I know what the answer is.

I slowly and reluctantly retract myself from the door's window. The guards and orderlies are too busy chatting amongst themselves to notice how terrible I look. I can't believe he rejected my company for the second time. I can't believe he doesn't want to see me. I'm his _soulmate_. Is what he's doing even possible? I feel so… I don't even know how to describe it. It's like there's a whole in my chest. Or more like a heavy pressure weighing down on me, making me feel incomplete and uncomfortable. But there's nothing I can do about it right now. Sure he's quiet, but I know he's not listening. If I tried to fix things now, it would just fall on deaf ears. I don't want to live with this feeling for another minute longer but I have no choice. I'll try again tomorrow. Maybe he just needs another night to get over it. Maybe tomorrow he'll listen to me. I pray to God that he does. I feel so disgusting and twisted up inside. The only way to make this go away is to fix us. I hope he listens to me tomorrow; I hope he does. I really do.

* * *

 **AN: YES! I was quick with this update!**

 **Thank you all for reading thus far, I hope you guys are enjoying the story.**

 **I want to thank everyone for the wonderful reviews that you guys are leaving. You all are too incredibly awesome! Thank you for all of the support and compliments, they are GREATLY appreciated. I would hug you guys if I could.**

 **I look forward to hearing more from you guys! I'll see you all in the next chapter. :D**


	15. Joker's Wild

**Chapter Fifteen:**

 **Joker's Wild**

This is one rough Saturday morning. I was so worked up yesterday in my emotional twister that I forgot it was Friday. That means that I have to wait until Monday to talk to the Joker again. I have to go through the whole weekend with this disgusting, uncomfortable feeling in my chest.

I've been lying in bed all morning. I only got up once to use the bathroom. I don't feel like doing absolutely anything today. Even eating seems too tedious. I just want to get through this weekend quickly. Although, laying here doing nothing isn't going to speed things up is it? But getting out of bed seems like too much work; I don't want to do it.

Ugh, I'm just going to lay here and wallow in my self-pity for the next two days. Is that so terrible?

I've been awake for a short while now; but even so, I try to close my eyes and drift into sleep once again. I can't torment myself with my thoughts if I'm knocked out, right? I've never been much of a dreamer, so I don't have to worry about nightmares or anything. I'll just fall into a peaceful dreamless sleep…

. . . . . . . . . .

There's a knock on my bedroom door.

"Ugh! What do you want?" I groan.

Guy takes this as an invitation to open the door and come in. "What's up with you? Why are you still in bed?" He asks.

I barely bother to lift my head up from my pillow. "I'm still tired."

Guy smacks his lips and plops himself down roughly on the edge of my bed, making me bounce and groan in protest to the movement. "There is _no_ way you're tired," he says. "You went to bed early yesterday. Are you sick or something?"

"My time of the month." I lie.

"Aw…" Guy pats my leg consolably. "Poor Harleen…"

I flip over to stare at him. "Did I just hear a hint of sarcasm?"

Guy smiles cheekily. "Of course not."

"Good." I say flipping back to my original position, turned away from him. "Because you have no idea how much we women suffer, and I don't feel like explaining it again for the umpteenth time."

"Does this mean you're going to be in bed all day?"

"All weekend." I answer grumpily.

"All weekend?! …Nope. Not happening." Guy rips my blanket away from me, leaving me cold and uncovered.

"Hey! What the hell Guy?!" I shout, trying to pry the blanket back from him.

"Come on. We need to do something today, it's Saturday."

"I told you, I don't feel well." I manage to pull the blanket up to my knees.

"Well suck it up princess." He says, yanking away the progress I made in pulling my blanket back. He tosses it to the other side of the room and I throw my face into my pillow stubbornly.

"No. I don't want to." I muffle.

"We don't have to leave the place, we can watch movies all day if that's what you want." He negotiates.

"Hmmm…"

Guy lays himself down next to me and starts repeatedly poking my shoulder. "We can binge watch a TV show and eat pizza and ice cream."

I slap his hand away to get him to quit jabbing at me and then flip over to face him. "I can lay on the couch all day?" I ask.

"Yup." He smiles victoriously. He knows I'm going to cave.

"Fine." I groan.

"Cool." Guy gets up and off my bed and calls back to me before heading out of my room. "Livingroom. Ten minutes."

Jeez man. So much for staying in bed… Hopefully TV will keep my mind off of things. Maybe this is a better way to spend my weekend. Whenever we binge watch a show, the hours just fly by. This'll probably speed up my weekend.

I rise up slowly from my bed, draping one leg over the edge lazily after the other. I then push off against the bed and stand on my feet. As soon as I do, the feeling to pee hits me and I walk over to the bathroom to do my business.

Ugh, stupid Guy always leaves the toilet seat up. I pull it down, then my underwear, _aaaannd_ release.

Oh.

What do you know, it _is_ my time of the month. Guess I'm not a liar today.

When I'm done using the bathroom, I go back to my room to grab my blanket then go to the living room and plop myself down on the couch. I hear the microwave ding and then slam close. A moment later, Guy walks into the room with a bowl of popcorn. I grin at him. "Ooh, a breakfast for champions huh?"

Because I'm sprawled out on the couch, Guy lifts my legs up to have a seat then he rests my legs back on his lap and places the bowl of popcorn over them. "This isn't my breakfast," he says between a handful of popcorn. "This is brunch."

I roll my eyes. "Oh, sorry. _Brunch_."

Guy reaches forward to grab the remote from the coffee table and turns the TV on. "So, what're we watching?"

I shrug. "I don't know. Whatever you want to watch. You were the one who wanted to binge something. I assumed you had something in mind."

"Hmm… I kind of want to watch Game of Thrones just to see what all of the fuss is about. But, I also wouldn't mind watching Shameless. I heard it's pretty funny."

"Hmm, which do you think will keep my attention longer?" I really want to focus on the show and try to be entertained. I'm trying to keep my mind off of you-know-who. "Actually, maybe we should just watch Game of Thrones." If Shameless is supposed to be funny then it must be a comedy. A comedy would only make me think of a certain clown…

"Game of Thrones?" He asks, opening up HBO NOW. "You're curious about all of the hype too huh?"

"Yeah," I lie.

Guy finds the show then hits play, and we both settle in for hours of lazy TV watching.

* * *

After we finished episode six, my stomach finally started growling. Guy's was doing the same. He pauses the credits before the next episode starts playing. "We should get pizza." He says.

I grin. "And ice cream." I honestly wasn't even planning on even eating today, but Guy has really lifted my spirits so my appetite came back. Now, all I want to do is EAT. The show really worked in distracting me. So much goes on that you've got to pay attention or you'll be lost.

"Well, we can't have ice cream delivered though…" says Guy.

"Hmm… that's true…" You know what, I am feeling better… I guess a little walk around the block to the store wouldn't be so bad. I'd actually kind of welcome it; my body is stiff. I'm not the kind of person who can just lay in bed all day; as much as I want to… I like to be on my feet. Years of athleticism I guess. Plus, I need to buy some pads and I know that Guy would probably feel uncomfortable if I sent him.

"You know what?" I say tossing the blanket off of me and sitting up. "I'll go get the ice cream if you order the pizza."

"Are you sure? I thought you weren't feeling well."

"I'm feeling better." I say getting off of the couch. "I could use a walk. I'm feeling stiff lying here all day."

"Okay, if you're sure." Guy says, pulling out his phone. "Sausage and banana peppers okay?"

"Yup." I head to my room to grab my wallet. When I walk back out, I hear Guy on the phone ordering the pizza.

I grab a black hoody from the coat hanger and tug it on. …This is Guy's; it's too big... I shrug. Oh well.

I pull the hood over my head and open the front door to take a step outside. I inhale the air as though I haven't had a taste of it in days. The day seems good. I close the door behind me and start strolling through the pavement. The walk seems to agree with me. My muscles are thanking me; they didn't want to be out of action all day.

As I walk slowly past each house in the neighborhood, I can't help but appreciate certain buildings. They're so much nicer than the one I'm living in; not that my building isn't good. But let me tell you, this neighborhood is a _whoooooollle_ lot _better_ than the one I was living in before I moved in with Guy. This neighborhood is quiet and neat. Everyone's lawn is well kept and the people are friendly. Mr. and Mrs. Hardler for instance are two of the nicest people I've ever met. They're the only neighbors that I've really gotten to know. I'll eventually start talking to more people around here, it's just that work keeps me busy and when I come home I'm not thinking about talking to anybody, I just want to hop into some PJs and watch TV. I heard that once a year in the summer, they throw a block party. I'd be happy to acquaintance myself with everyone then.

Five blocks down, there's a mini-mart run by an Italian man who is obviously prematurely bald because he looks way too young for that sort of thing to be happening to him. Either he has terrible genes or he did it on purpose. He's has to be in his early to mid-thirties I'm guessing. He greets me kindly when I step into the store.

I head straight for the freezers in the back, I've got ice cream on the brain. He's got a decent selection. There are various popsicles, some ice cream sandwiches, and (what I came for) some mini tubs of soft ice cream. They're so cute! Perfectly designed to be eaten by a single person without making them feel super guilty. Now that's my kind of treat.

Let's see… They've got vanilla, chocolate, strawberry, pistachio, and mint chocolate. Ugh, I am _not_ a fan of mint chocolate. Those are two flavors that I just don't think should ever be put together. Such a weird combination. I know Guy likes it though, so I grab one for him and a vanilla for myself. I'm kind of leaning towards strawberry but I _always_ get strawberry ice cream. I gotta switch things up sometimes.

I take my items to the counter and let the man ring me up. I throw in a pack of gum from the selection beside the counter. I finished my last pack two days ago and haven't bought a new one yet. I always like to keep a pack handy in my purse. You never know… Plus, my experience through school has taught me that gum brings people closer together. You whip out a pack of gum and pass it around, everybody likes you a little better. People don't often say no to a stick of gum. I certainly don't.

I reach into the back pocket of my pants to pull out my wallet. As I'm opening it to take out a ten, I hear something that startles me.

 ** _DO IT!_**

Shit! I whip my head around to see where it came from but immediately realize that the sound came from inside my head. _The Joker…_

I dropped my wallet during my whiplash reaction. It landed a little out of my way. I place my hand over my chest to calm myself before walking over to pick it up. The man behind the counter looks at me like I'm crazy.

"You alright miss?" He asks.

No. My stupid soulmate just shouted at the top of his lungs right in my ear. And you know what, I don't like the way this guy is staring at me. I can tell that he thinks I'm insane or something.

Well, if that's what he thinks…

"Yeah sorry, I was in Afghanistan. Saw some _reeeeal_ crazy shit. Sometimes I see them…" I glance around pretending to look nervous. "PTSD is nothing to sneeze at mister, trust me." I state matter of factly and shake my head disapprovingly.

"O-oh. I see…" He takes my money and then hands me back my change and looks like he doesn't quite know what else to really say. "Well, thank you for serving our country."

He hands the bag to me. "Oh, I didn't serve. I just had one _hell_ of a vacation." I smile at him and his contorted face as I leave. The man looks so confused and uncomfortable. "Bye!" I call cheerfully over my shoulder and let the door close behind me.

Yeah, I don't think I'll ever be shopping there again… Or maybe I will, just for a laugh.

I didn't appreciate the way he was looking at me. What if I really did have PTSD? That's a serious disorder; people feel bad enough without having strangers looking at them like they're insane. _Jeez_ … And just when I was starting to cheer up…

And what the heck is up with Mr. J? He yelled so loud and so close in my ear, I thought he was in the very same room. _Do it?_ Do what? What the heck is he talking about? Ugh, great my anxiety is kicking in again. I want to see him! I need to see him. What's he thinking? I want to try concentrating on him again and see if I can dig into his mind. But that's only worked once before and I got a nose bleed because of it.

My heart sinks. What if he's trying to escape. He's not ready to go out into the world. He hasn't changed. I haven't fixed him yet. If he leaves I will feel responsible for every life that he takes. But then again, maybe I'm overthinking this. If he got out, I'd know about it. The asylum would call and inform me right away. My mind is just racing. I need to calm down. Being away from your soulmate sucks! I can't wait for the day to come where we both can be together freely and without consequences. All of this separation is not doing my nerves any favors. I need to keep my patience in check and cool my mind. I'm sure that once I get back home and start watching TV with Guy again, I'll think about all of this less. It worked this morning and I'm sure it'll work again now.

I pick up the pace and hurry home.

 _Huh_?

The door's open. Why's the door open?

Could the pizza guy be here already? It's only been twenty minutes since I left. They couldn't have delivered _that_ quickly… Could they?

The door is carelessly cast wide open. If a pizza delivery guy were here. He wouldn't even really step into the place, would he?

As I approach the apartment, my pace reduces by half. With my curiosity piqued, slowing down allows me to understand and take in my surroundings better. I turn the corner approaching the house and I notice the steps and pavement are stained. Red footsteps pointed in my direction, leaving the apartment. They glisten, indicating that they're fresh. My eyes follow the tracks, searching for their origin as I slowly ascend the steps leading up to the door. When I reach the entrance, I keep my eyes transfixed on the tracks on the floor. Maybe it's because I'm avoiding the inevitable. Maybe I'm not ready to face what I think I'm about to face. Maybe I already know the truth…

I take a couple of steps into the apartment, eyes backtracking the glistening red. They lead into the living room until my eyes reach the pool, the source. A puddle of crimson on beige carpet. The puddle ripples. Falling drops disturb the pool's peace and add to its size. The drops fall from the edge of the couch. Vein-like trails of red decorate the back side of the couch. My eyes trail up to find the source. A head of short dark hair rests lazily over the edge; crimson drips from the short strands. My eyes stay fixated on the hair as I enter the room further. Slowly and shakily, I walk around the couch to see the face of that head. I already know who it is before I see him.

Guy slumps lifelessly on the couch. His face and chest decorated in red. There are slashes on his shirt, and a thick deep cut across his throat. I stand motionless just staring at him. Tears well up in my eyes making it harder.

I'm in shock. This can't be real… He's pranking me right? He's pranking me… He's gotta be.

I shake my head unwilling to accept the truth before my eyes. I take small steps forward and drop to my knees before him. I'm overwhelmed by the sight of him.

 _Guy_ … my sweet, _sweet_ Guy…

I stare at him for what feels like ages. His half-lidded eyes staring at nothing. With trembling cautious fingers, I close them. With my hand already hovering over his face, I smooth his cheek gently with my knuckles. Feeling braver, I rest my hand on the side of his face and stroke him lightly with my thumb.

Not you Guy… Not _you_ …

I rise up taking his red stained face in both of my hands and press my forehead to his. I finally let myself go. I sob uncontrollably. My tears fall to his face, somewhat removing stains of red. I shake my head against his forehead, not wanting any of this to be real. I look into his closed eyes, begging them to open. It breaks my heart knowing that they won't…

I look down solemnly and something catches my eye. A white piece of something tucked carelessly beneath the opening of his T-shirt. Curious, I pull it out slowly to examine what it is and my heart stops when I recognize it. My hand trembles as I scrutinize it. But I'm not trembling for the same reason I was before. Now… I'm shaking with rage.

I glare at the thin playing card. It's Joker's wild…

That. Son. Of. A. _Bitch_.

* * *

 **AN: Yeah... I'm a terrible person, I know...**

 **I didn't want to do it okay! But the Joker insisted... Who am I to say no to him?**

 **Yeah, things get interesting from here on out. The next chapter is one of my favorites!**

 **On a _much_ lighter note, I WANT TO THANK YOU GUYS FOR GETTING THIS STORY TO REACH 100 REVIEWS! I am so psyched about this that I actually want to take the time to actually thank some of you (what I like to call...) die-hard reviewers.**

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 **Spark Firebug**

 **Guest- _Thank You_ to _aaaaaaaaaalllllllll_ of you guys!**

 _ **THANK YOU**_ **everybody! I more than appreciate all of the support and reviews! I hope you all stick with the story and that I don't disappoint too many people. I know this chapter was a short and sad one but... necessary evil...? You guys'll see I guess.**

 **I'm not going to be able to do these kind of _Thank You_ 's often, but I hope to do them every 100 reviews. So, till then, I hope you guys keep reviewing so that I can thank you properly.**

 **As for the Joker POV that everyone keeps asking me about (LOL), I do plan on doing another one, but I don't think it'll happen until chapter... 17...? I'm not exactly sure, I don't have my outline in front of me right now. But I know it'll happen soon, for sure.**

 **Alright, I've been talking long enough. THANK YOU EVERYBODY. I'll see you all in the next chapter!**

 **R.I.P Guy Kopski.**


	16. Confrontation

**Chapter Sixteen:**

 **Confrontation**

That **Stupid** , sneaky, _fucked-up,_ son of a **Bitch**! I am so fuckin' furious, I can't even think straight. I can't believe he did _this_! What the _fuck_? Why the _fuck_?

I can't even-

I can't even think _right_ right now.

I'm so fuckin' sad my chest feels like it's going to burst with all of these twisted emotions trapped inside of me. I am a fuckin' roller coaster right now. One minute I'm unbelievably sad- bawling on the floor, clutching my chest- the next, I'm punching holes in the wall, imagining that I can see the Joker's fuckin' face painted on it.

I can't believe he did this. I can't believe he did this. I can't believe he _did_ this!

My best friend…..

Oh, here I go again… Wiping tears furiously from my face. I laugh a bit hysterically to myself. I am a _fuckin'_ **mess**!

I eventually got my shit together and called the cops. They pulled me out of the house so they could do a quick sweep of the place. They questioned me in the meantime and I told them everything…

…Well… almost everything.

When the police arrived and I saw the flashing red and blue lights outside of my window, for some strange reason unknown to me, I panicked. I made quick work of tucking the Joker's playing card away into my bra. I spent a good minute making sure that it was securely in place before opening the door. And when I was being questioned, I didn't mention finding it. When they asked me if I knew of anyone who could possibly be held responsible for this, I told them to look into the patients he was treating at Arkham. He had at least two particularly violent patients under his care who they could probably deem worthy enough to look into. Of course I know that this is all bullshit. I know who did this. But for some fuckin' reason, I can't bring myself to give up his name. I don't know why but I just _can't._

After standing outside for a while -letting paramedics and forensics do their thing inside- sniffling and blinking away tears, I can see someone running desperately and unbelievably fast towards me.

 _Shit_ … it's Sarah… I completely forgot all about Sarah…

She runs straight to me at such a speed that coming to a stop doesn't happen gracefully or quickly enough. I almost lose my balance completely when she practically lunges at me, gripping my arm with a strength I didn't know she had. The poor girl is shaking uncontrollably and mumbling incoherently. I place my hands firmly on both of her upper arms, trying to calm and steady her as best I can, considering that I'm becoming just as emotional as she is. Looking at her alone is breaking my heart. It's immediately obvious that she already knows.

"S-S-Sarah," I choke out between sobs. "I-I'm so sorry." I pull her in for a hug and she resists me. Shaking her head profusely in complete denial of the truth.

"No! _No._ " She wails, clinging on to me to steady herself from her wobbling knees that are ready to give away at any moment. I hold onto her firmly, trying to keep her balanced, restrained, and comforted. Eventually she hugs me back with the same force; crying into my shoulder and drenching my sweater. Abruptly, she pulls away from me enough to look at me. Pools of green surrounded by a pale frightened face confronts me.

In a broken, quiet voice that I can barely hear, she says, "He was my _everything_."

Tears trickle down my cheeks as I shut my eyes close to stop them with no success. I'm only beginning to process the severity of all of this. Sarah is losing her soulmate. Her _soulmate_ … I think that that is the _worst_ thing that could happen to a person. And it's happening to poor Sarah…

I can't believe this.

And to think, that this is all happening because of _my_ soulmate… This is fuckin' unbelievable.

I pull Sarah back into my embrace again and kiss her hair lightly, choking back tears. I pet her head coaxingly. "I know, I know," I answer absent-mindedly. I'm still processing everything in my head.

We stay like this for a couple of minutes until a couple of paramedics roll out a white tarped cot. Sarah looks up at the exact moment Guy's covered body comes into view. Sarah breaks away from me to run towards it. I'm stunned for a second but I recover quickly and run after her. I reach forward and grab her by the upper arm and tug her over onto the grass, clearing the sidewalk so that the paramedics can wheel Guy's body away. Sarah tries to break away from my grasp, and she manages to loosen my grip but I wrap my arms over and around her chest in a semi-restraint. She falls to her knees defeatedly and wailing; I go down with her, whispering things like, "Shh, shh, shh. It's going to be okay. I know. I know. I know."

By the time the body is loaded and out of sight, Sarah had stopped struggling against me considerably, so I loosen my hold on her a bit. Soon, I let go of her altogether and she held her own fine enough; until she didn't. She suddenly slumped against me. Confused, I turned her head to find that she had fainted.

"Oh my gosh-" I start fanning and patting her face and get no response. An officer steps out of the house and I wave him over, he comes running.

"What's wrong with her?" He asks.

"She fainted. Can you call a medic before they leave?"

"Of course." He runs over to the ambulance and returns with both of the paramedics. They pull Sarah from my grasp and start working on waking her. I watch, motionless and silent as they tend to her. The disbelief of everything that is happening is overwhelming. I can't believe that any of this is real. And _he's_ responsible…

I stand and slowly back away from the scene before me. I can't be here. I don't want to deal with this. I don't want to deal with any of this. I can't right now, there's something else weighing _much_ more on my mind…

I need to find that asshole. I don't know what I'm going to do but I need to see him- ask him what the fuck is wrong with him and what the fuck was he thinking! Why? Why did he do this? Guy didn't do anything. He did no wrong. He did no wrong to _anyone_. Guy is- _was_ a sweetheart… He didn't deserve this; no one does. And it's about time I get this through that fuckin' prick's head! He's going to pay for this.

I back away slowly from Sarah and the officers, moving toward the house. I open the door slightly and peer in to find forensics kneeling over something. I quietly reach my arm in towards the coat rack by the door and snake my hand into Guy's coat, pulling out his car keys. I close the door lightly behind me and scuffle unnoticed across the yard. I remember Guy complaining yesterday about how he had to park around the corner.

Oh my gosh I can't wrap my head around the fact that he was alive yesterday and now he's not. That tattooed, green haired son of a bitch! I can't wait to get my hands on him. I'm gonna tear him a new one, I swear.

Because I didn't get any calls from the asylum, I'm assuming he's there. I don't know how the hell he did this. Whether he slipped out unnoticed or had someone else do this- I don't know! All I know is that _he's_ responsible.

I find Guy's car parked around the corner where he said it would be. I unlock the door and slide into the driver's seat. I know how to drive. I just haven't done it in a while.

I start the car and head for the asylum. He better be there. If he isn't… I don't know where the heck he could be. It's not like he ever told me where his hide-out is.

I can't wait to confront him. I have a million and one questions that need to be answered. My anger only escalates when I think about everything and not having answers for anything. I can't wrap my head around it; why did he do this? Why Guy? I don't get it. But I'll know soon enough. I'm pulling up to the asylum right now.

At this point, I'm furious. Driving, sitting in the car fuming didn't help better my mood at all. I park the car carelessly in the mostly vacant parking lot and slam the car door behind me once I'm out. I stomp up to the front door of the facility when my reflection on the first glass door catches my attention. I look like shit and I have some dried blood on my forehead. I let my hair go from its ponytail and comb through it with my fingers. I rub my eyes with my sleeves to get rid of any eye boogers or dried tears. When I pull my hands away from my eyes, I notice for the first time that my hands are covered in dried blood too. I stare at them for a moment and my fingertips tremble at the recollection of how they got this way. Guy's face…

A couple of tears slip away from my eyes without my permission. I need to pull myself together. If a staff member saw me like this, then I'd have to explain everything and I don't have the time nor patience for that. I use my tears to my advantage by soaking them up on my sleeve. I use my now damp sleeve to rub the blood on my forehead clean off. As for my hands, I can't really do anything there. Rubbing them on my clothes would only make me look worse. So, I decide to just pull my sleeves over my hands and keep them in my pockets as much as possible.

I take a deep breath before finally pushing the doors open and stepping inside the building. I'm met with a quizzical expression from the lady in the front desk. I can understand it. I look really bad right now. Huge sweater, dirty jeans, disheveled hair… I don't look like a doctor at all. I don't normally stop at the front desk because I don't have to; I'm immediately recognized when I walk through the door. So, I can't remember what this woman's name is exactly. Was it Tasia or Trisha? Or something else… Oh well, I'll gamble.

"Hey Trisha-"

"It's Tasia." She cuts me off with a polite smile. She doesn't look truly bothered by my mistake so I take this as a good sign of her character.

"I'm so sorry. I'm- I'm having a rough morning. I jumbled up your name."

"No worries Dr. Quinzel. I get it." She smiles and waves away my apology. "Anyway, what brings you in on a Sunday?"

My voice lowers an octave unintentionally. "Yeah, actually, I was wondering if anything had happened here yesterday."

"What do you mean?" She asks confused.

"Oh, you know- did anything _happen_?" I stress the word and realize that it's not really going to help her understand any better.

She furrows her eyebrows. "Umm… _no_?"

I look surprised. "Really? No incidents or anything like that?"

"Oh!" She exclaims with realization. "No nothing happened. Why do you ask?"

"Oh, no reason. Just-" I scratch at my head coming up short with an answer. "It's just a… a bad dream I had last night." I chuckle nervously.

She smiles comfortingly at me. "I understand doctor. With the number of dangerous and violent patients that you all have to treat here, I understand the paranoia. But I can assure you, nothing is out of place here. If something was, I would most likely know about it."

I release a sigh of relief. "Thank you Tasia, I'm just going to step into my office for a while since I'm already here."

"Of course, go right ahead."

I move past the front desk and head down the left hallway towards the caged elevator that'll take me straight down to maximum security. I have no reason to go to my office; What's about to happen isn't a therapy session. I have no files I need to grab, no white coat. All I want to do is give him a piece of my mind.

The elevator drags and once I'm in it, I feel incredibly nervous. But then I remember my last image of Guy and my rage is renewed. I cross my arms and tap my foot impatiently while staring at the elevator's ceiling. This heap of shit isn't moving fast enough!

 _Ding!_

Finally. This door can't open fast enough. As soon as I know that I can fit, I squeeze through it. I stomp down the hallway until I reach the maximum's security gate where I'm greeted by the usual man on guard. He knows that I don't have any technical authorization to go in there, so it's not like I could talk my way through here. That's fine, it's not like I was thinking of talking to him in his cell. Guards are always stationed outside of it. Any conversation we would have there, wouldn't be private. No, what I need to do is get him into our therapy room.

"Excuse me," I say to the security guard. "By any chance is Jerry or Lyle somewhere in there?"

The guard nods. "Yeah, Jerry is. Lyle's off today."

"Can you call him then? I need to speak with him."

"Yes ma'am." He says obligingly and then speaks into the walkie-talkie on his chest. "Hey Ronny, is Jerry with you?"

"Yeah I'm lookin' right at him," says the man on the other side of the conversation.

"Tell him to come to the gate. Dr. Quinzel is looking for him."

"Sure thing."

The guard addresses me. "He'll be right out."

"Thank you," I answer.

I twiddle my thumbs while I wait and am reminded of how stained my hands are. Not two minutes pass before Jerry appears on the other side of the gate. I pull my sleeves over my hands and cross my arms as an extra precaution.

He looks at me confused. "Quinzel, what's up? It's Sunday, what brings you here?"

I nod him over, directing him towards the hallway away from the security guard. "Can I talk to you for a second?"

He comes through the security gate and follows me into the hallway, out of earshot from the guard. I speak in a hushed voice. "I need you to do me a _huge_ favor. Can you bring the Joker to our therapy room right now?"

"What? Doctor I can't do that-"

"Yes you can. I _know_ you can."

He shakes his head. "No, it's not his therapy time, I can't move him. What is this really about?"

I sigh exasperated. Jerry has _never_ annoyed me the way he is right now. "Look, I keep $120 tucked under the lamp on my desk as 'just in case' money. I leave my office door unlocked. If you move him for me, that money is yours."

"What? Doctor are you serious-"

"Yes. And if that's not enough I can give you another $100 the next time I see you. I don't have it on me but I'm good for it, I promise." There's no way he's going to turn this down. He loves money too much.

He looks torn, really considering the bribe. Finally, he shrugs. "What the hell, I'll do it. And because you're a friend, I'll only do it for $120."

I sigh, relieved. "Thanks. And I don't need you to stand guard either. I'd like to be alone with him for fifteen minutes at least."

"Quinzel are you sure that's what you want? Seems like a death wish to me. You know what he's capable of and if I'm not there-"

"Fifteen minutes. That's all I'm asking Jerry."

Jerry shrugs and turns away after shooting me an _I hope you know what you're doing face._ "Okay, you're the boss I guess…"

Once he's disappeared behind the security gate, I turn and walk down the hall towards our therapy room. I open the heavy door and step in, remembering the last time I was in here. He had cut our session short that day, preferring to go back to his grimy, lonely cell rather than spend another minute with me. And I haven't truly spoken to him since. When I visited his cell, he didn't really hear me out at all.

Well… that's not going to happen this time. I'm going to make that mother fucker answer to everything that I have to say! I want to know why he took the closest and most precious person in my life away from me…

 _No._ Don't do it Harleen. Don't start crying now.

I take a deep breath fighting the urge to tear up, and move around the steel table. I look out the tiny window opposite the door and rest my bum on the edge of the table. There's nothing interesting out there, nothing to really distract me. I cross my arms and focus on the clouds outside. I'm doing my best to meditate and not think about anything in particular but this overwhelming rage and sadness are preventing me from keeping my head cool. I'm sort of glad about it though. I _want_ to stay mad. Staying mad will keep me strong; keep me from crumbling, which is what I _don't_ want to do. I don't want to cry in front of him, which is what I'm afraid I'm going to do.

The door opens suddenly behind me. I make no immediate move to turn around and greet him or even acknowledge his presence. I continue staring out the window, listening to the shuffling behind me. When it sounds like the Joker is finally seated, I hear Jerry loudly whisper, "Don't you _dare_ try anything clown." A moment later I hear the door close, leaving me alone with my _patient_.

For a minute, neither of us says a word. I know I've been anxious to confront him, but I just can't make myself turn around right now. That is until he speaks… I can hear that sinister smile on his lips as he does.

" _Well_ , well, _well_ … _Doc_ tor, I never thought you'd be so… _bold._ " I turn to look at him slowly but I don't move from my place. I try to maintain an indifferent expression but I can feel the mild hint of a scowl being conveyed by my eyes. If he notices it, he doesn't seem to mind it at all. As a matter of fact, he seems quite content with himself. That _bastard_. "You know _doc,_ I knew ya liked me, but I'll admit- I didn't think you liked me _that_ much. I mean- sending the orderly away so we can get some… _alone-time._ " He says the last words provocatively and then cackles, his silver teeth gleaming with every movement of his mouth. "You know… I like you too _Harl_ een. But I think we should take it _slow_. Don't you think?"

Without changing my expression, I ask, "That can't honestly be why you think I'm here, can it?" You can hear the _calm before the storm_ in my voice. It makes his grin widen.

He feigns ignorance and shrugs his shoulders exaggeratedly. "Why _else_ would you want to be alone with _me_ _doc_ tor? What _couldn't_ wait until our next session?"

I stare at him unmoved and speak more sarcastically. "Really? You really have no other idea as to why I'm here? None at all?" My voice is rising. My composure is slipping.

The Joker is pensive for a moment and then he shrugs again. " _Nope_. Nothing comes to mind."

This time I turn to fully face him. "You _lying_ piece of **shit**! You're going to sit there and pretend you don't know what I'm talking about?"

The Joker throws his head back and laughs.

"Stop laughing!" I shout. "This isn't funny! You know what this is about."

Of course he doesn't stop. He is slapping the table, overcome by his laughter. He tries his best to calm down enough to speak but doesn't stop laughing completely. "You know- You sound like you _belong_ in a place like this-" He gestures to the room around us. "Keep this up _Harl_ een, and you and I can be _bunkies_."

That does it.

I slap him hard across his face. His head whips to the side from the blow and his laughter ceases instantly. He stays in that position for a moment. Embracing the sting of the pain. Then he looks back at me with a predatory look in his eyes. All signs of humor are gone. I know that this is the part where I should be scared, but I'm too angry to make any wise decisions.

"I am getting _sick_ and _tired_ of **you**." I lean in closer to look him dead in the eyes while I speak to him. "You are the most complicated person I have ever met. Do you know how _big_ of a headache you are to me? Do you? Everything you do makes _no_ sense to me. None at all. You sit there and pretend like you don't know what I'm talking about, but you do… You killed Guy." I pause to look for any hint of recognition in his face but I don't find a damn thing. He hides his emotions well when he wants to. "He was my best friend. The person who I cared for more than anyone. I _loved_ him." At this his lip curls into a snarl; his face is that of anger and slight disgust. "You _took_ him from me, you _sick_ , _demented_ , **freak**. And I wanna know why."

For a minute he just glares at me. Then, his lips stretch into a tight smile that doesn't quite reach his eyes. "So… _That's_ why you're here… Little Harleen is sad because she thinks I killed her boyfriend."

"I don't _think_ you did it. I _know_ you did."

"But how could I have done it? Look around you toots; it's not like I can just walk outta here whenever I want-"

"Well then you had someone else do it for you!" I pull out his stupid playing card that I've been keeping in my bra and toss it right at his face. The air resistance against the paper card doesn't help though. It completely misses him and lands on the floor to his side. Luckily it lands facing up so that when he turns to look at it, he knows exactly what it is. When the Joker looks back at me, he's smiling. "Why the hell did you do it? Tell me right now!"

"You know, _Harl_ een-" He leans in close to me, his nose only an inch away from mine. "I don't have to explain myself to you. I can do… _whatever_ I want. _Whenever_ I want."

I'm done containing myself. "You _cocky_ son of a _bitch_!" I right hook him on the side of his mouth as hard as I can. He falls out of his seat to the ground. His hands are cuffed together, so he isn't able to break the fall with his hands well. His elbow ended up breaking his fall, which I'm sure must have hurt like hell. For some reason I'm smiling down at him. I can't hide the bout of satisfaction that I feel knowing that I was capable of physically hurting him like this. It's twisted, I know. I'm not even sure that soulmates should be capable of feeling this gratification. But I'm so _angry_ at him that this feels so good right now.

He manages to sit himself up and then wipes at his mouth. He stares at the back of his hand which is now glistening red. When he looks up at me, he gives me a wicked predatory smile. " _Ohhh_ … So you wanna _play_ huh?" Before I know it, he's lunging at me. He jumps to his feet with ease and throws me a punch of his own below my right eye. Before the shock of the blow can even set in, he has me pinned against the wall. His cuffed hands are wrapped securely around my throat. He isn't choking me, but the threat is very obvious.

We've never been _this_ close before. We've never had this much contact with each other before. It's overwhelming. I can feel the heat of him, and his scent is intoxicating. For a millisecond, I forget that I want to hurt him and all I know is that I _want_ him. I feel like I can see something similar in his eyes. We involuntarily pull each other closer. Our lips are a beat apart when I realize what we're about to do and my rationality clocks back in, followed quickly by my rage. I bring my knee up as quickly and as roughly as I can and manage to get him good on his lower gut (although I was aiming much lower). I wind him but he doesn't loosen his grip on me one bit. As a matter of fact, he tightens it.

I can barely get any air into my lungs, but I try to speak even so. "Let- let go of me!" My voice is too raspy, I didn't sound as clear as I did in my head. The Joker finds this hilarious. He laughs right in my face and I can feel his hot breath hit me.

"What was that _doc_? I didn't quite catch that." He turns his head to the side and brings his ear mockingly close to my mouth. I try to scream but I just can't. So instead, I whip my head forward and grab his ear with my teeth, biting as hard as I can. I hear him growl and his grip on me loosens. I gasp for air and push him away, moving to the opposite wall to put what little space I can in between us. He rubs at his ear assessing the damage through touch. When he brings his hand back into his view, he frowns at his blood stained fingers. "Cheap shot." He says more to himself than to me.

At this point, my mentality can't take this anymore. All of this anger, lust, and fear accumulates into tears; and that just makes things worse. I didn't want to cry in front of him. I hate that this is happening right now but I can't make them stop falling. Everything is too much right now.

When I look up, he's staring at me. He looks annoyed, but at least he seems attentive enough.

"Just stop with this bull shit. I don't want to do this anymore." I choke on the last word. I'm doing my best to stop my sobs. "I could have dealt with everything you know? I was willing to overlook your past- all those people you killed- all of the things you've done- Everything! But _this_ \- you crossed a _huge_ line here. I don't think I can _ever_ overlook this. You- you killed my best friend! He was all I had, and you killed him! Look-" I hold my palms out so he can see the copper stains on them. "I still have his blood on my hands! Now when I think of him, all I can see is his mutilated body! He didn't deserve that! No one does! He was like a brother to me…" I put my face in my hands and leave it there for a moment to let out a couple of sobs. I honestly would have fallen to my knees and gave in to my sadness right then and there if I hadn't heard him speak. It was a whisper, almost inaudible; but I heard it.

" _Brother?_ "

I remove my hands slowly from my face and glare at him. "Yes. You fucking _idiot_. You heard me right; I said _r_." I enunciate the word exaggeratedly. "He was a _brother_ to me. Something you would have known if you would have fuckin' listened to me when I tried to tell you! But oh no! Mr. J wanted to be a baby and sit in a corner and cry all day. I mean- you are such a _dumbass_! You thought he was my lover? My boyfriend? You are so fuckin' _stupid_ if you have _ever_ thought that I could be with anyone who isn't you- I mean, we're fuckin' **soulmates** for _Christ's sake_!"

I heard what I said a second after I said it. My face transforms from one of anger to one of realization. Shit, I can't believe I just said that! I don't know if he knows or not. From what I understand, he doesn't; but how could he not? Surely somewhere inside him he knows, right?

He isn't looking at me anymore. He's not really looking at anything. He looks truly confused, like he's trying to work something out in his head.

In a low astonished voice, I ask, "Did you really not know?"

He doesn't answer, or even acknowledge that I spoke to him. His absent eyebrows just deepen in their furrow.

I shake my head slowly in disbelief. " _Wow_ … I feel _so_ sorry for you. You just- You can't see a good thing when it's staring you in the face can you?" As if proving my point, he stays in that pensive state and doesn't look up at me. "You know what? I feel even _more_ sorry for _myself_ , because I now believe that you're incapable of any form of love."

I stare at him for a minute, hoping that he'll snap out of it and contradict what I said. But he doesn't…

I roll my eyes, shake my head and move past him towards the door. I'm finished here. He isn't even being responsive anymore so what the hell is the point.

Down the hall around the corner, I find Jerry messing with his phone. "I'm done Jerry, send him back."

"Jesus! Look at you! He hit you?" He points to my right eye.

I wave him away. "Don't worry about it. Actually- His ear is bleeding pretty badly, so you might want to take care of that before you take him back to max." I pat him on the shoulder and start walking away.

"Aw, come on Quinzel; how the hell am I supposed to explain that?"

"You'll figure something out Jerry," I say over my shoulder. I don't want to deal with any of this right now. I can't. I need to get out of here and figure out how the hell I'm going to live with myself now.

* * *

 **AN: Harleen said so many bad words in this chapter that I was considering changing the story to M at this point, but I didn't want to get any hopes up for something that wasn't going to happen in this chapter. Because we all know what a good rated M story entails Right? ;)**

 **And guys, I know I drag with the updates. I suck. If I'm ever taking too long, please just yell at me. Sometimes I need someone to just scream at me to get me back on track. I mean- don't be mean about it, just be really loud. Shouty capitals and all~**

 **Anyway, the next chapter is the one you guys have been waiting for. It's a Joker point of view. Although, I'm thinking I won't write it in the same way I wrote the last one. And it probably won't be as long as these chapters normally are but I'll try to make it longer than his last POV.**

 **Thank you guys so much for sticking with this story. Don't forget to review, I really appreciate them. I'll see ya all in the next chapter!**


	17. Decisions, Decisions

**Chapter Seventeen:**

 **Decisions, Decisions**

Crying.

All he heard was crying. Day in, and day out. Crying.

He wished that he could make it stop but nothing he did rid him of the sound. Ever since that day that he had that "therapy session" with Dr. Quinzel, he hasn't been able to have a moment's peace. It's been over a week since then and the crying has been _insistent._

The Joker sat alone in his cell with the side of his forehead pressed forcibly against the wall. The side of his face was tinged pink from previous attempts to _bang_ the sounds out of his head. He looks up at the ceiling and thinks to himself, _If I wasn't crazy before…_

He just wanted her to _stop_. He couldn't take this much longer. He was faintly familiar with this voice in his head, but she had just been getting _too_ familiar with him in there. He could swear she had never been this loud before. Perhaps it was because now he could put a face to it. The Joker -like everyone else- knew of the existence of that one perfect someone who was out there in the world waiting to find their other half; he just had no idea someone was waiting for him. It never occurred to him really. He never fantasized or thought about love ever. This new bit of information that he had received from Dr. Quinzel came as a shock to him. He definitely wasn't expecting it…

At first, when she told him, a million different things ran through his head. _Is she for real? She's gotta be joking right? Should I just kill her? Nip this thing in the bud? I should, shouldn't I? But what if I can use this somehow? Can I make this fun?_ He was frozen, processing everything. And he still hadn't finished, he was still processing the information. To be honest, he didn't know what to do with it. His nature demanded that he be rid of her. She was a liability. A sign of weakness. He didn't need that, and he sure as hell didn't want that. But something in him told him to do otherwise. He couldn't explain it. Something in him screamed at him to not only keep her alive, but to keep her _close_ as well. He couldn't understand the impulse. As chaotic and unpredictable as his own mind was, the Joker was _very_ good at interpreting his emotions and impulses. But _this_ \- This was _beyond_ him. He never bothered to look into the whole soulmate connection or whatnot, so he wasn't sure if this feeling had anything to do with it or not. He was sure that it did though; it was a pretty good guess considering how now that he knew about this whole thing, these emotions just _happen_ to rise in him.

But, if he was truly honest with himself, this isn't something that just started after her confession. It was dull… and unnoticeable… but it was there. An inexplicable pull that she had on him. He wasn't ashamed to admit that he was attracted to her. He was a man after all, and she was _beautiful_. Who wouldn't be attracted to her? The problem was that that dull achy feeling that she caused him to feel, was beginning to feel like a sensation that went beyond mere attraction. He wasn't sure if he was okay with this development or not. He kept looping in his mind what this meant for _him_. Did this put him at a disadvantage or was this somehow advantageous? Should he end this or delve into this? He wasn't sure. At the moment, the only thing he was certain about was that he wanted her to _shut the fuck up_!

Her sobs weren't helping his thinking process. They were a constant reminder of the problem he was facing and the decisions that he would have to make. Although he had to admit that the more he heard them, the more appealing the idea of killing her was looking.

 ** _Guy… Guy… Why? Why?_**

 _Ugh, shut up shut up shut up shut up! Why the hell is she crying so much anyway? Apparently that guy wasn't her boyfriend, so what's the big deal?_ _Oh, but she did say that he was her brother, didn't she? Still, how great can a family be for someone to cry about them this much!_

The Joker rubbed at his temple wishing that she was there with him in his cell so that he could give her something to _really_ cry about. If he knew that having that idiot killed was eventually going to bite him in the ass, he would have never done it… _Nah, I still would have done it._

The Joker thinks back to the first time he saw Dr. Quinzel. He paid her no mind at first glance. What caught his attention was her laugh. It had a familiar beautiful melodic ring to it; and he swore that it wasn't the first time that he had heard it. Whenever he thought back to that memory, he always recounted her laughter and the way her glossed lips pulled from the action. However, looking back now, he remembered the reason she was laughing that day. It was because of something that other doctor had said. The brother. The Joker snarled at the recollection. _Great… A good memory tarnished._

 _ **Why?... Why?...**_

 _Yes. Why? Why? Why won't you shut up all ready!_ What could he do to make her forget about all this? He had to do something to get her to stop or this insistent sobbing would never end. It was too bad that he was still behind bars. If he was out, there were a million things that he could do. He'd probably take her out for a night on the town. Show her what it means to truly be alive. She'd have so much fun, she'd completely forget about what's-his-name. But unfortunately, for the time being he needed to stay put. Things weren't ready for him on the outside yet, and it would be awhile... He could send one of his guys over there with a cheer-up gift. But… something told him that that wouldn't sit well with her. In fact, it might even make things worse. _Okay, scratch that. Scratch that._

He thought about it for a while and realized that he had come to the ultimate conclusion to keep her alive. Why? He didn't know. Maybe his subconscious had a plan for her that he just wasn't seeing yet.

He also was reluctant to admit that there really wasn't anything that he could do to get her to stop crying. With him behind bars and her not showing up for work, there wasn't much he could do really. He had been told by one of the orderlies that Dr. Quinzel had requested to take a whole month off, so he wasn't going to be having any form of therapy for the time being. They didn't trust any other doctor with him and that's exactly how he had orchestrated it. He couldn't tolerate anyone else. Everyone else was boring. If he complied with every doctor they sent to him, then he would be seeing several doctors a week. _Because let's face it. I'm not the kinda guy who should only be seeing one shrink._

He wasn't surprised that Harleen had requested time off; he had expected her to. What surprised him was that they actually agreed to give her so much time off. A month was a long time. He hoped that she would snap out of whatever she was going through soon. He didn't want to have to endure through this for the next three weeks. But if she didn't, then he'd have no choice but to sit there and listen to every sob. It was a sort of punishment for him, for what he had done; being forced to listen to the consequences of his actions. He couldn't help but laugh. She was torturing him in her own way and she didn't even know it. Who else could do that to him? _No one, that's who._ He found it extremely intriguing the way she could affect him sometimes. He was cautious about it, but he was intrigued none the less. The blonde had a way about her that just kept him interested. And that was another thing; her hair. The Joker never thought he had a thing for blondes but sometimes, he'd oddly find himself thinking about how well it completed her. He pictured her as a brunette and a red head and she just didn't look right. A ridiculous thought to have, he knew it. But to be fair, all he could do was think _all_ day and night in his boring cell; he couldn't help the trivial things that crossed his mind.

He looked over to his cot and reached under the thin mattress to pull out a silver toothed toy that he had haphazardly hidden away. It was too easy to hide things in his cell. No ever dared to enter. As long as anyone didn't visibly see him with anything, they made the cautious decision to just leave him be. He gave the toy a one over and laughed. It really was a ridiculously hilarious gift. He remembered Harleen's face that day. How happy she had gotten when he had given her his approval. He idly thought about how he enjoyed the way she looked when she smiled…

The Joker frowned at himself.

He would be patient, for now. He was going to let her grieve. He had no choice really. Perhaps by the time she came back in to work, she'd be back to her old self. He was sure that she would be. _A person can only cry for so long, right? Yeah- she'll cry herself out and then she'll be fine. She'll get over it._ And with that, the Joker laid back on the cold ground and closed his eyes to dream of God knows what.

 ** _Why? Guy… Why?_**

"Ugh…" He groaned and covered his ears with his hands, rolling to his side. Sleep would be impossible for him this night, and many nights to come.

* * *

 **AN: I guess those shouty capital reviews worked. I saw them and I felt pressured to update...**

 **I hope you guys enjoyed this, I warned you's that this would be short though.**

 **Thank you guys so much for sticking with this story, I appreciate all of the support. I really do.**

 **Looking forward to seeing you all in the next chapter! Peace.**


	18. Changes

**Chapter Eighteen:**

 **Changes**

Waking up in the morning was not easy today; nor has it been for the last couple of weeks. My alarm clock roared to life at nine a.m. When I opened my eyes, I could literally feel the crust on the lids of my eyes breaking apart after having been closed for so long. Sleep is amazing. My emotions don't get to me when I sleep. I don't dream so I'm blessed with hours of peace when asleep. That's why I've recently made it a habit of getting twelve hours of sleep. My body hates me for it but my brain could not be grateful enough.

Today is the day I've been dreading all month; it's time for me to go back into work. I'm not looking forward to it at all. I have been seriously considering quitting just to get away from it all but every time I work myself up to it in my head my gut tells me not to; and it's right. I've advanced so much in my career at Arkham. The facility is dripping with all kinds of colorful different cases and patients that the experience I get working there is equivalent to that of someone who has worked at ten different facilities. So I'm just going to stay put.

To be honest, going back to Arkham Asylum isn't what's really bothering me… it's seeing _him_ again. I've tried not to think about him. I've been mentally avoiding him. I've come to terms with what he's done. He killed my best friend. I'm alone now and it's all his fault. I understand this horrible truth but… now what? Now I have to go back and be his doctor again? It's not going to be easy. I'm going to try for the sake of trying but it is not going to be easy. The only thing that's making this whole situation tolerable to me is the fact that I've become a bit numb to the idea of the Joker. I don't feel anything thinking about him now. Not even anger. I've passed that phase I guess. If I do feel anything for him now, it's disappointment. But for the most part, somewhere during this time, I've managed to close my heart to him. I just- I really don't feel anything for him right now. I haven't heard a peep from him this whole time. Which isn't much of a surprise but perhaps it's also a reflection of the change in my feelings for him. I'm not sure. I'm just going to use this indifference to my advantage and try to get back into the swing of things.

I'll tell ya right now that things are not going to be the way they were. We're not going to be "buddy-buddy" like we used to be. I'm not going to indulge him like I used to; I can't do that anymore. I'm just going to try to do my job and that's that.

As soon as I get out of bed I hit the shower quickly and then iron out my clothes. It's a simple pale pink blouse with black dress pants. I tie my hair in a low lazy ponytail and don't even bother wearing any makeup.

When I step out of my room I'm saddened by the sight of my new apartment. I had to move out. There was no way I was going to stay in the same building where Guy lost his life. My apartment isn't nearly as nice as the one we used to share, and the neighborhood is also not nearly as nice. It's a relatively safe area considering the city I live in, but it's nothing like the friendly neighborhood Guy and I had lived in. I live a little bit outside of Chinatown now. A lot of creeps hang out in Chinatown but they don't hang out on my block or anything, so I'm good. My apartment is so sad though. It's so empty. I haven't had the energy to really decorate.

Before, it was fun combing my stuff with Guy's and having the place decorated with things that we somehow made go together. Now, I just have all of my boring stuff. Sarah took nearly everything that belonged to Guy. The poor girl. She said she wanted to surround herself in everything that was his. She put up all of his stuff in her place. When I visited, I couldn't help but feel such pity for her. Her place looks like what I imagine it would if she and Guy would have moved in together. I get the sick feeling that Sarah is sort of advancing the relationship that she doesn't even have anymore. I've tried being a psychiatrist to her without her knowing that I was. It worked the first couple of visits but eventually she picked up on what I was doing and basically denounced me as her friend. She was really angry. She said I thought she was crazy, which I didn't of course. I was just trying to nudge her into a healthy course of coping with the loss. I suggested getting rid of all of Guy's stuff and she went berserk. She hasn't spoken to me since. I've tried calling, but all I get is a voicemail each time. I only hope that she finds _someone_ to talk through everything she's going through. Maybe hearing it from me hit too close to home for her.

There was one thing of Guy's that I managed to keep though. I don't know how I did it, but I managed to keep his car. It's been nice having it. Driving it reminds me of when Guy and I would go to work together. I still get sad when I think about him, but a little less so than before. I've been balling my eyes out over him for so long, that I've finally reached the point where I can look back at the good memories and not burst out crying immediately. I've been grieving him healthily, so moving on with life is going way easier for me than it is Sarah.

After toasting and forcing down two strawberry pop-tarts, I head out to the car and drive towards the asylum. I park in Guy's usual spot and head into the building. Some lady at the front desk welcomes me back warmly and I return her kind greeting. I take the slow elevator up to my floor and go straight to my office. The door is locked. It must have been the cleaning people. I dig out the key from my coat pocket and open up the door. My office looks just as I left it. I also note that there's not a speck of dust to be seen. The next time I see any of the janitors, I'm going to have to thank them. They've really been on top of things here.

Several people stopped by to welcome me back and offer their condolences. I thanked them graciously and tried to get back to the paperwork that's been abandoned this whole time. I stopped by human resources to get some more stuff that I needed to fill out and then once that was done I stopped by the cafeteria to get a cup of coffee. It's my first cup in weeks. I've been honoring Guy by not going anywhere near the stuff. But I figure I could use a pick-me-up now. I take my coffee back to my office, preferring to sip in solitude. When I look at the clock, I see that it's nearly time for the Joker's therapy session. I guess I should quickly catch myself up with his treatment. Looking at his file, it looks like they've been continuing to give him the medication that I prescribed but he hasn't had a single ounce of therapy since. Does that mean he's been locked away in his cell this whole time? Don't get me wrong, I don't feel sorry for the guy at all. I'm just surprised that he was never let out to stretch his legs. From a humanitarian perspective, that's cruel. Luckily, I'm no humanitarian with regard to the Joker; not anymore at least.

When the time comes, I grab all I need and head down to max. Lyle and Jerry are both standing outside of the room.

"Welcome back doctor," said Lyle.

"Yeah, welcome back Quinzel. We missed ya kid," said Jerry smiling.

"Aw, I missed you too, you old fart." I playfully slap Jerry on the shoulder. "How's he been?" I nod towards the door.

Jerry shrugged. "As good as he can get. We haven't had any problems, have we Bolton?"

"Nope. Not a one."

"Good. Then I guess it's time for me to go in there and do my thing." I say with more courage than I feel.

Jerry grabs my arm suddenly when I try to walk past him. In a lowered voice, he says, "You know you don't have to stick with this clown right? There are plenty of other people here who you could treat. You don't have to do this."

I look at Jerry solemnly. He must have put two-and-two together. I pat his hand off of me. "Let's see how this goes, okay?" I smile encouragingly and he nods once, accepting my decision.

When I open the door, I'm greeted by the biggest silver toothed smile I have ever seen in my entire life. I'm a little surprised to find that my heart doesn't skip that familiar beat that it does when he does that.

"Dr. Quinzel! It's _so_ good to have you back doc. I've _missed_ you."

"Have you now…" I say absentmindedly and take my seat across from him. I fumble with the papers in front of me and get myself in order. "How have you been feeling?"

"Oh, I've been doing alright since our last little-" he coughs. " _session._ " I can hear him grin but I'm too busy preoccupying myself with my papers to look up and verify. "And how have you been doctor?"

I pretend I didn't hear him ask that last question. "Then that means that you've been taking well to this medication and I won't change it." I jot down some notes on how his behavior has been good and his treatment is going well. "Have you had any overly violent thoughts recently?"

"No more than usual." I imagine he shrugged here. "I'll tell ya this though, Ha _rleen_ : I've been thinking _a lot_ about you."

Once again, I pretend not to hear the last thing he said. "Good. As long as those violent thoughts aren't increasing in frequency, then I'll say we've made some progress." I jot down some more notes about his improvement.

Almost like a shift in the atmosphere, I can literally feel his smile drop completely. He bangs the table roughly with both closed fists and I jump but I carry on with my writing. "HEY! LOOK. AT. ME." He says in a harsh voice and I have to oblige. I haven't looked at him since I walked in. When my eyes reluctantly meet his, I'm faced with all of the anger, sadness, and fear that I thought were gone. I'm reminded of everything that he's done and everything that he's capable of doing. When I look into those blue orbs all I see is red. A very vivid image of Guy decorated in blood comes to mind. I break away from his gaze immediately, knowing that he read each and every one of my emotions in the short time our eyes locked.

Looking down, I realize that tears have immediately begun to formulate. I shake my head disapprovingly. "I can't do this." I say to myself. "I just can't do this."

I sloppily group my papers up in one sweep and rise from my chair. As I'm going towards the door the Joker speaks to me in that same harsh manner. "Harleen. DON'T." My stride doesn't falter and I shut the door completely behind me.

Jerry and Lyle look surprised to see me so soon. Before they can say anything, I look to Jerry and give him a weak smile. "Thanks for the advice Jer. I think I'm going to take it." I rub away a stray tear that had managed to fall and walk away from the two without looking back.

Jerry manages to throw in a "Good for you Quinzel," before I'm out of earshot.

I take the elevator up from max and the slow ascension gives me time to pull myself together. I fan at my face with my free hand, trying to dry up the water in eyes. I take deep calming breaths and bring myself back to normal.

Those few seconds of eye contact were too intense. I thought I didn't feel anything for him anymore. But turns out, I feel too _much_ for him. All this time I must have been suppressing all of that in. I can't do that again. I don't want to face _that_ again.

When the elevator sounds, I step out and start walking directly towards Dr. Arkham's office. I have to go up a flight of stairs and maneuver through that oh so familiar maze of hallways, but I finally get there. I knock three times on the door and wait for him to say, "Come in." I open the door and step inside. His face lights up when he recognizes me. "Ah, Dr. Quinzel welcome back. I've been meaning to stop by your office today. You have my condolences, I'm sorry for your loss."

"Thank you."

"Now tell me," He gestures for me take a seat at the other side of his desk. "What brings you here today?"

I let out an exaggerated breath. "Look, there's no easy way for me to say this so I'm just going to get right to the point, okay?" He nods in agreement and urges me to go on with the flick of his hand. "I can't treat the Joker anymore."

His face drops completely. "What?"

"I'm sorry Dr. Arkham. I just can't do it anymore. I need you to assign me someone else to treat because I can't treat him anymore."

He's a bit at a loss for words. I guess I really caught him off guard. "I- I don't understand. Did something happen? Why are you doing this?"

"I just simply can't take him on as a patient anymore. He makes me too uncomfortable."

"Harleen. You're the only doctor who has ever made it this far with him. You've been his doctor for months. Are you sure you want to throw away all of the progress you've made? Are you sure you can't get past whatever it is you're going through?"

"Oh I'm more than sure that I can't do this anymore. I know that this is troubling for you because the board was finally at ease with how things were going with him."

Dr. Arkham sighs resignedly. "They were. They won't take this news lightly."

There's a brief pause between us before I speak again. "You know, I've heard through the grapevine that there have been doctors from all over contacting you so that they can take over my job. Is that true?"

"Yes, it's true." He shrugs. "Apparently they feel that you may have gotten him past a psychological hurdle that was preventing him from accepting any treatment. Now that he's past it, they want a chance to take the treatment further."

"Perfect. Then you'll have no trouble at all getting him a new doctor, right?"

"No, not at all. I can have someone step in tomorrow if I want. But, I want to make sure that you know what you're doing. The Joker is a big deal. His case is wanted by many. Giving him up means giving up on a huge opportunity for you in your career. Is that what you want?"

"Yes. I don't mind passing up this great… _opportunity_."

"Well alright. If you're sure that that's what you want to do, I will honor your request."

I place a hand over my heart and sigh in relief. "Thank you. You have no idea how good it feels to hear that."

Dr. Arkham smiles in return. "I'll have someone come in tomorrow to take over the Joker's therapy. I'll also have the files for your new patients on your desk by tomorrow morning. Since you're not handling the Joker anymore, I trust that you can take on three patients at a time."

"Of course I can. Thank you so much for this Dr. Arkham." I get up to leave and close the door to his office behind me. I do feel a bit guilty about all of this but my relief greatly outweighs everything else. I feel like the weight of the world has been lifted off of my shoulders. I'm so happy, I could skip. I never have to see the Joker ever again!

* * *

Another day, another dollar. Getting up this morning was way easier today than it was yesterday. I'm actually looking forward to the rest of my day. Having new patients is exciting. Treating more than one patient at a time is exciting; that way my thoughts aren't consumed by one person. I wonder who I'm going to get. I kind of hope that they're hard-core cases. Given my experience, I think I'm good with edgy people. Plus, they're more exciting. When I interned back at Blackgate Prison, I dealt with edgy guys all of the time. I loved it.

It just feels so _nice_ being able to look forward to going to work again. I miss having this excitement in the morning. I am in such a good mood that I decide to wear my hair down today and even bother to put on some make-up. A bit of dark brown eyeshadow, some black eyeliner, some pale pink blush, and what I like to call my signature red lipstick… well it used to be anyway; I'm bringing it back! I even decided to wear my red hip slim pencil dress today. I stand in front of the mirror to smooth out any creases that I can. Red really is my color…

I toss my white doctor coat over, grab my little black purse, and I'm ready to go. Now I look as good as I feel. Today really feels like the beginning of a new, healthy chapter in my life. Stepping outside, even the day feels so new and clean. I love it.

I toss my purse to the passenger seat, rev up the car, and head for the asylum. With moderate traffic, it takes me a bit under thirty minutes to get there.

At the front desk, I recognize Tasia and flash her a grin. "Good morning."

Tasia beams in return. "Hey Dr. Quinzel! I heard you were back. It's good to see you."

"Thanks. And please, if I get to call you Tasia it's only fair that you get to call me Harleen, right?"

"You know what; yes it is. Thanks Harleen. And hey- I'm going to let you know right now that there's donuts in the lounge."

"What? Who brought donuts? No one ever treats anyone to anything around here."

Tasia laughs, "That's because the person who brought it isn't from here. It was the new doctor."

My face contorts into that of confusion for a second until realization hits me in my stupid face. "Oh! The new doctor for the Joker right?"

"Yes. And she seems real nice. I hope she makes it." Tasia looks extremely hopeful but something in her eyes gives me the impression that she's already declared the new doctor to be doomed.

And wait a minute! She said _she_ didn't she? _She seems real nice._ That's what she said right? The hand that isn't clutching my purse automatically goes to my hip. "So it's a _she_ huh?"

"Oh yes," Tasia nods enthusiastically. "And she was really nice. She handed me a donut as soon as she walked in. She told me to tell the rest of the staff to stop by the lounge and grab one. That's so nice of her. She seems like a great person. I'm looking forward to getting to know her. She's very pretty too. Pretty doctors are hard to come by... I mean, you're very pretty too Harleen. It's amazing how many pretty doctors work at this place."

When she finally stopped ranting I placed both of my elbows on her desk and supported my head with both hands under my cheeks. I gave her my best Cheshire smile. "You sound like you have a crush."

Tasia's face turns immediately into one of fright. "What?! No I don't."

I stay the way I am; smiling at her, not saying anything. I'm clearly making her uncomfortable and she does tell me to _quit it,_ so I back away from the desk. But, the smile never leaves my face. The poor kid is blushing brighter than a tomato. " _Okay_ … I think I'll go meet this new doctor and see what all the fuss is about." I start walking away but turn to give her one last piece of advice before leaving. "You gotta work on that blushing thing that you do girl. It gives you away. You're brighter than my holiday lights on Christmas." Before I turn back to walk away, I see her pull out a compact and gasp at her reflection.

Hmm… A female doctor huh? I can't say I'm too surprised. I'm most definitely not the first female doctor he's had, but I am the youngest. Looking at this from Dr. Arkham's perspective, if a young female doctor worked so well the first time, why not hire another? I bet she's my age, if not younger. And of course, she must be beautiful. Though I'll admit, if she's blonde I just might blow my stack because that would be too fuckin' obvious.

I turn the corner and finally arrive at the staff lounge. There's more people here than there usually is at this time. Must be the donuts.

Of course, that beautiful, oh-so-familiar scent of coffee catches my attention first before anything else. The temptation is too much and I move to pour myself a cup before I can talk myself out of it. When I have what I want, I move to the side and lean against the counter casually. I should have stopped by my office first to drop off my purse, now I'm stuck carrying it.

I sip into my cup and discreetly scope out the room. I suppose the new doctor is at the center of the cluster of nurses flocked together in the corner of the room. I also suspect that that is where the donuts are at. Using the excuse of grabbing one, I nudge my way through the nurses to find the boxes of donuts laid out on the tables in the corner. I grab myself a strawberry frosted and bite into it, looking to my right to find a face I've never seen before. A beautiful woman with curly auburn hair and hazel eyes enraptures her listeners with whatever it is that she's saying. She looks to be somewhere between her mid-thirties or possibly even her early-forties. A moment after I notice her, she notices me. The nurses around her point to me and all exclaim, "that's her!" She turns to me and her eyes widen with realization and a huge smile spreads across her face. She approaches me instantly extending her hand forward for me to shake. "Hi! You must be Dr. Harleen Quinzel. My name is Dr. Daria Greene, it's so nice to meet you."

I take her hand and she shakes mine firmly and a bit enthusiastically. "Hi, nice to meet you. I take it your patient 4479's new doctor?"

She smiles proudly and nods. "Yes ma'am, that's me. When Dr. Arkham called I dropped everything to be here as fast as I could."

"Well, congratulations to you for getting the job and coming in the next day. Your enthusiasm is admirable." …And it won't last long either. That guy is not easy to work with, lady. You'll find out soon enough. Even before he did what he did, the Joker has always been a _huge_ headache.

"Thank you." I move to walk away but Dr. Greene gently grabs me by my arm to stop me. "Um, actually Dr. Quinzel, I was hoping you and I could talk for a bit so that you can brief me on patient 4479. I read all of your submitted progress reports but I would so very much appreciate a one-on-one with you about your experience."

She wants to hear what I have to say about my experience? I suppose it is plausible to hear direct information straight from the horse's mouth. To be honest, I left out a _ton_ of things from those progress reports so of course all of the information she would need, I have in my head. The question is, do I really want her to have that information? Do I want her to succeed in this? I suppose if I really want to move on with my life, than I have to pass all of this information along to the next person so I don't have to be involved with him anymore. I wouldn't want Dr. Arkham to come running to me if this woman can't do the job. So I guess it benefits me to tell her what I can about the Joker. Of course, I'm leaving out the soulmate thing. God knows I don't want _anyone_ to know about that…

I smile at Dr. Greene assuredly. "Of course. I'd be more than happy to brief you on anything and everything. As a matter of fact, I have some personal notes up in my office that I think would be a great help to you."

Dr. Greene looks overcome with relief. "Oh, thank you so much! That would be _beyond_ helpful. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Would you like to accompany me to my office now?"

"Yes please. Lead the way." She gestures for me to walk ahead. It occurs to me that she's new to the building and probably has no idea where anything is.

When we start our walk through the maze of hallways, I take the time to point out where every room of interest is. I also point out the best routes to get to different areas of the facility. I tell her which elevators are fast and which are slow, what times it's best to visit certain staff areas, and which places she should honestly just stay away from. By the time we reach my office, I've already loaded the doctor up with tons of good info.

I unlock my door and gesture for the woman to step inside. She takes a seat and I hang my purse up and take my rightful seat behind my desk. To be honest, I could care less whether or not she knows where everything is in the building. I was just saying all of that crap so I could delay talking about the person whom I'm choosing not to think about anymore. But the time has come to pass the torch, so let's just get this over with. I fold my hands over my desk and smile playfully at her. "So, let's get down to the nitty-gritty shall we? What do you want to know?"

The doctor crosses her legs and straightens up at attention. "Oh, where do I begin? I guess my first question would have to be… How did you do it? How did you get the Joker to open up to you?"

I laugh quietly to myself, thinking back on some rather frustrating sessions that I had with that clown. I remember trying to get information out of him was like pulling teeth! He never told me a thing about himself. Well… never anything that I wanted to hear. I remember one time, I wanted to know one simple little thing about him, so, I asked him what his favorite color was. He responded with, " _Why the color of your eyes doc. They're so cute, I'd love to pop them out and carry them in my pocket so I can look at them whenever I want."_ Who the hell says that? I'll admit, it was a bit flattering but strange nonetheless.

I realize that I'm reminiscing longer than I should and bring my full attention back to Dr. Greene. "Well, to be honest. I never was able to get him to open up to me. As you've read the progress reports, I'm sure you've noticed that I was never able to obtain any of the Joker's personal information. The man is an enigma, and I'm warning you that he's intent on remaining so. But I'll tell you this: although he never told me anything about himself, he did share with me many of his beliefs, theories, and views on the world and life. He could go on for hours talking about the different kinds of people there are in life. In his mind, he characterizes different people into strict categories based on their actions alone. He's exceedingly perceptive and to tell you the truth, not everything he says sounds so farfetched. But don't let him know that you think that. You'll fuel his ego and I swear, you'll never hear the end of it. Trust me."

At some point, Dr. Greene had leaned over with her elbow on my desk and her fist propped under her chin. She listened intently to everything I said. I felt like I could literally see the information being absorbed through her eyes. The woman was so amazed at what I was saying. " _Wow_ … You seem to have gotten really close to him. You may not know any of his personal information, but you've gotten to know his character, his nature. It seems like you even know the way he thinks!"

I wave away the notion. "I don't think anyone could ever know what goes on in that head of his. But I suppose spending as much time with him that I did, I was able to pick up on how he would react to certain things. But his reactions are as unpredictable as his thought process too so…" I shrug my shoulders. "There really is no way of knowing anything with certainty when it comes to this man."

Dr. Greene shakes her head in astonishment and then eagerly moves on to her next inquiry. "Okay, so, I'm not surprised to hear that patient 4479 is difficult to study. I've done my research and it seems like he's a difficult man to categorize, given how many completely different diagnostics he's had over the years. But that was just stuff I read on paper. It's so extraordinarily amazing to hear an actual account of his character straight from the mouth of the person who got the closest; lasted the longest! So, what I want to know is how did you manage to have him allow you to treat him for so long? No doctor has ever lasted as long as you have. No one's even come close. I'd like to know what I can do to last at least half as long as you have."

"Hmm…" I tap my bottom lip pensively. I'm trying to remember if there was anything I ever really did for him to continue wanting to have therapy sessions with me. To be honest, nothing really comes to mind… "I'm not quite sure why the Joker allowed me to continue our therapy sessions. I never particularly did anything that I can say would be the reason why he was so interested in continuing to see me. But given the Joker's history, I think it's safe to assume that he'll let you know on your very first session whether he would like to continue having therapy with you or not. I remember my first session with him. He told me that same day that he was willing to see me again. And other doctors before me knew his feelings about themselves quite clearly after their first sessions too…" More than half of them were killed on their first day…

I can see that Dr. Greene understands what I'm saying and the discouragement is slowly starting to show on her face. I can't have that. I'm not going to let her feel down before she's even tried. I really need this to work out for her! I have a feeling that if it doesn't, Dr. Arkham is going to send me back to him, and I can't do that. "Don't get discouraged if your session doesn't start out great. Mine certainly didn't. When I began the session, he would _not_ stop staring at me. He wore this blatant, intense expression; it terrified me! And I had to pretend like it didn't bother me at all when really, I was a nervous wreck on the inside. What made matters worse was that he didn't speak to me for practically the entire session."

Dr. Greene's eyes widen in shock. "Really?"

I nod, sighing in remembrance of that day. "Yeah. It was really awful. I was so uncomfortable. He wasn't answering any of my questions or comments. I didn't know what to do. It wasn't until near the end of the session where he finally spoke up and told me that he was willing to work with me. So, I guess what I'm saying here is: If your session seems like it isn't going great, don't let that bother you or deter you. The Joker can flip like the switch of light at any moment. He might try to make you feel uncomfortable just to see how you handle it. If you do good under pressure, then I'm sure he'd be willing to see you again. Just don't let the first impression fool you. He may act one way, but he does it so that you don't see the direction he's heading. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

Dr. Greene is quiet for a moment but she eventually slowly nods her head in agreement. "I actually think that I completely understand what you're saying. Thank you for the advice. I'm definitely going to bear in mind everything that you just said."

"Good."

"And…" Dr. Greene starts hesitantly. "There is one last thing that I'm curious about."

"Sure, what's on your mind?"

"I don't understand why you suddenly stopped treating him. Dr. Arkham didn't seem to know why either. At first when I got the news that the position had opened up, I assumed that something terrible had happened to you but Dr. Arkham assured me otherwise. And you do seem fine. So why did you stop?"

Hmm, how do I explain this? I obviously have to lie about it. "I suppose you could say that I felt trapped."

Dr. Greene looks confused. "Trapped? How?"

"Well… I didn't feel we were going anywhere. For a while, we weren't making any progress and I suddenly got the feeling that I had taken him as far as I could. I felt that I was incapable of helping him any further so it would only be appropriate for someone else to step in and take the reins; Take his treatment further than I could. That's why I'm very hopeful that you're that person Dr. Greene. I sincerely hope that you can do what I couldn't."

She smiles at my sincerity. "Well I certainly hope I can too. I'm going to try my hardest."

I turn in my seat to reach into one of my desk drawers to pull out my stack of notes. "Before I forget, let me give you what notes I can. I really hope that they help."

"Oh, I'm sure that they will. This conversation alone has done wonders. I can only imagine what insight your notes will offer."

I put the stack of notes in my lap and flip through them. I can't hand her the entire stack. I doodled in a lot of them. How embarrassing and dangerous would that be if she saw my H + J encased in a heart doodle? All of the notes that are doodle free are placed on the desk. The _others_ go back in my drawer.

Let's see… That one's safe. And that one's safe. That one is too. Oops. This one isn't. It has a tiny sketch of Mr. J in a tuxedo on the corner of it. I'm not half bad. I need to make a mental note to tap more into this side of me. I should start picking up more hobbies to keep me busy at home. Why not drawing?

When I've got them all sorted out I push the stack on my desk towards her and I shut my desk drawer closed. I'll burn the others later.

Dr. Greene shuffles through them carefully. Her eyes scan and examine as much as they can between each page that she turns. After a while she finally looks up at me. "Thank you so much for these Dr. Quinzel. I could never thank you enough for how helpful you've been."

"It's no trouble at all. Please feel free to come to me for anything, anytime."

Dr. Greene stands and courtesy dictates that I do the same. She extends her hand to me and I take it. She gives me one good shake before letting go. "Thanks for everything. I'm going to go read these as fast as I can before my session starts. I've only got an hour left."

"Oh of course. Go study." I gesture her towards the door and I sit myself back down. Before she completely leaves my office, I remember to wish her well. "Good luck down there Dr. Greene." She smiles at me before closing the door behind her.

She really does seem like a really nice woman. Maybe Mr. J will take a liking to her… I ignore the pang in my chest at that thought. Despite everything, that bastard can still make me feel a certain way.

Dr. Greene is unsurprisingly beautiful. I was expecting that. What I wasn't expecting was that she would be noticeably older than me. I had seriously thought that Dr. Arkham would hire someone as young as me, but I suppose since in the end, I didn't really work out, he figured he should hire someone with more experience. It makes sense. Take the beautiful woman element, but find it in someone with more experience and expertise. I can see why he thought she was the perfect choice. Let's hope she makes it. It would give me such peace of mind knowing that the Joker is getting the help that he needs. Because God knows that he needs it…

During my conversation with Dr. Greene, I noticed that there was a huge brown envelope sitting in my metal basket at the corner of my desk. This must have my new patients' info in it. I've been looking forward to opening this. I grab the envelope and open it as quickly as I can. Three patient files fall into my hands. The first is named Julian Gregory Day. It seems that he has an obsession with holidays, weekdays, seasons, and anniversaries. He has a history of doing themed crimes tied to specific days. He has a high intelligence and is a well renowned inventor in his own right. He's in his mid-forties and has a head as bald as a baby's bottom. At least he did when he took this patient registration photo. Who knows if he was shaving his head on purpose. Some guys do that…

The second patient is named Arnold Wesker, a man born into a long dead mafia family. He's developed a dissociative identity disorder in which he personifies a 1920's gangster through a dummy modeled after Al Capone. He's conducted several successful armed robberies and is a skilled criminal strategist. Makes sense given the family that he was born into. …And he's another baldy… He's got some hair on the sides of his head but just barely; he's in his early fifties. Am I detecting a pattern here? I bet the last patient is an old baldy too…

Oh no, I was wrong. This guy is in his early thirties. His name is Edward Nigma. Now this man has a _really_ high intelligence. He's obsessed with riddles, puzzles, and word games. According to this, he suffers from delusions of grandeur and is very flamboyant and ostentatious. He's skilled with engineering and technology. He also has applaudable investigative skills. Geez, this guy sounds intimidating. But I've already dealt with the baddest of the bad, so this guy should be a piece of cake compared to who I was working with. In his photo, he has green eyes and a head full of brown hair. It's not that I have a thing against bald guys. I just thought that I was sensing a pattern and I was about to get really mad at Dr. Arkham because I would've known what he was he doing if what I thought I sensed was true. Luckily it wasn't, so I'm taking my suspicions back.

It seems that Dr. Arkham is pretty confident in me after all. None of these patients are being held in the minimum-security ward. That means that Dr. Arkham trusts me with hard-core patients. Mr. Day and Mr. Wesker are both being held in the co-ed ward. There's a good amount of security there but it's _nothing_ compared to max. As a matter of fact, it seems that Mr. Nigma is being kept down in maximum-security. I'm glad that I got a high-profile patient but to be honest, I was kind of hoping to stay away from that ward for a while… But it's fine. I can be professional. Besides, it's not like I'm just going to bump into him one day. They keep the Joker in the isolation section of the ward. Mr. Nigma isn't being held on that side of maximum.

Now I'm not going to have any sessions with them today or anything, but I would like to stop by their cells and introduce myself if I can. But before that, I have three whole sets of paperwork that I'm going to have to fill out before I'm even allowed to interact with them. _Aaaaand_ I don't see that any of that paperwork was left here on my desk so I'm going to have to run to several different offices to pick up what I need and then spend several hours here at my desk filling them out.

* * *

It took me thirty minutes to gather all of the paperwork that I needed and I'm currently two hours in in filling them out. I've finished filling out everything regarding Mr. Day, and I'd like to say that I'm almost done filling out everything for Arnold Wesker too but… There's still a good amount of paper left. And don't get me started on Nigma's paperwork; he has the most, being a maximum security patient and all…

I don't think I'm going to be able to visit all of these guys today. I have too much to do here. Although once I turn in Mr. Day's paperwork, I'll be all clear to go see him. But, I think I'd rather wait and get everybody's paperwork done today, that way I can just get it all out of the way. I guess I'll visit them all tomorrow and then-

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAAHEEEEEHAHAHAHAHA!_**

I freeze immediately and listen to the laughter as it passes. I look up at the clock and notice that the Joker should be well into his first session with Dr. Greene. I wonder if that means it's going well… I can't help but slump in my seat. Good for her, I guess…

I go back to writing, albeit slower than I was before.

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAHAHHAAAHA!_**

Jeez, shut up- I get it okay? You're having such a wonderful time with your new doctor. I don't care! Keep it down and leave me alone.

 ** _HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!_**

That son of a- I'm never going to get any work done like this…

 ** _DR. QUINZEL~ DID YOU REALLY THINK YOU WERE GOING TO GET RID OF ME THAT EASILY?_**

WHAT THE HELL? Did I just hear him say a perfect sentence?! I pause waiting to hear more but I get nothing. Suddenly I get the feeling that he's waiting for a response, so I think of one.

 _I'm not trying to get rid of you, I just don't want to be anywhere near you._

There's nothing but silence for a while and suddenly I feel dumb for trying to communicate with him. It must've been dumb luck that I was able to hear him so clearly. He and I have never had a strong connection so it was stupid of me for thinking that I could actually get in touch with him now when things are so bad between us. I go back to filling out my paperwork when I freeze again at the sound of his voice.

 ** _YOU MADE A BIG MISTAKE KIDDO. NOBODY TURNS THEIR BACK ON ME AND GETS AWAY WITH IT._**

I take a moment to respond. I can't believe this is happening right now.

 _What're you going to do? You gonna kill me Mr. J?_

 ** _THAT WOULD BE SO EASY, WOULDN'T IT? I HAVE SOMETHING BETTER PLANNED FOR YOU._**

A cold chill runs up my spine.

 _Oh yeah?_

 ** _ARE YOU UP FOR A LITTLE GAME HARLEEN?_**

I lean back in my chair, smirking at his absurdness.

 _Of course not, but it's not like I have a choice right? So, what did you have in mind?_

 _ **ATTA GIRL! COME ON DOWN AND I'LL SHOW YA.**_

I look up at the clock and bite my bottom lip. Dr. Greene is still supposed to be with him. I hope she's okay… Hopefully, he's thinking about all this while he's in his session. If I think this way, then I'm okay with going down to maximum to see how things are going. I'll just pop my head in and won't even be seen. If he's alone… I'm coming right back up and calling security.

I have a really bad feeling about his though… I should just stay here and work, but… as always, my curiosity is getting the best of me and I can't ignore it. I gotta go down and take a quick peek; see what he's up to. It's gonna be no good, that's for sure. But it's good to know that security is top notch down there so how much trouble could he really stir up?

With that, I get up and leave my office and head down to maximum security.

* * *

I step out of the elevator and walk down the familiar hallway. Instead of going towards the maximum security gate, instinct tells my feet to go the opposite direction towards our old therapy room. When I get there, I don't see Lyle or Jerry waiting around anywhere, but the lights in the room are on, so I approach. When I get closer, I notice faint red footsteps on the floor that indicate someone exiting the room in a hurry. A cold chill runs up my spine. This has happened before… with Guy… He's making me relive it! I know what's waiting on the other side of that door, I've seen this before…

Anyone else would have walked away, but I just couldn't. I have to keep going. If he wants to put me through this again, then so be it. I'll take anything he throws at me head on. If he thinks he's going to break me again, he is _horribly_ mistaken.

When I open the door, I see exactly what I was expecting to see. Dr. Greene's mutilated and bloody body rests in a corner of the room. The table and chair were thrown to the side during the confrontation. Dr. Greene's Auburn hair covers her face, for which I'm grateful. Her hair looks matted in some parts; he must have been dragging her from her hair. The blood trails blend in smoothly with her auburn locks but the stains decorating her white coat do so rather grotesquely. There's bloody footprints all over the room. Not to mention a pool of it blooming around the doctor's head. You can tell he dragged her to that corner by the trail left beneath her legs. And of course, the most obvious thing in the room is the message he left for me. In big red letters on the wall above the deceased doctor, he wrote: HIDE AND SEEK.

Just as I finish reading it, the power goes out. Not just in this room, the hallway goes black too. I start panicking but after a minute, the backup generator kicks in and the emergency lights go on. These lights are even worse than the usual ones (as if that were possible..). They're extremely dim, red-lit lights. They don't offer much comfort. Sure, I can see everything again, but now everything that I see is obscurely red. How will I know what red is real and what red is only red because of the lights?

After another five minutes, a loud blaring signal starts blasting from the hallway repeatedly. It's so loud and obnoxious and annoying. Thinking back on a certain protocol that I was briefed on, when that siren rings, it's supposed to signal a code red violation and the entire facility is supposed to go on lock-down. Well… with these fuckin' lights, code red seems right to me.

I turn to leave the room but bump into someone when I open the door. I didn't hear him coming on account of the loud ass blaring siren. I find that it's Lyle, looking scared out of his mind. With the door open, the sound of the alarm is much, much louder. I try to scream over it to communicate with Lyle.

"DO YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON?!"

Lyle cups his ear. "WHAT?!"

"I SAID, DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!"

Lyle pushes me in the room and follows, closing the door behind him. "What did you say?"

I sigh and drop my hands dramatically. "I said, what the hell is going on?"

Lyle suddenly looks very grim and he looks me in the eye and says, "The inmates have taken over the asylum."

My eyes widen and I freeze, feeling every muscle in my body tighten with fear.

 _Oh. Shit…_

 _ **HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!**_

* * *

 **AN: Hey guys! I hope everyone spent their holidays well; I know I did. I've just been chilling this whole vacation and I love it! I'm always on my feet so this is a nice change.**

 **I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, it's the longest one yet!**

 **Thank you to everyone who reviews, I enjoy reading them so much, they're such a treat to me.**

 **Thanks for sticking with the story thus far and I hope to see you all in the next chapter! Peace.**


	19. The Game

**Chapter Nineteen:**

 **The Game**

I did not see this coming. I didn't see _any_ of this coming. If I would have known the Joker was going to react in so big of a way, I would have handled things with him _much_ differently. I probably should have talked to him like an adult and tried to make him understand how I was feeling. But I mean, come on! He had to have known that after he did what he did, things couldn't just go back to normal. He had to have known that, anyone else would. So, I'm not quite understanding this huge overreaction that he's having; but I'm done trying to understand him. That passed the moment I decided not to be his doctor anymore. All I know now is that I've got to get out of here!

Lyle is in the corner of the room furthest from Dr. Greene's corpse. He's lurched over vomiting his guts out.

The alarm is still blaring out obnoxiously in the hallway and the lights are still out. I hope that the power comes back on soon because the red back-up lights don't do anything to help the situation. They make this whole ordeal that much creepier.

While Lyle pukes out his lunch, I start thinking about how I wish I could see the Joker to tell him to stop all of this madness. In my gut, I know that a lot of people are going to get hurt and I'd like to stop it if I can. But the other part of me -which is a much larger part of me, might I add- just wants to get myself out of the building and to safety. And as much as I would love to be a hero, I think I'm just going to save my own skin here. I have a feeling that finding the Joker is the _last_ thing that I want to do right now; it wouldn't end well.

But wait a minute! I have this new connection with him now, don't I? Maybe I could try communicating with him again and talk him out of this? If it still works. _And_ , if he bothers to listen to me- I mean, _truly_ listen to me. He usually never does…

 _Joker, what've you done?_

It takes a moment for him to respond. I thought it wouldn't work anymore but I'm surprised to feel the relief that washes over me when it does.

 ** _Oh, have you seen my latest work? It's nice right?_**

 _Why?_

 _**For you, my dear. I told you we were going to play a game, didn't I?**_

 _This is far from what I had in mind…_

 _**Go big or go home, I like to say.**_

I roll my eyes, annoyed at how laid back he's being. There's no way he's going to listen to me if I try reasoning with him. I can hear the condescendence oozing from his voice. I'm seriously not even going to bother.

 _So, hide and seek huh? That's what you want to play? Because I'm warning you now, you're not going to find me._

I can easily imagine him straightening up at attention with that gleam in his eyes that he gets when he's being challenged.

 ** _Oh really? You wanna bet?_**

 _A bet?_ Sounds dangerous… But for some odd reason, I feel the impulse to humor him. _Hmmm… Alright Mr. J, it's a bet. What do I get when I win?_

 _**HAHAHAHAHAHA! When you win? Oh doctor, this is fun already. Let's see… If you win… you get what you want. You know what that is.**_

He'd actually leave me alone if I win? Just like that?

 ** _If I win… I get what I want._**

 _...And what's that Mr. J?_

There's a long drawn out pause.

 ** _Lose and you'll find out._**

I roll my eyes to recover from the chill that traveled up my spine; even though I know full well that he can't see me right now.

At this time, Lyle has finally finished retching and was wiping his mouth clean with the bottom of his shirt. He looks over at Dr. Greene's corpse regretfully. "That is so fucked up. I need to get out of here…"

"Same." I interject. "The sooner the better. But let's not be too hasty either, we have to keep our wits about us. We can't just go out there willy nilly. You said the patients have taken over, right?"

Lyle doesn't look at me when he speaks because I guess in his line of sight, I must be standing in the same view as Dr. Greene. He cups his hand over his eyes and looks to the ground. "Yeah. They're out of their cells- most of 'em. Some of the hard-core ones are loose though."

"Okay, so we have to be _really_ careful and avoid as many of them as we can. I'm not as familiar with the ward as you are but I think emergency stairs are on the other side of the hall, right?" He nods. "Then we should make our way there now."

Lyle looks confused. "Why the stairs?"

"Well the elevators are really slow and really loud. I might be overly cautious right now but, I can't shake the feeling that we'd be sitting ducks in an elevator."

Lyle still looks confused. "I don't get that…"

I roll my eyes. "You know what, I don't either, but I've got a gut feeling about it, so I'm going to go with it and you should too. Always trust a woman's intuition."

He shrugs. "Why not? You're a doctor so I'm trusting that you're smart."

I suppress a pang of annoyance. "Alright, what sort of protection do you have on you?"

"Uh, let's see…" Lyle fumbles with something at his waist but I can't exactly see because his shirt is untucked and blocks my view. His shoulders sag and then his eyes meet mine. "I _had_ a small taser but I left it in the lounge…"

I sigh resignedly, "Of course you did…" I say more to myself. "Oh well. We're just going to have to get through this using our own brawn if it comes down to it."

Lyle visibly gulps. While he mentally prepares himself to go, I physically prepare myself. I tie my hair in a low ponytail and roll my coat sleeves up to my elbow. This may be a game to the Joker, but _I_ ain't playing. I'm getting out of here as fast as I can. I look to Lyle when I'm finished and ask him if he's ready to go. He nods and follows close behind me. Before I open the door, I'm halted by the tug of fabric at my shoulder. "Wait. What about her?" He nods in Dr. Greene's direction but doesn't exactly look at her.

I furrow my eyebrows, more in annoyance than confusion. "What _about_ her? What- You don't want to leave her for dead? News flash: That ship has sailed." I roll my eyes before opening the door. The siren's blare immediately becomes unmuted the moment the door opens. I hesitate a bit when entering the hallway and it seems that Lyle does too. He's sticking _real_ close to me and I have to say, these new colors he's sporting are _not_ flattering. He's totally letting me take the lead, even though he's trying to be subtle about it. He should be the one escorting me through all of this.

Halfway down the hall, the siren stops blaring. I'm relieved but the feeling is short lived by the sound of voices coming from around the corner. Lyle and I stop immediately at the sound of the commotion and we exchange a quick look before we slowly start to continue forward. Unfortunately, without the siren, every sound made is amplified by the echo effect of the empty hallway. About three steps in, Lyle turns sharply to me and practically glares at me while pointing down to my feet. My heels are clacking loudly with every step I take. Whoever is around the corner heard my steps because they immediately got quiet and one of them said, "Did you hear that?"

I quickly and quietly slip out of my heels and carry them in hand while Lyle looks around like a mad man trying to find a hiding spot. He finally settles on a thin little door camouflaged with the wall by the same coat of paint. He opens the door and grabs me by my free hand, pulling me painfully into the room with him; he practically yanked me in there. I came crashing into his chest with such a force, I would have yelled at him if we were in a different circumstance. Instead, all I did was gasp out loudly by the sudden tug.

Once I'm flush against his chest, Lyle quickly closes the door. I want to move away from him and get out of this awkward position but, there's nowhere else to go. We're in a tiny broom closet that wasn't even meant to house one person in it, let alone two…

We quiet our breathing to listen to the sounds on the other side of the door. Footsteps approach from the direction of the commotion that we had heard earlier. When the footsteps sound closer, one man says, "I thought I heard something…" "Maybe down the hall?" Another suggests. The sound of the footsteps quickly becomes faint until they can't be heard anymore. Guy releases a breath he had been holding in and opens the door. I step out quickly and adjust the bottom of my pencil dress for no real reason; just trying to make myself feel decent I guess. Being pressed up against Lyle did not feel right.

Now that he knows that the coast is clear, the wanna-play-tough-guy finally decides to take charge and ushers me around the corner of the hallway. When he reaches the door to the stairs, he places his hand on the push plate and gestures me over with a wave of the other. I approach and he only manages to push the door slightly ajar before he closes it again silently. He looks back at me and I shoot him a confused expression. Lyle taps his index finger to his lips and mouths, "listen." He gestures me closer and pushes the door open ever so slightly. I can hear voices mingling from somewhere above. People are in there, and that means that this passage isn't safe for us. I close the door quickly and look at Lyle irritably. I whisper, "Now what?"

He thinks for a moment and then his eyes light up with an answer. "Well, there's another stair case but it's all the way on the other side of the ward." He looks apologetic.

"Well, looks like we don't really have much of choice. Let's hope the other stairs are empty." Lyle nods in agreement and we back away quickly from the door and down another hallway.

It's eerily quiet here. I've still got my heels in hand and Lyle and I don't dare to say a thing that we don't have to. We're being very cautious. We both know what'll happen to us if we get caught. This isn't the first inmate takeover to happen at Arkham; by far… Everybody knows what happens to doctors and orderlies who get caught. I bet it's a rat race upstairs for all of the employees trying to get out of this place. They all must have made it upstairs from down here because so far, we haven't run into anyone.

"Security breach in ward C. All units to ward C." The sudden sound of the speaker makes me jump. How come the speakers work but the lights don't? Hopefully they turn on soon because I really don't like these creepy red lights. I feel like I'm in a horror flick. Hell, with the situation we're in now, this probably would make for a good horror film. Let's hope I survive at the end.

 ** _Harleeeeeen. Harleeeeen. Come out, come out wherever you are~_**

Crap, I can't let him find me! What if he's still on this floor? It makes sense, he knows I'm here, right? After all, he knows that I started out down here. If I were him I'd be hunting down here for me too...

Damn, I've got to get upstairs A.S.A.P!

I charge ahead of Lyle and start running down each hall. Lyle keeps up with me to direct me to the correct paths to take each time we reach a fork in the road.

I can feel that we're getting close to the other stairs because we've been running for what feels like forever. When we turn down a different hallway, Lyle and I stop in our tracks immediately because of the sight we see before us. At the far end of the hall, we see five patients holding down a doctor and smashing his face in repeatedly with what looks like a fire extinguisher. I can't tell who the doctor is, his face is _beyond_ distinguishable. The inmates are holding him down roughly as if he's going to get up and fight back at any second; Not going to happen. He's gone. He's probably been gone for a while, but I'm not about to step in and tell them that. Neither is Lyle, apparently. Judging by the way he's tugging at my elbow and ushering me back the way we came.

When we're a ways away, we halt and he whispers to me, "Alright there's another way to those stairs but you're not going to like it."

"Uh oh, why?"

"Because we're going to have to cut through a cell unit."

"What!" I yell at him in whisper and slap his shoulder. "We can't go through a cell unit, they'll be all over the place!"

Lyle urges me to keep my whispers soft with a gesture of his hand. "Look, it shouldn't be so bad. Think about it; they're all out of their cells for the first time in forever. Do you really think that they'd be sticking around near 'em? Nah, they're all trying to get out of this hell hole just like we are. This is the only other way I know to get out of here. The least, we can do is pop our heads in and check if the coast is clear."

I cross my arms and pout. "Alright fine, you win. It makes sense when you put it like that. Let's go before I change my mind about this."

Man, I really wish I would have bothered to learn the lay out of this place beforehand. I never thought that I would necessarily need the information, but clearly, I do! This can't possibly be the only other route to the other stairs. I'm trusting Lyle on this because I have no other option, but I'm sure that there must be a way around the cell unit that'll get us back on track.

Before, we had stealthily avoided the maximum-security holding areas. Now, we're walking right up to one. This is just one of many of the cell units down here. The Joker wasn't held in this one. They kept him in the worst of the worst of them. The isolation cells. Terrible places to be imprisoned. If the people kept in them weren't already mad, it wouldn't take them long at all…

Walking up to the security gate, everything seems clear until we see a patient stumble out into the hallway. He's not facing our direction, but Lyle and I move towards the wall and press ourselves up to it. We're trying to be one with the wall so that we don't grab his attention. The area by the walls are also more dimly lit so that also helps.

Lyle taps my shoulder and when I look to him, he's mouthing something that I just can't catch. "What?" I mouth.

His lips move again but I don't know what words they're trying to make out. I shake my head at him not understanding. He rolls his eyes and starts making weird gestures with hands. There must be a question mark on my face because looking at him, I know he knows I don't know what the hell he's trying to say. His gestures get more frantic trying to quickly get me to understand.

I look back at the patient by the security gate and then back at Lyle. I point to the patient and Lyle nods his head frantically, thinking that I'm finally getting what he was trying to say. I look at the patient again and then give Lyle a single nod of affirmation. Staying pressed up against the wall, I start walking slowly towards the security gate. Trying to stay out of the inmate's line of sight. It takes a while to move slowly and silently, but eventually, I get within arms distance of the guy. He's standing there, whistling blissfully, as if he doesn't have a care in the world…

I can't take any chances though. I grip my heels in hand and thrash them as hard as I can against the back of his head. He stumbles and groans so I hit him again and again until he stays on the ground unmoving and quiet.

Lyle rushes up to me and yells at me in whisper. "What the hell did you do that for?!"

"I did what you told me to do!" I whisper yell back at him accusingly. "You wanted me to knock him out, didn't you?"

"No! I wanted us to sneak past him!"

"Then why the hell did you do this?" I ball one hand in a fist and punch the palm of my other hand barrel style.

"That's the signal for mission accomplished!"

"In what fuckin' language?! You should give a thumbs up or something. And mission accomplished? We didn't even start it yet and you were already signaling for it?"

Lyle starts repeating his gestures as he speaks to clarify what he was saying. "What I was saying earlier was that we need to stay against the wall… sneak past the inmate… and stay quiet… and alert. If we do that, then mission accomplished."

I slap him on the shoulder. "Where the fuck did you learn that? How the hell was I supposed to know what any of that meant?"

"Safety training. Don't doctors take it too?"

I roll my eyes. "Of course not, that's what you guys are for." I look at my heels in hand and they are completely useless now. The actual heel broke off on both shoes. "And look, thanks to your poor signaling now my favorite shoes are ruined." I toss them to the side next to the unconscious patient.

Lyle shrugs apologetically. "Well, you've been barefoot this whole time anyway; what's a little longer going to do to you?"

I huff and push past him going through the empty security gate. I say more to myself than to him, "Yeah well, you try running around barefoot on these disgusting floors and let's see how long you can take it…"

I hate to admit it, but Lyle was right about this ward. It's completely empty. Not a sound can be heard, which is creepy in itself, but, I'm going to take the silence as a good sign.

We walk past row after row of empty cells. My defenses are up like they've never been before. I've seen way too many scary movies. I feel like with each cell that we pass, someone might come out and jump-scare me. I wish I still had my heels… or at least some sort of blunt object. Every time we pass an open cell I cringe and unconsciously tug and squeeze on Lyle's shirt. Who is just as tense as I am, might I add… I give him props for being macho about it though. He's taking the lead here. I'm a little huddled into his side. If someone is going to try to surprise us, Lyle will see them first and that'll hopefully reduce the shock of surprise for me. That way I can react more rationally than I would if I was completely surprised by an unexpected appearance. I'm just trying to be practical, this has nothing to do with fear… heh.

The ward isn't very big, so we reach the security gate at the other end before we know it. Unfortunately, before we can pass through it, we hear footsteps shuffling quickly on the other side of the gate. They're getting louder, coming closer to us. I turn to Lyle, panic written all over my face. "What do we do?" I whisper.

"Let's hide in a cell."

"But there aren't many places to hide in them, they'll find us," I urge.

Lyle looks back at the other end of the ward. "Let's go back then."

"Okay," I consent. We can find another way through. Maybe the other hallway is empty now. We start running down the ward on tip-toe. Trying to be as fast and as quiet as possible. Our goal is to go back from whence we came before these other guys even know we were in here. It doesn't seem like a bad plan. The ward isn't long so we honestly thought that we could make it to the other end in time before the other guys entered at the other end. Unfortunately for us, we were wrong. As we're about to reach the other gate, we're stopped by a "Hey!"

Lyle and I both stop in our tracks and turn to look behind us. Five male patients start hustling over to us. I nudge Lyle's shoulder to get his attention. I was about to suggest that we run, but one of the inmates stopped me before I got the chance to.

"Not so fast little missy. Don't you say a word to 'im. My friends an' I are investigatin' you lot." Says who appears to be the leader of this posse. As he and the other men approach closer, I can start to make out their features. This guy for example, is missing several teeth, but I could have told you that even without looking at him. His S's come out in a sort of whistle every time he speaks it.

I decide to take on an authoritative approach and see if I can talk my way out of this. I'm a doctor after all -I've still got the jacket on- and they're just sick, sick people. "An investigation? Sir, if anyone here is going to conduct an investigation, it should be us. After all we work here and you… _lot..._ are out of your cells. Now why is that?"

"Hey!" Yells the hillbilly leader. "I'm the one askin' the questions here! An' if you don' comply… Jia here," He steps back to let a short Asian man step forward. To my horrid surprise, he's carrying a gun and pointing it right at us. "He'll tear you a new one."

Lyle's hands immediately go up in surrender. I quickly do the same, not really sure how to proceed now. They must have gotten that gun off of one of the few guards who are allowed to carry them. Despite how dangerous this situation is, I still want to play my role as doctor. "Look, we don't want any trouble, nor have we caused any. We just want to help you."

The leader laughs. "Help me? Help _me_? Sugar, how'n Earth can you help me?"

I stammer, drawing a blank. But before I can actually give a response one of the other patients, a red head, tugs at the hillbilly's arm impatiently and whispers something hurriedly into his ear. When he's done, the leader looks thoughtful.

"Well…" He strokes his beardless chin. "Come to think o' it darlin', there is a way you could help me." I don't bother to respond and just wait for him to continue. "You see… my companion here has just informed me that the J-Boss is lookin' for a pretty blondie doctor such as yerself."

My eyes widen in fear automatically. "Do you mean the Joker?" I ask.

"Mmhm. Yes ma'am I do," he grins. "Boss says he'll reward anyone who brings you in. An' me an' my boys intend to get that reward."

Son of a bitch… He's got a bounty on me!? What the hell, is the entire asylum after me now? That's not fair! I'm scared shitless, but I'm pissed off too.

 _Hey! You cheating fuck! Offering a reward for my capture is **cheating**!  You are supposed to find me. You're not following the rules!_

His response is immediate. Almost like he had been expecting me to say something soon.

 ** _Rules? Funny, I don't remember going over any rules…_**

Ugh, his voice is oozing with sarcasm. If he's going to be like that, then I can quip just as sarcastically too.

 _I didn't think we had to. I thought you'd be smart enough to know how to play._

 _**Hahahaha!**_

 _This isn't fair you know!_

 _**Fair? Harleen… I never said that I played fair. I guess**_ **you're _not smart enough to know that winners don't play fair._**

I don't even bother to dignify that with a response. I am fuming with rage!

 _S **ee ya soon kiddo.**_

I would have stomped my foot and screamed like a petulant child if I could have; but I didn't forget where I am and the situation that I'm in. The leader comes over and grabs me by my arm. Two other guys step over to Lyle and grab him by both of his arms. I try to squirm out of his hold but the hillbilly is stronger than he looks. "Let go of me! I can walk by myself!" I scream.

"Na ah. I ain't takin' no chances." He says with finality. The patient with the gun decides that it'd be best to keep it pointed at Lyle instead of at me. I'm guessing he made that decision based on a sexist perception. He thinks that the man is more dangerous than the woman. Well, I'll use that to my advantage. At the first opportunity, I'm ditching these guys. And of course, I'll find a way to get back Lyle too. I wouldn't leave him twisted in the wind like that…

They start escorting us down the ward toward the exit Lyle and I were running to just a moment ago. At this time, a hundred different scenarios are playing out in my head. I'm focused on trying to figure out how to get away from these people. So, it takes me by complete surprise when a man shows up out of nowhere to stand between us and the security gate. Seriously, I have no idea where he came from. Was he hiding in a cell or…?

"Leave these people alone Jeb. You've gotta stop hurting the people that work here." The defiant man says. He's riddled in tattoos, more so than the Joker. His face is tattooed like a skull. Maybe he has a thing for the day of the dead? He does look Latino…

"Outta the way Diablo! We're takin' these two to the J-Boss."

The skull guy is stern. "You know what he'll do to them if you do. I'm tired of watching you come through here man. Ya parale."

"Hey, hey, hey," Says the hillbilly who is apparently named Jeb. "None this concerns you, okay compadre? Now git, before Jia here puts one in you!" Jia slowly points the gun at the opposing inmate; he isn't phased by it all.

"Is that how you all want to play it?" The skull guy asks. "Fine, cabrones." A sudden ball of flame appears inexplicably in his palm. My eyes widen at the sight.

He's a super-human…

Everyone knows that the asylum has them, but to see this… This is incredible! It reminds me of when I met Croc. He was a super-human too, but with him, it was his appearance that marveled me. Sometimes, I'd like to consider Mr. J a super-human of his own kind too; his mind marvels me. Right now, this man is obviously here because he can spontaneously produce flames; this ability marvels me.

I'm not the only one affected by this new development. Lyle looks like he just shit himself and the other patients look shaken too but there's a hint of defiance written on Jeb's face. He chuckles a bit nervously. "So you got fire? What's fire to a bullet?" Jeb snatches the gun from Jia and points it determinedly at the skull guy.

The skull maintains his stance and only shrugs. "You wanna find out?"

Jeb doesn't say anything, but you can see every emotion cross his face. There's the obvious defiance, thoughtfulness, confliction, but overall, fear. It takes a minute for him to come to a decision, but eventually, he lowers his gun. "Fine! Leave 'em boys. We got other stuff to do anyways."

To Lyle and my relief, they let us go and follow Jeb out of the ward. When he passes the skull guy he says in a voice as menacingly as he can muster, "The J-man is gonna here 'bout this, _boy._ I wouldn' stick around if I was you…" And with that, Jeb and his posse left. Leaving us with the skull guy.

Lyle doesn't move. He's afraid of the new threat before us. I on the other hand am too grateful to be afraid. I was practically about to be handed to the Joker on a silver platter. I can never thank this guy enough for stopping that from happening. Without warning, I rush up to him and hug him with all my might. He's obviously super surprised and he doesn't hug me back, but he doesn't push me off either. I kept it short too; it probably lasted all but two seconds. When I let go, I put my gratitude into words. "Thank you. I know you didn't have to do that."

He recovers from the hug before replying. "Don't mention it. I got tired of seeing those ugly mugs stroll through here. I just wanted some peace and quiet."

"Does that mean you're planning on staying here?" I ask. "Why not try and get out like the rest of them? You can come with us. We've got a plan to get out of this place. We can help you, we owe you."

He looks disgusted by the thought. "Nah. I've got no place out there anymore. I'm staying here."

I'm about to ask him if he's sure about his decision. But Lyle tugs impatiently at my sleeve. "Come on, we don't have time for this. We gotta go before someone else gets in the way."

He has a point. I don't want to risk getting caught again. I look back at the skull guy and realize that I haven't even learned his name yet. "I'm Dr. Harleen Quinzel. In the future, if you ever need something, let me know. I owe you Mr….?"

"Diablo," he says briskly. "Just Diablo."

"Okay, there's no way I'll forget that. See you around Diablo." He nods in response and Lyle and I turn, practically running down the ward. We leap over the security gate and Lyle leads the way, down the hall to where the emergency stairs are.

To our relief, each hall was empty and there was no trouble. When we reached the stairs, Lyle opened the door slowly and poked his head in to see if he could hear anyone lingering around on the upper levels. Apparently the coast was clear because he quietly motioned for me to enter.

Let me say right now, that these stairs are a _doozy_. We have to climb up and up and up and up. Who knows how many flights there are; all I know is that they're _way_ more than my body is accustomed to climbing. Ever so often, I have to stop to take a breather. Sometimes when I do, I can see relief written all over Lyle's face. He gets tired too, he just doesn't want to show it for some reason. Other times, he seems very impatient and wants to keep moving. I try to keep myself going as long as I can but I can't help taking all of these breaks. I've got to work on my cardio…

After a _long_ while, we finally manage to reach the next available floor, but we keep taking the stairs. The next three floors are still lower level floors, and our goal is to reach the main floor; Floor one. We've still got more climbing to do…

When we pass the last door leading to the last lower level floor, I smile to myself; The next floor is our stop! The next floor is four flights of stairs up. When we reach the third flight we have to stop dead in our tracks because lo and fucking behold, someone's blocked our path. I should have seen something like this coming! There's desks, chairs, and a bunch of other stuff that have been used as a haphazard makeshift barrier to stop anyone else from ascending the stairs any further.

I sag to the floor, too tired to soak this new problem into my head yet. Lyle takes my actions as resignation. "No, no, no," he says confidently. "We can get past this. We'll just climb over it."

I look up at him doubtfully. "Climb over it?"

His eyes stay focused on the barrier, planning his steps. "Yeah. It shouldn't be too bad." He cautiously places his foot over a chair and grabs at the top of a stacked desk. He pulls himself up successful and continues to climb slowly and carefully until he actually makes it to the other side.

I have to say I'm impressed. I'm still sitting on my step but being now at the top of the stairs, he can still see me well enough; I applaud him quietly and he smiles wolfishly and actually bows. "Now it's your turn," he calls.

I shake my head, "I'm not so sure that I can do that right now."

"Come on, I'll help you. Just put your foot there and grab onto that and I'll pull you over."

I groan resignedly and push myself up on my feet. "Alright, I don't have much of a choice anyway."

Having watched Lyle do this a moment ago, I mirror his movements and stand and grab onto whatever I remember him doing. Lyle lurches over a pile of stacked desks and extends his hand out to me. I just have to get passed these chairs and boxes and I'll be able to reach him. I start pulling myself towards him when I hear a door open and close somewhere down below. I look to Lyle immediately, frozen. Lyle stares back looking petrified. We know patients are approaching; we just know it. I can hear their scufflings growing louder, getting closer.

I start scrambling over everything, trying to get closer to Lyle so he can quickly pull me up. If those patients get here, I'm the one who's toast, they'll be on my side of the barrier. Unfortunately, in my haste I wasn't quiet at all. A box or two falls and a chair tumbled down. Whoever is down below hears the commotion I'm making and their shuffling noises sound more rapid and urgent. They know, they're coming.

I reach out for Lyle's hand arduously, but to my horror, he retracts it.

I stare at him questioningly. "Lyle?"

He still has that petrified look on his face. He shakes his head apologetically. "I'm sorry, I can't."

No.

"What do you mean 'you can't'?" I demand.

He shakes his head more profusely. "I can't! I'm sorry, I can't! I don't want to get caught again. I'm sorry Quinzel."

"Lyle! All you have to do is pull me up, then we'll _both_ be safe. Hurry!" I reach out to him again in vain.

"No, what if they have a gun? I have to go before they see me. I'm sorry." Lyle is oozing with regret but it doesn't stop his resolve. He looks to me and mouths sorry one last time before turning away and ascending the stairs without me.

I stare in disbelief at where he used to be. "Lyle!" I scream out after him. What's the point in keeping quiet, I can hear them running up to me already. "You spineless pussy! Come back here and help me!"

I hear the door above open and then close. He's made it to the main floor and I'm stuck here…

The scuffling that was coming from below comes to a stop right behind me. I turn to find two ugly looking patients appraising me eerily. Without a word they start climbing over the obstacles towards me. I'm not going to be able to pull myself up over that last pile of desks by myself.

One of the creepy guys reaches me and grabs my foot. Before he can yank me down, I slip my foot out of his grasp and kick him with all of might right in his nose. He goes tumbling down, gripping his bloody face.

The other inmate grabs my same foot and manages to yank me down from my place. I crash into him gripping for anything that isn't him. I reach for the leg of a chair but it comes loose immediately when I grasp it. The inmate pins me down with his hands forcefully on my shoulders. With the wooden chair leg in hand, I swing it over the back of his head to try and knock him off. He lets go of me to grip his new wound and I take the opportunity to push him off. Looking at the chair leg in my hand, I notice there's a loose nail about to fall off. That explains why this came loose when I grabbed it… I pull out the nail and before the inmate rolls back on top of me, I roll over and straddle him. He looks up at me confused but that's all he has time to do before I thrust down the nail into his left eye. I jab it in three times before I scramble off him. He screams out in utter pain that I know will keep him occupied.

The other inmate sees me approaching and starts to rise to his feet, but I have the higher ground. With the chair leg in hand, I swing it down as hard as I can across his cheek. He falls back down and I jump down to his level to join him. I stand over him and raise the leg over my head only to swing it back down on his head with as much force as possible. I do this ten times before blood starts to splatter with each blow. It sprinkles my face and I know that it's safe for me to stop now. My chest is heaving with the excursion and the adrenaline is fading from my veins. I drop the chair leg and let myself slip to the floor to take a moment to bring myself down from the terrifying high I just had.

I look over at the other inmate whose eye I stabbed and realize that he must have fainted from the pain. I place my hand over my chest and exhale out the last of my angst. I take a moment to look at what I had done to the two before me. One has his eye caved in and the other his head. They're covered in their own blood and I'm splattered in it. Oddly enough, I don't feel ashamed or horrified of what I just did. I actually feel pretty tranquil and _juuust_ a bit proud. I'm not about to analyze what this means for my character development though. I have to keep moving. I'm not sure that I have the stamina to do this again if someone else decides to show up.

Observing the blockade, I immediately cancel out the idea of climbing over it. That's definitely _not_ happening. I feel completely drained of strength. But what other options do I have?

I glimpse at the unconscious patients resentfully. I hate that they're all walking around now like they own the place. Just earlier today things were the other way around.

Wait… If I were a patient, then I would be able to move around the asylum undisturbed too, right? All I have to do is blend in! Why didn't I think of this earlier? This is brilliant.

Examining my options, I decide to take the clothes off of the patient with the missing eye. His uniform looked cleaner. Getting his pants off was easier than his top; I was trying to avoid getting it stained from the blood on his face when I pulled it over his head but I couldn't help the bit that stained anyway.

I cast aside my doctor's coat and slip out of my red pencil dress. Trudging on the patient's uniform, I try my best not to gag at its scent. It smells like armpits and piss; a sour combination.

The clothes fit big, but they cover everything and I'm assuming I can pass as a patient, for the most part. Except… maybe my hair is too comely?

I loosen my ponytail and dig my fingers into the roots of my hair and start shaking and teasing it in odd places. Now it feels like there's a haystack on top of my head and the vanity in me doesn't like that. I reach into one of the pockets in my coat on the floor and pull out another hair band. I finger brush my hair swiftly and scruffily into two high ponytails to keep my hair out of my face. One ponytail would have been fine but I feel like having two makes me look more childish, which in turn makes me look more like I belong here.

Now, since I look the part, I should -hopefully- be able to walk around without getting into much trouble. So, going down a level and finding another stairwell or maybe even an elevator seems to be my best bet. I walk down the stairs and open the first door I pass. The other side is chaos.

There are patients running amuck _everywhere_.

They're running down halls, bumping and pushing into each other. They're jumping around and screaming. They're tearing things up, mostly papers and mattresses. They're throwing rolls of toilet paper everywhere. And, it seems like some of them are trying to get a fire going using two ripped off sticks from some piece of furniture. There's _a lot_ of weird stuff going on but I'm too nervous to question any of it. My plan is actually working. No one is bothering me because I'm dressed like one of them.

I walk down each hallway cautiously and quickly. I don't want to stick around long enough to be recognized. Every now and then, someone bumps into me and I freeze up for a second before I realize that it was just an accident and they weren't going to drag me away. A couple of patients even manage to smile at me when I pass or shout enthusiastically, to which I can only reply with a shy smile of my own or even a nod of acknowledgement.

I manage to find an elevator which I figure is safe enough for me to take, but when I call it and it arrives, there's a group of savagely wild patients in it jumping all over the confined space and bashing themselves against the walls and each other. So, I don't get in, obviously. That's a hard pass now.

I walk around on the level some, exploring, looking for a way up. I see some things I shouldn't, but for the most part, I see a ton of happy patients just partying hard and going nuts. They're actually making this whole situation seem fun. Now that I'm a bit calmer being among them, I actually feel a little happy for them. Though that's probably only because these guys haven't tried to attack me. I'm sure I wouldn't think the same if I was dressed as a doctor right now because then the situation for me would be _much_ different.

Eventually I come across another stair well and I start climbing up. This one isn't so private. There are patients running up and down and a couple of them are scribbling on the walls here and there with pen and pencil.

 ** _Doctor, doctor… Come out, come out wherever you are…_**

I smile to myself.

 _You know I'm about to win, right?_

 _**Oh are you?**_ He sounds like he's feigning interest.

 _Mhm, that's right. I'm almost home free and away from you. And you better stick to your end of the deal when I win._

There's a pause before he chuckles to himself.

 ** _We'll see about that Harleen…_**

I reach the main floor with no trouble. None of the patients bothered me and there was no ridiculous barricade to block me. When I open the door, stepping out of the stairwell area, I recognize that I'm near the back end of the asylum. I wasn't too sure exactly where these stairs would lead me up to. I was hoping to walk out the front door because my car is closer to the front entrance, but out is out. I'm much closer to the back docks where the trucks drop off deliveries. I'll just exit from there since it's faster and then once I'm outside, I'll snake myself around towards the front, hop in my car, and get the fuck out of here.

I start walking towards the back and immediately notice how eerily quiet it is around here. I can't hear the sounds of other people at all. I wonder if most of the staff managed to make it out.

It takes me little time to reach the loading docks. When I open the door to the lot, I'm met by a large group of loitering patients that're all sitting down looking pooped out. I have to remind myself that I look like one of them and they won't attack me on sight. I start stepping around them and head towards the lot exit so I can go around towards the front of the asylum. But, when it becomes apparent that my intention is to leave and not just looking for an isolated spot to sit in, one of the patients calls out to me to stop me.

"Hey!" A female voice stops me in my tracks. I turn around to find a small brunette woman with unbelievably disheveled hair, standing on her feet and approaching me. "Nu-uh, where do you think you're going?"

"O-out?" I meant to sound certain and unafraid but that just came out in the complete opposite effect, didn't it?

The woman gets in my face and mocks me. "O-oh. You're going o-out? J-just like that? I don't think so blondie. Not without the password you're not."

Password? Oh no… I'm screwed! I've got to think…

"But the boss gave me special permission to go!" I whine.

The woman narrows her eyes at me. "Did he?"

 _He._ My hunch about these guys working for Mr. J was right. "Yeah, he did," I nod. "He gave me special instructions to carry out in case that doctor of his shows up. He'll be mad if he knows you tried to stop me…"

She looks me up and down suspiciously before motioning for the other patients to approach. Everyone gets up and encircles around me. They've got me surrounded. There's probably twenty of them, too much to take on alone.

"Tell us, love," Says the woman. "What was this set of instructions you were given. Maybe we can help." She smiles.

Damn, I can't think of anything fast enough. "Sorry but that's classified. Boss's orders."

The woman pouts. "Aww, we were so eager to help you out too. Oh well! Just give us the password and we'll let you right on your way."

Fuck! I don't know it!

"The boss didn't give me a password, unfortunately…"

She cocks her head to the side in confusion. "Didn't give you a password? Impossible! He gave everybody a password. Everybody who works for him that is. So, that must mean… that you don't work for him, do you?

"No, I do! I swear I do! It just must have slipped his mind to give it to me, that's all."

She shakes her head determinedly and the others start closing in the circle. "Nope, you see, that's your mess up right there because… _nothing_ ever slips his mind." She snaps her fingers. "Get her boys."

Before I know it, there are, what feels like, ten hands on me all at once. I wanted to punch a couple of them off, at least. But, I've got like three people grabbing at each of my arms and I can't break free from all of the restraint. I try kicking at anything but they decide that they don't like that so a couple of them grab me from my legs and I end being carried like a rock star whose thrown himself into a crowd. I try wriggling free but it really is to no avail.

Initially, I just thought that they were going to beat me. But, as soon as they lifted me up, I knew with certainty what was about to happen. They're going to take me to him…

I start screaming in a panic but they _hate_ that. The brunette woman tells someone to shut me up and somehow on the journey, some black piece of cloth is tied over my mouth and around the back of my head.

We head into the building and my heart rate has sky rocketed. They're taking me straight to the bastard! What do I do? I start looking around frantically; Trying to find a way out of this, but I don't see one. What can I do with my limbs restrained by all of these hands? There must be something, _something_ I can do! But I can't think of anything… I'm starting to panic.

I have no idea what the Joker has in store for me. He never clarified what it was that he would get if he found me. I should have forced him to tell me. That way I'd at least know what I'm getting into and I can brace myself properly, or come up with some plan.

I was so close… so close to freedom! If these idiots hadn't been there I could've been home free and I would never have to see _him_ again.

By the time they carry me into an elevator, I realize that I'm hyperventilating so I try and calm myself down by thinking about unrealistic nonsense.

He's not going to kill me. He can't… right? I'm his _soulmate_. He must be incapable of hurting me. Then again, he has hit me… I'm okay with taking a beating if it comes down to it. But perhaps I'm thinking the worst for no reason. On some level he must love me. He _has_ to. He doesn't have a choice. As much as I resent him right now, even I can't deny that I still have feelings for him. Maybe he doesn't want to hurt me at all. Maybe he just wants me because he wants to keep me close. Maybe I've been misjudging him all this time. Maybe I've been looking at this all wrong.

I know how ridiculous I must sound. I can still hear the faint voice of rationality in me that is disregarding everything I'm saying but I'm muting that part out. I need to be calm now. In fact, I've tricked myself so well, that I'm actually starting to feel a bit hopeful that I might have misjudged the whole situation.  
When the elevator dings and the doors open, I still feel scared for what's to come, but I feel a lot more ready for it.

As to whether we traveled up or down, I couldn't tell you. I wasn't paying attention at all, though I should have been. We start walking down some halls and I realize that I'm actually not too familiar with whatever floor we're on; not enough to know immediately where it is they're taking me.

Eventually, I'm carried into some great room with all kinds of scary medical equipment hung up on the walls. As they put me down on some steel examination table, I notice the brunette woman slip away into some back room.

The inmates let me sit up but it's only so that they can force me into a straight jacket. I fight it but they get me into it anyway. I take it they have a great amount of experience with these things so they learned all the right ways to get me into it surprisingly quickly and efficiently. Once it's on, they step back and leave me sitting up on the table. The woman reappears from the back room with a proud look on her face. A few moments after, _he_ immerges from the same room.

When I look at him, for a moment, he's the only person I see. He isn't wearing a shirt and I'm shocked by how surprisingly built he is for such a slender man. His body is decorated in various tattoos and his skin is so pale, but somehow, he just looks so… _right_. I feel like I've been staring at his body for too long, so I bring my attention to his face… and that's when reality kicks in again; when I see that cocky, mischievous smile of his.

When his eyes meet mine, for the ever so smallest of moments, he seems a bit relieved. But the look is immediately replaced by that signature wicked grin of his. He stalks over to me like a beast staring at his next meal and I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared. That smile terrifies me…

When the Joker approaches, everyone steps silently to the side to let him through, but they don't leave; they're all spectating. The Joker stops before me to appraise me unabashed, giving me a _good_ look, up and down. He hooks his fingers under his chin and then cocks his head to the side, focusing on me. "I gotta say toots… this look _really_ suits you."

I'm reminded of the fact that I don't look like the doctor he's used to seeing. I've got big baggy inmate clothes on with a straight jacket over, messy fucked up pigtails, and there's probably still splatters of blood across my face. I would love to retort back at him with something smart, but I've still got the clothe gag in my mouth and I don't want to sound like an idiot talking around it; so, I just settle with glaring at him. Apparently, my face amuses him because he laughs at my lack of response. The crowd joins him, though I don't think they share his sense of humor, I think they're just trying to score some brownie points.

"It really does _doc_! I told you you _belonged_ in here like me, didn't I? Well," he gestures to my outfit. "Look at ya now. You look _perfect_. The hairstyle is a nice touch too."

I roll my eyes by way of response.

The Joker pouts. " _Aw_ , you don't agree?"

I say nothing.

"Uh, _Harl_. I asked you a question."

I can't help but notice the new nickname. I always make a mental note of each new name he comes up with for me.

I flicker my eyes quickly down referring to the clothe tied around my mouth. The Joker follows where my eyes point and he feigns understanding. "Ah! Of course! Let me get that for ya doc." He comes closer and nudges my head gently forward so that he can reach the knot of the clothe behind my head. Once it's untied, he pulls it out of my mouth, dragging his fingertips along the clothe across my cheeks. "My, my, my…" He looks at the crusted red residue on his fingers. "Haven't we been busy…"

" _We_?" I stress. "No. _I_ 've been busy. I've been playing by the rules while you, you _cheater_ , have been sitting around letting everyone else do your work for you!"

The Joker smiles finding my response entertaining. "Well _doc_ , it's like I told you before; I never said I'd play by the rules. And as a matter of fact, while we're on the subject… _you_ weren't playing so fair yourself, were you?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Look at you. Dressing up like one of us and trying to blend in? That's cheating if I ever did see it." He turns to the little crowd. "Isn't that right?" Everyone shouts their agreement.

The Joker smiles in triumph and then cocks his eyebrows at me as if to say, "you see?"

I just shake my head and look away angrily, knowing that pushing it further isn't going to get me anywhere; not with these people.

" _And_ … the blood?" He asks excitedly. "On your face. How'd that happen?"

I don't want to tell him what I did. Somehow, I feel like he'd never let me live it down. "It was an accident. That's all."

"Aw, an accident?" He then turns to the crowd. "You hear that? Little Harleen here was in an accident! But I think… that something isn't right here… Don't you all think so?" The crowd cheers in agreement and when the Joker slowly turns back at me, he's wearing a sly, up-to-no-good grin. When he speaks, he's examining me while still addressing the others. "Now you see, I know for a fact that that blood isn't her's. Look at her, she doesn't have a single scratch on her. _So_ …" He turns to the other patients. "Who's blood is it?"

Everyone starts shouting out possible names all at the same time, though the Joker feigns thoughtfulness and nods ever so often as if he was actually taking anything of what they were saying into consideration. "You know what? I think you're all _right_ … This blood belongs to one of our own, doesn't it?" The patients cheer. "She wouldn't hurt one of her own, would she? So… It's got to be one of us." The patients start screaming angrily and the Joker turns to me and addresses me. " _Ms._ Quinzel- oops. I meant- _Doctor_ Quinzel." He looks back at the others briefly. "We can't forget that she's a doctor. Dr. Quinzel, I'm going to give you the floor in a minute and I hope that you decide to tell us all the truth. Because you see… We _despise_ liars here, don't we?" Everyone agrees. "And uh… You _don't_ want to know what we do with liars…" I hear twenty different threats being thrown at me all at once, I can't make any one of them out clearly.

"Shut up!" The Joker shouts and everyone falls silent instantly. He then gestures to me with a wave of his hand. "Harleen, you have the floor."

I visibly gulp. This whole thing is so stupid! This " _trial_ " is a big farce! I know how he wants this to end. He's putting on a show so that he can publicly shame me. He might even want to kill me right here in front everyone. This could be it for me…

I might as well tell the truth then. I'm screwed either way. He might even go a little easy on me if I play along. "Ladies and gentlemen of the jury..." Out of the corner of my eye I notice the Joker smiling exuberantly at my cooperation. "I have to confess that I'm… I'm… I'm guilty." The patients hoot. "I was confronted by two male patients and I stabbed one's eye out and he fell unconscious. The other one… is probably dead. I bashed a hole in his head." Everyone starts shouting angrily at me but what rings out to me is the Joker's rising laughter. He's beside himself with cackles. He even grips his stomach, it's too much for him to handle. The patients start getting too angry and the Joker is busy laughing his guts out over there. He probably wouldn't notice if one of them tried anything right now. I try easing the severity of my case in an attempt to calm them. "I didn't do it on purpose, I swear! It was self-defense! They would've hurt me if I didn't hurt them!" I shout over them but no one is really listening. They want _justice_.

Amidst the commotion of the crowd, the Joker manages to pull himself together and stumbles over to me. Leaning in my ear, he says. "I knew you were just like me."

When he pulls back to look at me, I glare at him. "I am _nothing_ like you."

The Joker only smirks and moves back to readdress the mob. "Well ladies and germs, you heard it from the doc herself. She's guilty. So she should be punished, shouldn't she?" They all cheer. The Joker turns to me in feigned sympathy. "Sorry doc. The jury's spoken." He shrugs. "And it's a good thing I already have something in mind… Oh Johnny boy!"

Some odd man in a suit emerges from somewhere in the crowd, wheeling along a table cart carrying a lot of electrical equipment. As outdated as they are, I recognize what's about to happen immediately.

"Shock therapy?!" I shriek.

The Joker grins and nods. "It's all ready for you. Are you ready?"

"No!" I scream and try to jump off the table I'm sitting on but the Joker stops me by placing a firm hand on my shoulder. "Ah, ah, ah Harleen. These are the consequences for losing. You have to do this." Suddenly he reels back and I'm met with a swift hard punch on my lower left eye. I didn't see the punch coming so I wasn't ready for it. I don't have time to react to it because then the Joker slams me back down on the steel table. He snarls in my face, " _That_ was for walking out on me. Don't _EVER_ do that again."

He keeps me down with a hand to my chest and calls Johnny over. He's handed some wires that the Joker expertly attaches to my temples. Then he places a brown leather belt in my mouth and straps the rest of my body down. He taunts over me, "I'd hate to say that this was going to be easy, so I'm not going to." He grins wickedly. "I've found that shock therapy at its best can make you forget _so many_ things. So… Johnny Johnny, crank it up to max."

My eyes widen both in fear and realization. No… He can't make me forget it. I won't! I start screaming around the leather in my mouth but none of my words are coherent enough. I squirm against my restraints but they're too tight. This is really happening…

I'm too panicked to notice anything happen outside of me anymore. So, without warning, two pieces of metal are pressed against either side of my temple and a horrible unbridled pain shoots instantly through me. I rattle and shake uncontrollably. The pain is so unbearable, it's literally the only thing I'm aware of. In my mind I'm begging for mercy from no one in particular. The events leading up to this are blurring away in my head and the pain is the only thing that remains. I just want it to stop. Why won't it stop?!

As though my prayers were answered, the pain suddenly stops. I open my eyes to find a blinding white light shining over me, and the outline of a man's head leaning over me, staring at me. The light is too bright and I can't make out the features of his face, but I notice that the outline of his hair is shaded… green? The man's outline then leaves my view.

Exhausted from the pain. I shut my eyes, lacking the strength to keep them open anymore.

Before my fatigue takes hold of me, I hear footsteps walking away from me, and a familiar voice says, "Take her."

* * *

 **AN: I am soooooooooooooo sorry for the long wait! I always do this to you guys don't I? I hope you all forgive me. I tried to make it up to you by making this chapter super long; the longest yet.**

 **I want to thank everyone for sticking with the story; this ends the first arch!**

 **I hope to update again soon (sooner than last time anyway...). Thanks for dropping all of the reviews for the last chapter, I LOVE reading them.**

 **I'll see you all soon in the next chapter! Peace.**


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